


Blossom in Fall

by baeconandeggs, museofthedawn



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: BAE2017, Infidelity, M/M, Rimming, age gap, extreme dub-con, unprotected sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-30
Updated: 2017-05-30
Packaged: 2018-11-06 17:45:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 47,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11041128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baeconandeggs/pseuds/baeconandeggs, https://archiveofourown.org/users/museofthedawn/pseuds/museofthedawn
Summary: An ever aspiring street photographer Park Chanyeol found his light in the form of Byun Baekhyun. Only when a relationship had come to fall apart, their love had a chance to blossom.





	Blossom in Fall

**Author's Note:**

> Author: anonymous  
> Prompt#: 309  
> Title: Blossom in Fall  
> Word Count: 47.522  
> Side Pairing(s): Sehun/Baekhyun  
> Rating: NC-17  
> Warning(s):age gap, infidelity, extreme dub-con, rimming, unprotected sex  
> Disclaimer: The celebrities' names/images are merely borrowed and do not represent who the celebrities are in real life. No offense is intended towards them, their families or friends. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this fictional work. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> Author's Note: Hopefully I won't be seen as problematic since I took it upon myself to include dub-con that is almost close to non-con in this story for the sake of plot development (even though it applies to the side pairing). I'm aware it could potentially, negatively influence people and perpetuate rape culture, but that is not my intent. And I wouldn't condone the action happening in the real world so I apologize in advance.
> 
> To the prompter, hopefully this is what you expected. I really love your prompt, and I hope you enjoy this just as much as I enjoyed writing it. To my one and only R, my first reader ever, thank you for helping me out with almost everything. You know how much I love you. To my wonderful beta N, thank you for all your help and encouragement. I don’t know what I would do without you. Also big and special thanks to all of BAE mods for running this round and being so kind and patient with me. You guys are such angels ;; Finally, to everyone who reads this story, thank you. I hope you will treat this kindly <3

A man in his early twenties with impeccably attractive features that are too dazzling for someone his age sat on the very back seat of a bus, heading towards the smallest and southernmost city in South Korea that he did not know any knowledge of. The bus was not packed with a bunch of people, unlike the bus he always took every day in Seoul. It was almost empty considering the seats were only occupied by a few people including him. Scanning his surroundings, he began to notice the quiescence that had been engulfing him for a couple of hours. A few seats away from him sat a figure of a woman with long black hair that went past her shoulder gazing out the window – her shoulders straightened and her arms were folded before her chest. She seemed still like a statue that the man thought she might have fallen asleep in that uncomfortable position. There was a luggage sitting in the baggage compartment above her seat, and if the man were to guess, the woman was probably going to visit her parents in town. It was when the woman craned her neck a few moments after that the man noticed she was actually wide awake. He shifted his gaze towards another occupant of the bus. Sitting two seats behind the driver‘s seat, a middle-aged man with a couple strands of grey hair leaned his head on the window, drowning in his afternoon slumber. For some reason, he envied how it seemed effortless for the man to sleep his fatigue away like he wouldn’t care less if the bus would change its route and take him to a remote place he wasn’t familiar with instead of his destination. It had been almost five hours since the bus took off, and the man sitting on the back couldn’t even sleep a blink.  
  
He shifted in his seat as he averted his focus outside of the dew-covered window. Countless of trees were fleeting before his eyes, and the clouds above were moving in an opposite direction. Everything before him was moving at a seemingly rapid pace, but time was ticking slowly as he glanced at his watch. The man began to get anxious since the bus didn’t seem to stop any sooner. He opened the window, letting a gust of wind infiltrate inside. The air was refreshing as it blew against his face, but for some reason, he couldn’t find it in him to breathe the fresh air into his lungs.  
  
It wasn’t his first time to be assigned to work outside of Seoul and yet he felt suffocated for no particular reason. Something was bothering him, but he wasn’t sure what it was that made him feel that way. _Must be the anxiety_ , the man thought. He should’ve been thrilled or excited, to say the least, but he wasn’t. Instead, he had this strange feeling that something was about to happen. Something he couldn’t define just yet.  
  
A trail of thoughts was haunting his mind as he kept his gaze fixated upon the passing road that was covered with pale yellow leaves. After what seemed like an endless journey, the man was suddenly pulled out of his reverie when the bus slowly pulled over to a stop at a terminal. He stood up and brushed invisible dust off his coat before getting off the bus with a knapsack on his back and a camera bag slung over his shoulder. He straightened his back ever so slightly and made his way down the aisle to exit the bus. He didn’t forget to express his gratitude to the bus driver by bowing his head, muttering a soft _thank you_. The driver smiled warmly at him, wishing him an enjoyable visit ahead.  
  
The weather was rather cold outside, and a gust of wind passed through him as he exited the bus. The vicinity of the area where he got off was a bit desolate as there weren’t many people wandering around. He wondered if the terminal had always been that quiet. Passing the gate, he walked out from the terminal and took a turn to the left. He strode up the stone pedestrian walk for a few miles – walking straight and taking a few turns until he could spot a more populous area. More stores and short buildings came into view–and boy, was he _thankful_. He could now see cars speeding on the high way and a couple of people walking idly down the street. Their countenance was rather calm that it was unnerving. No one looked like there were in a hurry, and they walked like they had no burden in their lives.  
  
The sight was something that the man had seldom encountered in his life in Seoul. It was new to him. He’d grown accustomed to a rapid pace of life in the city where people walked like they were always in a rush. Each movement around him was swift, and the sound of people chattering could be heard in every corner of the city. So to be welcomed by practically a different situation, he strangely felt out of place. He felt far away from home. Maybe it would take him a while to adjust himself to the unfamiliar surroundings, but the man wished it wouldn’t be too long.  
  
Scanning around the area, he decided to take his camera out of his bag to start taking some pictures. The view didn’t look too bad, and the man thought maybe he could snap a number of decent images before heading toward his place of staying. He put the camera bag into his backpack. Fortunately, there was still a little bit space left – enough for him to shove the thing inside.  
  
Hanging the strap around his neck, the man looked through the viewfinder. He aimed for something that _called_ to him and snapped a couple of shots of the view in front of him. It was a group of high school students clad in their uniforms with their backpacks on walking toward him. They weren’t friends, it seemed, as they kept their heads down staring at the ground as they walked, unaware of their surroundings.  
  
He looked at the images he had taken as soon as he finished. He clicked his tongue as he skimmed through them, unsatisfied because none of them turned out good enough. Some images were too bleak to his liking. Some others were okay, but they weren’t as decisive as he expected they would be.  
  
The man sighed, a look of frustration visible on his face. He decided he would just call it a day and go to the hostel to check in. After all, he still had a couple of weeks ahead of him in the town, and he sincerely hoped he would get more inspired as each day passed. He felt like exhaustion had drained up all of his energy after long hours of journey to get there, and that was probably the sole reason why he felt lost.  
  
The man continued to stroll down the pedestrian walk until he stopped by a traffic light. He had to wait for a while before the light for passerby turned to green. Looking to his right side, he noticed an elder standing beside him with a walking stick in her hand, her back bent a bit forward. The man bowed slightly to the elder as a smile of politeness lit up his face. When the light turned green, he wasted no time and walked closer to the elder, offering her a hand, “I’m going that way,” he pointed to end of the crossroad, “Let me walk you.” The elder nodded and took his offer. She placed her hand on the crook of the man’s arm as he led the way.  
  
When they reached the end of the crossroad safely, the elder patted on the man’s upper arm and expressed her gratitude, “Thank you. It’s so rare to find people like you nowadays.”  
  
The man just smiled upon hearing the elder’s statement as he said, “You’re welcome, _ahjumma._ Please be safe on your way.” Before he was about to walk away after bowing his torso in a long, 90 degree bow, the elder stopped him by asking, “What’s your name, young man?”  
  
“Huh?” The man arched his brow before he realized that the elder wanted to know his name. “Oh, it’s Chanyeol,” he introduced himself with another humble bow.  
  
“Are you from outside of town?”  
  
“Yes. I’m from Seoul. I just got here today.”  
  
“Where are you heading to, young man?” the elder inquired as she started pacing slowly with her stick, making Chanyeol follow suit next to her.  
  
“I’m looking for a specific homestay. It’s around here.”  
  
The elder had to crane her neck upward to ask another question, “Where is it? Maybe I can help with the direction.”  
  
“I appreciate the help, but it’s okay, _ahjumma._ I can manage myself.”  
  
“Well, then, young man, I hope you enjoy your stay here.” The elder patted his shoulder for the last time before she took her leave. Smiling, Chanyeol bowed again as the elder slowly walked further away from him.  
  
Actually, Chanyeol still hadn’t had the idea of where his staying place at. He fished his phone out of his pocket, attempting to search for his staying place location through his mobile map. He typed down the name of his hostel, and in a blink of moment, the direction toward the place he was heading to appeared on the screen. He took a long deep sigh before he began following the direction. He was thankful that it was not that far from where he was standing. He just had to walk straight a few miles, cross another street and pass a few more blocks before he got to his place.  
  
The sky was still blue above his head, and the sun was still glaring its rays at him. There were actually a lot of things he could do before the sun set like going to a park or trying out some new dishes, but Chanyeol was too exhausted to keep carrying on his amble. For the rest of the day, he had decided that he just wanted to sleep away his fatigue and wake up in a much better state the next day. He had a long journey to look forward to after all.  


***

  
  
Chanyeol had been sitting inside of a café not too far away from his lodging. Before him, his overpriced latte sat prettily in a white china cup, a leaf pattern in delicate milky foam among the pale brown. It had just been served to him a few minutes ago. He wrapped his fingers around it, enjoying the heat that was spreading through his hand. He took his first sip – letting the caffeine sit on his tongue a little longer.  
  
He placed the mug back to its original position before leaning his head against the window pane, staring blankly at the scenery outside. There were shops lining up like obedient soldiers, cars speeding up under direct sunlight, a silhouette of trees appearing on the pavement. On the street, Chanyeol observed carefully as people were walking in different paces and directions. The sky was a bright shade of blue high above their heads. Attempting to take a photograph, he took his camera lying on the table next to his coffee mug and raised it to his eye level. The town was moving yet everything was still dark in his camera lens. The morning was as old as the coffee on his desk. There was simply no _light._ No stories being told in every photograph he had taken ever since he got there.  
  
He thought it would be temporary. He thought he would get his muse back as he was back into the field after a few weeks of vacuum. He had thought wrong. It had been a couple of days since he arrived in the town, yet he still couldn’t find it in him to get himself back on track.  
  
For the last three years, Chanyeol had been working as a street photographer. He moved from one place to another, capturing moments of everyday life in public settings for the gallery he worked for. It started when his father bought him a DSLR when he was in high school as a birthday gift that he began to take pictures randomly. At first, he wasn’t confident of his skill, but his friends kept telling him that the pictures he took were extraordinary. They supported and encouraged him to join a photography contest in their school, and so he _did_. He didn’t expect that his images would get much recognition when they were put up for the school exhibition. He got praised a lot because his images were honest and sincere. When he was confident enough of his skill, he joined some more competitions in photography and won first place for a few consecutive times.  
  
Chanyeol was actually a man who grew up without a dream. While most of his high school friends had set a goal of what they wanted to do when they became an adult, Chanyeol was clueless. He wished to be a musician, but he wasn’t sure if being a musician could give him a decent life. When his father found out about his interest in photography, he was surprised to see his father give him a sign of encouragement. Instead of demanding him to follow his path of being a lawyer and enroll in law school, his father told him that he wasn’t going to force him to _be_ like him. He would support him financially and emotionally no matter which path he would choose in the future, and so Chanyeol _chose_ to pursue his career as a photographer.  
  
Throughout the journey of pursuing his career as a professional photographer, Chanyeol came to learn that there was always a beauty hidden even in every part the world, and in his case, it was the beauty in every scene that unfolded before his eyes. A crowd of people lining up in front of a food stall, a mere sight of two lovebirds swaying hands in the park, students chattering while walking down the pedestrian, and even a view of a middle aged woman walking alone in a quiet park. Those were all actions that ordinary people could find in ordinary places, but they were _stories_ – interesting stories being told in every image that he captured. For him, being a street photographer taught him to be more emphatic in life because he got to feel what his subjects might have felt when he examined them through his lens. And it was like a long, endless journey for him to discover himself. It was sure bound to be a lifelong journey.  
  
Chanyeol was snapped out of his reverie when he heard a honk of car coming from outside of the café. He couldn’t tell what happened beforehand, but when he looked outside, a man was standing a few inches away from a car stopping before him, his face as confused as a stray cat. The man bowed his head slightly as he drifted away from the scene towards the pedestrian walk, making a turn to the left.  
  
The man walked past him, and for a brief moment, they locked gazes. There was something about the man that kept Chanyeol’s stare fixated on him even though they were separated by the tint glass window. Chanyeol didn’t know him. He didn’t know what his name was, and he surely didn’t know where he lived. But Chanyeol knew there was something about the man that drew him in. Something about the man that made his heart thump wildly in his chest when their gazes locked.  
  
Chanyeol could feel it. The feeling when you met someone you had never met before, but you feel somewhat attracted to them simply because they looked physically attractive.  
  
Without second thought, he jumped out of his seat after he shoved his pack of cigarettes into his pocket and dashed out of the café. He didn’t know what he was going to do when he found him. Maybe he only wanted to take a closer look at him. Maybe he wanted to know what his name was. Maybe he wanted to know if he was from this area, or maybe, just _maybe,_ he wanted to ask for his phone number – if he was brave enough.  
  
He took a turn to his right, searching for that exact man with lithe figure and brunette hair. He pushed through a few people walking on the street and soon apologized. The street was not even jam-packed with a lot of patrons, but he couldn’t find a sight of him anywhere. Chanyeol stumbled onto a few pebbles and almost fell into the pavement, but he managed to stay on his feet. He kept searching, tilting his head left and right, scanning through faces of people passing by but he was not there.  
  
Chanyeol was too late. It seemed like the brunet had disappeared into one of the shops or alleys. He wanted to check every one of them that was close to where he was standing, but he was already way too disoriented to continue looking for him. So he gave up and went back to his homestay instead.  


***

  
  
The next few days, it was breezy. The sun had not yet risen high enough to warm the population of people in town. The wind was blowing rather harshly, and most people were dressed up in thick layers of clothes to keep themselves warm. Some people would choose to spend the entire day curled up in a cozy fluffy blanket, and some others would prefer to work in a warm building accompanied by a cup of hot coffee, but Chanyeol wouldn’t want another day in Autumn to go to waste. It was Autumn, and Chanyeol loved Autumn wherever he was because it was always the same. The leaves turned into vibrant colors of yellow, red, orange and brown, creating a magnificent sight. Fallen leaves were scattered all over the pavement, making a carpet on the ground. The wind whistled wildly that it was almost impossible for people not to shiver in the cold.  
  
Dressed up in a turtleneck sweater, long brown coat and dark jeans, Chanyeol was shivering underneath as the cold breeze threatened to seep deeper into his skin. Despite the harsh coldness, he kept walking past alleys in a steady pace, searching for one picture-perfect spot for his exploring site. He already had his bag of camera and lenses slung over his left shoulder. Stepping his foot on the pavement, he scrunched up his nose as he looked around, observing his surroundings. The town was way _too_ unfamiliar for him. He had travelled a lot as a young man, but most of the time, his destination were always big cities with a contemporary, modern feel. Not to mention, he was so used to living within the hustle and bustle of big cities that never slept like Seoul where he could hear the sound of people chattering around him, or the loud noises of car honks stuck in a traffic jam and encounter hundreds of faces of people passing by almost every day. Then, to be welcomed by almost pure solitude in this town was a whole new experience. Perhaps, he shouldn’t have compared this town to a city like Seoul in the first place. This town seemed like an absolute opposite of Seoul, though. It held an old and weary mood that almost choked the man to death.  
  
He had read many good reviews about the town before he got there, and there were many places of interest as well as a diverse selection of restaurants and bars to be found there. One of his friends told him there were quite many places to explore in the town, so he was determined to stroll around until he could find something worth capturing. He didn’t want to give up just yet. It had only been a few days, and he still had one month and a half to finish his project for the gallery.  
  
Chanyeol clenched his fists inside the pockets of his coat, trying to warm his almost freezing hands. One yellow maple leaf suddenly fell on his nose. He kneeled down and took the leaf that landed before his shoes and brought it to his palm. As he was about to blow it away, the wind came whistling by and sent it dancing to the sky. Chanyeol’s lip formed into a crescent smile.  
  
After long minutes of strolling down the pedestrian walk, he stopped at a secluded park, away from the highway. He let out an exasperated sigh and dragged his long limbs rather sluggishly towards a big rain tree to take a short break. Entering the park, a slight cold breeze rustled the leaves, making them fall to the ground one by one. The air was rather chilly, but there were beams of sunlight that managed to peek through the clouds and glow on his skin.  
  
There was a small rusty bench standing under the tree – a bench that had probably been sat over a couple of seemingly unconnected people. He plopped himself on the bench and decided to look at some of the images he had taken that day from the camera hanging over his shoulder, the strap chafing against his nape.  
  
It had been almost a week since he arrived and yet he had only managed to snap a couple of pictures, none of them were close from being good enough. They were mostly forced and unfocused. And Chanyeol didn’t like how they turned out.  
  
He stilled as he wondered where he ever dropped his muse. Was his muse retired? Was it dropped along his journey getting here? Did it get stuck in the drain? He had no idea.  
  
He stood up and straightened his figure, taking a meticulous look around the area as he strode away from his previous spot. The park was unusually quiet and weary as there weren’t many people wandering around the area. It was a total contrast of the one he usually visited near his apartment in Seoul. In the city, parks mostly meant acres of concrete interspersed with neat grass, crowded with people and various street vendors. There were also some sport courts for public use. Here in the countryside, however, the park was a kind of place in its absolute stillness. There weren’t any tracks for rollerblading, tennis courts, basketball courts or skateboard basins. There were only benches in every corner of the park and a small traditional Korean hut in the middle and some old swings in the stationary. If there was a person moving, he would hear it. He was alone. And there was barely even a soft whisper from what leaves remain in the late autumn trees.  
  
On the end of the stoned pathway, however, there were a few food stalls offering various kinds of cheap mouthwatering street food. Chanyeol lowered the camera he had raised to eye level and zoomed in, aiming to take a picture of a few citizens lining up to buy the street food.  
  
“This isn’t working,” Chanyeol muttered to himself and ran his hand through his messy, windblown hair.  
  
Though he was frustrated that he had yet come to a satisfying outcome, he kept aiming and searching for his fitting subject as he walked around the park. It was easy for him to take pictures, but what was _not_ easy was to snap a decisive moment in which timing was crucial as it would greatly affect the result of the images he had taken.  
  
The next subject of his shoot was a sight of a mother in her mid-thirties and her son swaying their hands together. The mother’s left hand held on to the boy’s hand tightly while her other hand was carrying a bag of groceries. They looked happy, and Chanyeol wanted to accentuate that happiness visible on their faces through his lens. And so he captured.  
  
_Click. Click. Click._  
  
It turned out okay, but for some reason, it still felt empty.  
  
As he was aiming for another moment to shoot, he spotted someone through his lens, his side figure facing him. He looked up and was stunned by a lithe figure sitting on the bench he occupied a while ago. He was wearing a light brown sweatshirt and a coat in a darker shade of orange, black tight jeans hugging the contour of his legs. There was something angular about him that lured Chanyeol to take a few steps closer.  
  
He meticulously observed the familiar figure, and he almost jumped up in surprise as he remembered something. He was the exact same man he saw in front of the café a few days ago. His beauty was radiating under the illuminated ray of sunlight, and Chanyeol couldn’t hold back his urge to snap a picture of him. So when the man wasn’t aware of his surroundings, he wasted no time to capture his image.  
  
He zoomed in and brought the subject into focus before constantly pressing the shutter button.  
  
_Click. Click. Click._  
  
Chanyeol stared at the result he had just snapped. For some reason he couldn’t quite comprehend, the photograph he took was not as bleak as it had been for a couple of days, and he was satisfied. At the moment, he internally declared to himself that he had finally found his _muse_ – a source of light that he had been searching for ever since he stepped foot in the town _._ He was the _light_ Chanyeol had been constantly seeking. The light shining as bright as a diamond even in the place so weary.  
  
He took another glance at the man. From the side of the petite figure, Chanyeol could see his eyelashes fluttering, gorgeous pink-tinted cheeks seemingly shimmering, rosy lips pouting. His fringe was slightly blown in the wind, brushing against his temple. There was nothing about that man that Chanyeol could consider as a flaw. He was an epitome of beauty.  
  
Chanyeol was taken aback when suddenly the man tilted his head up and looked at his direction with his brown hazel eyes. Chanyeol didn’t realize that he had been staring at the man for too long, mesmerized with his hands still holding the camera before his chest. The man frowned. He was kind of hesitated whether to give Chanyeol a light smile or not, so he ended up smiling awkwardly at the tall figure holding the camera before he averted his focus back to his notebook. Chanyeol posed a goofy grin in return. He knew the situation was awkward like he was just caught stealing, and he didn’t have a way to escape. If he could be reborn with superpowers, he wished he was reborn with teleportation power so he could teleport to any place to escape the scene.  
  
When he was about to walk away, the petite guy stood up before he closed the book in his hands, brushing off the dust on his coat. He walked towards him with an unreadable expression on his face. Chanyeol couldn’t tell if he was upset, but he was sure the other felt bothered by his presence. Frozen in his current position, he wished the world would just swallow him up right at the moment because he knew that guy was going to confront him about his rudeness of secretly taking pictures of him.  
  
“Excuse me,” he said in a soft voice, “I know it’s kind of rude to ask, but did you perhaps take a picture of me?” The petite guy asked with furrowed brows.  
  
“I.. I’m so sorry for being rude,” Chanyeol tried to compose himself, biting his lower lip, “I needed a subject for my shot and you just-” stopping to catch his breath, he continued, “You were there sitting under the tree and you were in the frame and.. you looked beautiful, so I just took your picture.” Chanyeol explained apprehensively, his right hand absentmindedly twirling the camera strap. To say that he was not nervous was a big lie. His incapability to speak coherently proved how nervous he was inside. Words couldn’t even come out of his mouth properly when there was such beauty standing right before him.  
  
Instead of getting upset, the petite guy’s cheeks flushed upon hearing Chanyeol’s honest remark. It was as if he had never been contemplated before.  
  
“I see.” He acknowledged as he tried his best to hide his smile.  
  
“Do you mind?”  
  
“I don’t know,” he raked his gaze up and down Chanyeol’s tall figure, observing the latter’s face a little bit too obvious, “I’ve never been photographed before. Not by some stranger.”  
  
Chanyeol shifted in his position, anxious because he was practically being confronted because of his demeanor. He knew he was being rude toward the man earlier, and he would want to reflect on his mistakes if needed.  
  
“Do you live around here? Your face doesn’t seem familiar,” the man examined him as he walked a few inches closer.  
  
“Oh, no, but I’m staying here for the time being. It’s for work.” Chanyeol explained, a hesitant smile lit up on his face.  
  
“Ah, a new guy.”  
  
“Are you from here?” Chanyeol questioned.  
  
The petite guy nodded and hummed a yes, “My house is just a few blocks away.”  
  
Chanyeol’s lips formed into an ‘o’ shape. He was itching to ask other questions, mostly about _him_ and _his_ life, but he concealed the desire to do so because he wasn’t in a position where he could approach him and ask him questions because he was the one that needed to be questioned for his impolite behavior, and besides, he didn’t want to make the other feel even more uncomfortable.  
  
When there was only a sound of rustling leaves stretched between the two of them, the man decided that there was no point of him standing there anymore so he bid him farewell before leaving, “Anyway, I gotta go. I’ve got something to do.”  
  
“Yeah, sure. Sorry about earlier.”  
  
“It’s okay, you can keep it. My picture, I mean. I hope you don’t use it to scare away rats at your house, though.” Chuckling, he bowed slightly before he uttered his farewell, “Bye, then.”  
  
Judging by his demeanor, he came to a conclusion that the brunette seemed like a nice guy. From the way he smiled at him instead of throwing a fit to how it was easy for him to tell a stranger where he lived; he looked like someone with a carefree personality. If only they didn’t meet in such circumstances, Chanyeol would definitely ask for his number and step up his game. There was no harm in wanting to get to know him better, _right_?  
  
Taking up all of his courage, Chanyeol braved himself and asked the other before he turned on his heels, “Wait, will I see you around?”  
  
Hesitant, the petite guy looked back, “I don’t know,” he pretended to think hard.  
  
“This is sort of like my hangout place. But I can’t guarantee I’ll be back here tomorrow. I’ll see you around.” His lips tugged up, forming a smile. He walked away, waving his hand to the taller. Chanyeol only gave a wide smile in return and waved goodbye.  
  
As a professional photographer, Chanyeol had never hoped for another chance to meet his subjects again, let alone approaching them and asking them to meet again for personal purposes. Given the fact that he was a street photographer, he only encountered them in, well, the street. He interacted with them in pedestrian walks or on crossroads, and he expressed his gratitude when necessary. However, he spent the rest of his afternoon thinking about the guy he met at the park with content heart and a light smile curved on his face. He didn’t even know his name, but he thought he might have fallen a bit for him. His cheeks turned bright red, and his stomach churned when he remembered the guy smiling at him with fondness in his eyes. His smile was nothing but radiant. And Chanyeol wanted to trade everything he had just to see his smile again and capture it with his camera so that he could look at it again when he felt like it. He wanted to meet him again and personally ask him to be his subject for the project he was working for. He wasn’t sure the other would agree, though, but one could only hope.  


***

  
  
Chanyeol decided to visit the same park again the following morning in hopes of meeting the guy for the third time if luck was in his favor. He fastened his pace down the road, passing by stores, restaurants and street vendors until he finally reached his destination.  
  
He looked around but there wasn’t any sight of a petite man with a notebook in his hand. A look of disappointment was painted all over his face. He walked towards the nearest tree and leaned against it, squatting down. He was deluding himself when he thought the guy would come back again for him. Maybe he shouldn’t have gotten his hopes up in the first place.  
  
“Have you been waiting long?” A familiar voice suddenly spoke in the air.  
  
Chanyeol immediately looked up upon hearing it, eyes sparkling with glee.  
  
“I don’t remember making a promise to meet you here.” The guy said as he approached the taller and stood in front of him.  
  
“But you came.” Chanyeol stood up and his lips turned into a crescent smile at the sight of the man in front of him.  
  
“That’s because I needed to be here. I actually go here every day to get some inspiration. I’m a writer, you see?” The guy grinned widely as he flashed his pen and notebook he kept in his pocket in front of Chanyeol.  
  
“Okay... so are you ever going to tell me your name?”  
  
“Well, I was actually waiting for you to ask.” A light chuckle resonated from the brunette. “It’s Byun Baekhyun. But you can call me Baekhyun.”  
  
Chanyeol smiled and looked him in the eye, “That’s a beautiful name.”  
  
The compliment came out too fast that Chanyeol wanted so badly to clasp his mouth with his palm, regretting his sudden outburst. But it was too late. The other had already bashfully grinned from ear to ear upon hearing it as he said, “Thanks.”  
  
Chanyeol offered his right hand to initiate a handshake as he said lowly, “My name’s Chanyeol.”And they shook hands. It was short and gentle, but that mere action already sent shiver down his spine. Baekhyun’s fingers were lithe and slim as they brushed against his palm. And Chanyeol was more than unwilling to let them go.  
  
“So where are you from exactly, Chanyeol?” Baekhyun’s question brought him back into focus. He turned around and ambled towards the bench under the tree.  
  
“What do you mean?” Chanyeol asked back, feigning ignorance. He trailed behind the shorter.  
  
“You’re not from around here, so where do you live?”  
  
“Ah, I’m from Seoul. I’ve been assigned here to snap some pictures for an exhibition. So I’ll be here for a couple of weeks.”  
  
“So that’s how it is,” Baekhyun nodded his head sagely in acknowledgement before proceeding to sit on the bench, “How long have you been here?”  
  
“It’s my seventh day here, I think. But I’ve taken quite a liking to this park. It’s not packed with many people, and you can just relax and enjoy your free time here.” Chanyeol punctuated. It was a lie, though. It was only yesterday he discovered the place, and the sole purpose he visited the park was to meet the guy.  
  
“That pretty much I agree. That’s one reason why I go here often. You know, fresh air, good view, less noise, and my brain works so much better when I’m hanging out here rather than being confined in my room. I can still write, but the ideas don’t flow as much.” Baekhyun explained.  
  
“Wow, that’s cool.” Chanyeol’s eyes were shimmering, showing a sign of interest in the conversation. He maneuvered to occupy the empty space next to Baekhyun, “I don’t know much about writing. But it’s true that you have to get out there and get inspired. So, are you like a book writer or –”  
  
“Definitely not a book writer.” Baekhyun interrupted. “Actually, you might say I’m just an amateur.” The shorter confessed as he swayed his feet under the bench.  
  
Chanyeol cocked an eyebrow quizzically upon hearing his answer, “How do you define amateur?”  
  
“I’m working under a site. So there’s like a site, and I post my works there.”  
  
“Do you get paid for it?”  
  
“Of course. It’s not called working if you don’t get paid for what you do.”  
  
Chanyeol laughed awkwardly to himself, “You’re right. So what do you write?”  
  
“Well, has this conversation turned into some kind of interrogation?” Baekhyun chuckled as he covered his amused face with his left hand. Chanyeol swore he had just seen an angel laughing. It was a soft, throaty laugh that sounded more like a melodious tone in his ears. He pouted and looked down for a brief second, avoiding eye contact with him and pretending to look sad. Chanyeol probably wouldn’t realize this, but he actually looked like an upset puppy at the moment.  
  
“I’m just kidding. You look cute when you’re upset.”  
  
Chanyeol had an urge to promptly hug the tree near the bench they were sitting on and almost made a fool out of himself because, wow, did he hear it right? That the brunet was calling him cute? This was the first time he received a compliment from him, and he felt giddy from it. He didn’t do it, though. He didn’t hug the tree, and he didn’t let the jubilance he felt inside show on his face. So instead of grinning widely, he managed to feign a serious look as he waited for the other to carry on his answer.  
  
“I write fiction, mostly. But sometimes I give my readers love and relationship advice if I feel like it.”  
  
“For real?” he asked, a bit too enthusiastically this time, “That’s really awesome. You must’ve been in a lot of relationships for you to give advice about things like that.”  
  
“Not really.” Baekhyun answered with a low sound of sigh.  
  
Chanyeol didn’t respond anything and just nodded in acknowledgement. He wanted to ask Baekhyun about his relationship; when was the last time he dated, was he dating anyone, but he thought it was not appropriate _yet_ for him to do so. They were practically still strangers to each other, and they were not that close to share about relationship stories. And more importantly, Chanyeol didn’t want to make him feel uncomfortable in any way possible.  
  
For a moment, there was a deafening silence hanging in the air.  
  
“Want me to read you one of my love advice that I wrote?” Baekhyun proposed, breaking the tension between them.  
  
“Tell me.”  
  
Before Baekhyun had a chance to quote his writing, his phone rang. He took it out of his pocket and stared at it for a few moments. The screen kept flashing, indicating that there was an incoming call. From the way his brows were knitted, Chanyeol could tell that he was pondering hard whether to pick it up or not. He hesitated, but he decided to pick up. He excused himself from the taller before he walked a few steps away from him.  
  
Baekhyun’s voice was too soft when he answered the call that Chanyeol couldn’t overhear what he was talking about on the phone.  
  
It took him a few minutes before Baehyun came back to his previous position, sitting next to Chanyeol promptly after he hung up. Chanyeol was about to ask him about the call, but Baekhyun had preceded him to apologize and excused himself to head home first, “Um, I’m sorry but I have to go. Thought I could spend my day here, but something came up.”  
  
Chanyeol tried to conceal his disappointment, forcing a smile, “That’s alright. I won’t keep you for too long here.”  
  
“I’m sorry. See you when I see you.”  
  
They exchanged humble bows before Baekhyun walked away and left the taller standing alone in the quiet park, his saunter slow but certain. Chanyeol watched until the petite figure’s back disappeared from view. He wasn’t sure if he could meet him again tomorrow or the next day, but he had promised himself to ask for his phone number the next time he did.  


***

  
  
It was Sunday morning when the first ray of sunlight peeked through the curtains of Chanyeol’s room. The blaring noise of his phone alarm went off, and it was anything but comforting. He let out a long groan and turned to his side. Rubbing his eyes, he indolently glanced at the clock on the bedside table; it was 7 a.m. Too early for anybody to wake up. But he woke up nonetheless, stretching his limbs ever so slightly.  
  
If there was anything Chanyeol should never miss on Sunday morning, wherever he was, it would be a few minutes to meditate. It had apparently become a habit for the young man to spare a few minutes of meditation to review the previous week. This kind of activity helped him to reflect on the learnings he had managed to obtain, and it also became a way for him to relieve the stress he went through for the past seven days.  
  
This time, Chanyeol decided to have a short mediation time while taking a long hot bath. He got up and shuffled to the bathroom, taking a towel on the way and wrapping it around his waist. When warm water washed over him, he felt as if all of burden had been lifted off his shoulder. He closed his eyes and let himself get immersed in his state of mind.  
  
Being away from the hustle and bustle of the city where everything went in a fast pace was something that Chanyeol had been struggling to adjust to. He had spent almost a week in town, yet the only good thing that had happened so far was his encounter with the petite man. _Jinhae_ – the name of the town Chanyeol was assigned to – was beautiful, and it provided very soothing and tranquil surroundings. But Chanyeol wasn’t interested in any of positive points the town had to offer. Baekhyun was beautiful as well, and he had become curious of the man more than the town itself. He wondered if he was the same age as him. He wondered what his favorite color was, what kind of things that he liked, what kind of food that he loved. He wondered if he already had a boyfriend.  
  
Chanyeol was starting to feel excited about the upcoming days he had yet to experience in the town. And he knew for sure Baekhyun _was_ the reason of it.  
  
As for his upcoming schedule, Chanyeol had decided he would ask Baekhyun to show him around the town and help him with his project. If he agreed, he would ask him out and bring him along with him every day to different places in town except Saturday. On Saturday, he would lie on the bed all day and watch random videos on Youtube until he got bored, _or_ he could start editing pictures.  
  
After a long minutes of warm bath, he shuffled out of the bathroom. He dried himself with the towel and got dressed, putting on his Marc Jacobs jacket over his T-shirt along with skinny jeans. He made sure to spray perfume all over his body. The scent wafted into his nostrils, and he grinned bashfully because he thought he smelled like a gentleman. He should thank Jongdae, his best friend and also the man whom he was working for, for buying it as a birthday present for him. When he thought he was ready to storm out, he took his camera bag lying on the floor and flung it over his shoulder.  
  
By the time he was out on the street, it was 8.15 a.m. The sound of birds chirping in the yellow trees welcomed him like a soothing melody to his ears. Above his head, the sky appeared blue with greenish tinge, and the clouds were moving swiftly in one direction. Chanyeol looked around his surroundings. He noticed the street was not as congested as it was during weekdays. Nobody went to work or school. Shops and restaurants were mostly opened late in the morning. For a moment, he was thankful for the tranquility.  
  
The photographer inhaled the fresh air into his lungs and kept walking until he stopped in front of a coffee shop. He got inside of the small building and headed toward the counter, ordering a cup of hot Americano to-go. The air was thick with the scent of coffee and a mix of milk and sugar. He placed his money on the counter as the cashier handed over his order. He inhaled the smell of a venti of brewed coffee in his hand and felt refreshed in a matter of seconds.  
  
Leaving the coffee shop with a hot cup of coffee in his hand, he followed the stoned pathway without any concrete destination in mind. Admittedly, Chanyeol was far from being organized. Whenever he was assigned to work outside of the city, he never came up with a plan. He was more of a spontaneous kind of guy; he didn’t prepare where to go or what to do during his temporary stay. As long as he brought his camera with him, he would follow wherever his steps would take him.  
  
This time, however, his steps surprisingly led him to a familiar place that he had started to remember by heart. By the time he arrived at the park, nobody was around, not even a single soul alive. He scanned his vicinity, letting out a weary sigh as he noticed the food stalls were still closed. The bikes that were usually parked near the old swings were absent. And what was more important, he couldn’t spot a particularly tiny guy anywhere.  
  
It was _too_ quiet. The only sound that he could hear was the sound of rustling leaves in the breeze. He decided to stroll around for a couple of minutes, adjusting himself to be engulfed in the unfamiliar scene.  
  
After a long while of just walking around, he felt his legs giving up on him. Exhausted, he sat himself on the park bench, wondering if Baekhyun would show up. He waited seconds after seconds, minutes after minutes, and after an hour when he had almost given up waiting, the sight of a petite figure clad in a heavy woolen coat and skinny jeans slowly came into view. God was actually kind enough to let them meet again.  
  
When Baekhyun was about to wave his hand at the man, he noticed him first – waving his hand a bit too faintly. He saw the smile adorned on Baekhyun’s face, and he returned it with a wider one as the other came approaching him.  
  
Invading the taller’s state of solitude, Baekhyun set himself to stand in front of him and asked, “How long have you been here?”  
  
“Not too long ago,” the taller lied. He couldn’t possibly say he had been waiting–hoping for the other to come even though he didn’t have any slightest idea if he would actually come.  
  
He gestured to the man standing before him to sit on the vacant space next to him.  
  
“You look quite gloomy today.” Chanyeol pointed out as he observed the other, “What happened? Is something bothering you?” a look of concern plastered on his face.  
  
Baekhyun shifted in his seat. Instead of replying to the other’s inquiry, he leaned his back deeper against the wooden bench, heaving a sigh. Chanyeol was expecting him to answer his questions – presuming he could somehow give him comfort if ever he felt down. His hands folded before his chest, eyes looking up at the blue sky, “Nice weather, isn’t it?”  
  
Arching an eyebrow, the taller replied as he tightened the jacket hugging his torso, “I would say it’s nice if it didn’t make me freeze.”  
  
Baekhyun smiled lightly, “You’re right. But I still think it’s nice. At least the sun still feels warm in the air. Usually, it could be much worse this time around.” Looking down, he kicked the pebbles playfully under his feet. Chanyeol only nodded in agreement.  
  
He wanted to ask many things about the man sitting next to him, but he restrained. Baekhyun’s attempt in quickly changing the topic proved that he didn’t want to talk further about his day when he asked what happened. He doubted if he would reply to his questions if he were to ask him things that were too private to share to a mere stranger. For a moment, an awkward silence yet again started to build between them. It was too quiet, but Chanyeol didn’t know _how_ to break it. He wanted to facepalm himself – embarrassed because he was sure Baekhyun must find him quiet and boring.  
  
"Since when have you been a photographer?" Baekhyun questioned out of the blue, blurting out anything that came to his mind before he ran out of stuff to say.  
  
“Now you’re curious about my job?” the giant chuckled nervously.  
  
The other nodded, expecting him to answer the question.  
  
"Well.. I guess it started when I was in high school. I used to join the school committee, and whenever there was an event, I partook in documentation. You know how it works, right?”  
  
“About school committee and all? Of course. Do I look like some nerd who only spends time in library?”  
  
“Alright, alright. I was just asking.” He grinned before he continued, “Not to be narcissistic, but I didn't realize I took good pictures until my friends pointed out so," Chanyeol shifted a bit, tilting his face slightly only to find Baekhyun staring at him with pure admiration. "They said my images show emotion. Not that I understood what they meant back then, but as I kept taking pictures, I discovered the sole reason why I enjoy doing this."  
  
"And what is that?" Baekhyun asked.  
  
"Well, one of the perks is getting to explore places. I get to move from one place to another, encounter different people, and make new friends. Along the way, I learn how to be more emphatic in life." Grinning from ear to ear, the taller finished his explanation.  
  
“That’s interesting. Do you always make friends with your subject or people that you encounter on the street? I wonder why you had to sneak a chance to take a picture of me if you could just ask me nicely to model for you.”  
  
“That’s not how it works, Baekhyun- _ssi_. I’m a street photographer. And the pictures that I take would turn out much better if they aren’t staged. It has to be natural, and because it has to be that way, I’m somehow required to be furtive. I show the people in my images my gratitude when I feel satisfied with the result. Sometimes I bow my head, and sometimes I tell them personally if the pictures turn out really great.”  
  
“So you don’t ask people to model for you but you take benefit from them?”  
  
“That’s just the way it is.” He punctuated his reply with a shrug.  
  
Baekhyun asked a few more questions related to photography, and Chanyeol answered accordingly. He could feel that Chanyeol was being genuine about his answer. He was passionate, and Baekhyun could tell just how much the taller loved his profession.  
  
“So how do you pick your subject?” the shorter asked curiously.  
  
"My subject is always random but there's always something going on in the frame.”  
  
The taller stopped talking as he sported a quick glance at his partner of speaking, “You could say my picture is alive. It's not just mere pictures without a story to tell."  
  
"That's so impressive." a hint of admiration obviously sparked on Baekhyun's countenance as the other elaborated his answer.  
  
"Have you ever thought of becoming a professional photographer?"  
  
Folding his arms before his chest, he pretended to think hard, knitting his brows and pondering the question with gravity before he tilted his head to look at Baekhyun, “I don’t know,” quickly followed by a rhetorical question, "Aren't I already one?"  
  
A soft laughter came followed. Baekhyun brought his fist to cover his mouth from giggling before he proposed to the taller, "I’d like to justify it myself."  
  
Baekhyun then promptly stretched his open palm before the taller as if waiting for something to be given to him.  
  
“What?”  
  
"Let me take a look at some of your pictures.”  
  
With hesitance, Chanyeol then brought his camera to his chest level, agreeing to let the other see what were stored in his camera, “Okay.”  
  
He clicked the button to show his gallery and scrolled down to the oldest pictures he had kept in his memory card. There were thousands of pictures that he had captured so far. Most of them were stored in his laptop, but he kept those that were memorable and important to him.  
  
"Look here, this was taken when I volunteered for my campus event.” He gestured the other to look at the small screen. It was a picture of a jam-packed crowd moshing in the spacious hall. Chanyeol’s face turned into an enthusiastic storyteller as he continued, “It was terrific! I’m not really into EDM, but the event was to die for! Too bad I didn’t know the title of the songs they played.”  
  
Baekhyun’s lips curved into a crescent shape as he listened to the taller’s story. Chanyeol opened up another picture. This time, a picture of a woman in her casual outfit with her arm linked with her lover’s that looked a decade older than she was appeared. They looked so in love like it didn’t matter what people would think of them as long as they were together. It was intriguing how a simple action could turn out surprisingly impressive in Chanyeol’s lens.  
  
Baekhyun leaned closer to look at other pictures, observing anything that needed to be observed as Chanyeol reviewed each of his photographs. He was too absorbed that he didn’t realize his close proximity with the other, their heads touching slightly as they looked at the screen. Too close that it made Chanyeol’s heart beat a second faster in his ribcage. He could clearly see Baekhyun’s eyelashes flutter, his eyelids blinking now and then.  
  
Still immersed in appreciating each picture he had seen, Baekhyun looked up when he was about to ask Chanyeol a question. What he didn’t expect was to meet the other’s warm orbs so close to him. He looked away instantly, averting his gaze to look at his feet instead of facing Chanyeol.  
  
As if oblivious to the situation that had just happened, Chanyeol turned off his camera and scooted closer to Baekhyun, “So what do you think? Am I professional enough for your tastes?” he inquired coolly, internally hoping that the rapid beating of his heart wouldn’t be loud enough for the other to hear.  
  
Baekhyun cleared his throat, “Y-yeah. Your shoots are great and honest – flawless even.”  
  
Having been complemented by the other, Chanyeol smiled bashfully–too wide that it could probably hurt his cheeks, “Told you.”  
  
“Did you take classes?”  
  
“Yeah. I enrolled myself in a photography school because I wanted to be one. A photographer, I mean.”  
  
There was a deafening silence that stretched after Chanyeol uttered his reply and Baekhyun only gave a light nod in response. Both of them probably had run out of ideas on what to talk about anymore. The air seemed to thicken between them and Chanyeol noticed how Baekhyun began to lightly shiver, keeping his hands warm hands in his pockets due to the bitter coldness that had been trying to engulf them.  
  
“Are you cold?” the taller asked before offering him a hot-pack that he had fetched beforehand in his pocket, “Hold this.”  
  
“I’m fine.” The other replied, blowing warm air on his hands and rubbed them together as though it would make a difference. “Wanna take a walk around the park?” Baekhyun stood up, gesturing the taller to follow suit.  
  
“Of course.”  
  
Despite the coldness, they spent the rest of the morning walking around the neighborhood near the park with their hands kept in their jacket pockets. They walked slowly as they conversed with each other; the cold air didn’t seem like much of a bother to them. During the walk, Chanyeol learned that Baekhyun was not as reserved as he thought. He was full of stories, and Chanyeol was more than excited listening to each of his experiences. Living in a countryside didn’t make the other less knowledgeable either as it was easy for him to voice out his thoughts and opinions about anything that happened around them at the moment. Once in a while, Baekhyun also laughed over his lame jokes when he tried to insert them in between their conversation. They bonded quickly and became much less likely to experience awkward silences.  
  
“Hey, this suddenly crossed my mind, but what do you say if I take you around the town? Get to know the area?” Baekhyun asked in the middle of their conversation. Chanyeol pulled a quizzical look on his face. He wasn’t sure if he heard it right – that Baekhyun was offering his time to a stranger, so he waited for the other to explain further.  
  
“I mean, if you ever need company during your stay here, I’d be glad to show you around. Judging by the pictures you’ve taken so far, it’s obvious there are so many places you haven’t visited.”  
  
To say that Chanyeol wasn’t thrilled would be the biggest lie of the century. He had been itching to ask the other to accompany him in exploring the town, but he didn’t get the chance yet (or more like he didn’t have guts to ask). He couldn’t even hold a proper conversation with the other in the beginning, let alone ask him for a favor. So when Baekhyun voluntarily offered to show him around the town, there was no way Chanyeol could decline.  
  
“Of course,” the taller replied, frantically nodding his head in agreement. “I mean if you’re free, I’d be glad to have you around.”  
  
“I actually have too much free time. My job doesn’t really require me to sit for hours every day. I only write when I get inspired.”  
  
“Is it promising? Your job?”  
  
“My life is well-maintained as it is.”  
  
“I guess being a writer has its own perks too.”  
  
“Of course. You’d be surprised when I tell you about it.”  
  
“Let’s meet at the park tomorrow morning, then?”  
  
“Okay. Tomorrow it is.”  


***

  
  
It was a beautiful morning when Chanyeol met Baekhyun again for the umpteenth time. The sun had not yet thoroughly warmed the air, and the pleasant breeze was refreshing. The birds twittered to each other, eagerly replacing the cicadas in the forgotten heat of the previous night. The grass still glimmered wetly from where drops of dew lay scattered about, catching the sun’s light. The humidity from earlier that week had finally disappeared with the recent rain showers.  
  
By the time Chanyeol arrived at the park, Baekhyun had already been waiting for him. He was dressed casually in a blue sweater and black long coat – the fabric was enough to accommodate him with much needed warmth. Chanyeol took a glance at him and decided that the other looked attractive without makeup to cover his face. Not that he had been wearing makeup all this time as he remembered, but Chanyeol might’ve once thought he put on some on their first encounter because the other looked too ethereal to be natural.  
  
They exchanged greetings for a moment and conversed about how their sleep was like awkward puppies. There wasn’t much to tell, so they fell into a hush before Baekhyun cleared his throat – breaking the silence between them, “So, I have some places in mind.”  
  
Chanyeol beamed at him, “That’s great! Can’t wait to visit them all.”  
  
At some point, he still found it hard to believe that the other would really offer his company for him. He must have other activities to do or duties to carry, but there he was, standing before him like he didn’t have anything else to worry about. He looked rather elated to start an adventure with him.  
  
“Yeah. I don’t know what kind of environment that you enjoy the most, but for a starter, there’s this one place that I like to visit often.”  
  
“Let’s go there.” Chanyeol couldn’t hide his excitement. His pupils were dilating if it was any of indication. His smile was wide, showing a perfect set of white teeth. He was already prepared to roam around the town, his camera hanging around his neck.  
  
Baekhyun smiled at the sight, “Okay. Let’s go!”  
  
“Is it far?” Chanyeol asked as he walked beside the brunet.  
  
“Not really. I’ll lead the way.”  
  
Baekhyun took initiative to walk before Chanyeol like a tour guide he was. Chanyeol thought it would be awkward for the both of them to walk side by side since he didn’t have anything to talk about, so he trailed behind the shorter instead. Promptly lowering the camera that he had raised to his eye level, he captured the view in front of him; the back of the other’s delicate figure walking in the middle of an empty pedestrian walk immediately caught in his lens. Once in a while, Baekhyun slightly tilted his head to the side to randomly check the store or restaurant he passed by, allowing Chanyeol to get a clear view of his side figure. He was once again entranced by how _ethereal_ the other looked in his camera. His delicate features, his remarkably rosy lips, his angular yet slim frame. Chanyeol was sure Baekhyun was lacking of imperfection. And since the first time he laid eyes on him, he had somehow become his inspiration, and he _began_ to occupy more space in Chanyeol’s camera.  
  
Baekhyun might not notice this, but Chanyeol had been secretly taking his picture without his consent. He just couldn’t help it. He had never felt so much entranced by how beautiful someone can look in his lens. And Baekhyun was beautiful. He was beautiful in each gesture he imposed. He was no supermodel, and heads didn’t turn when he passed in the street. In the middle of empty pathway, Baekhyun was walking – his back facing Chanyeol. And when other things around him seemed bleak and weary, he was the _brightest_. He was an extraordinary _thing_ that captured Chanyeol’s attention as his gaze was fully gravitated toward him through his viewfinder. The more he was exposed to it, the more he learned about him. That attraction might bloom into something more, but for the time being, Chanyeol would like to think of it as an admiration.  
  
“Do you wanna keep walking behind me?”  
  
Startled, Chanyeol put down his camera and let it hang on his chest as he caught the sight of the other talking to him, “W-what?”  
  
“Why do you keep walking behind me? Now other people would think I’m your tour guide or something.”  
  
“Oh,” Chanyeol let out a small chuckle, “I just don’t wanna make you feel uncomfortable.”  
  
“I get it. But it’s fine, really. You make me feel more uncomfortable if you walk behind me like that,” Baekhyun walked a few steps backwards and pulled the other by the wrist. Chanyeol didn’t resist and just let himself get pulled. They were now walking side by side.  
  
“Now we look more like friends.” Baekhyun said.  
  
They didn’t talk much during the walk, mostly because Chanyeol didn’t know what to ask. Talking was Chanyeol’s specialty. When he was in high school, he was called a social butterfly, and he lived up to his name. He made a lot of friends. He couldn’t understand why he became timid whenever Baekhyun was around. Chanyeol’s gaze shifted from the high way to the faces of pedestrians strolling around, to the opens shops, to the restaurants luring people with their warmth.  
  
After almost twenty minutes of walking down an unfamiliar path, they reached their destination. They climbed up the not-so-steep hill, and when they reached the top, the wind blew rather harshly, and it felt bitter against his skin. Chanyeol didn’t regret wasting his energy coming up there because he could see the sight of scenery under the hill. It wasn’t as captivating as the sight that he once saw in Namsan Tower, but he could clearly see the view of the town from above the hill.  
  
The hill itself was actually oddly shaped with steep slopes and flat plains, but it had pathways and stairs built by the villagers. On top, the ground was clothed in pebbles and scrubby grass, and there was a big tree with autumn l eaves hanging on it that looked magnificent in the luminous sunshine.  
  
Standing on the edge of the hill on a wooden platform that jutted out approximately two feet from the hill was Baekhyun with his satisfied expression, inhaling the fresh air, “What a great view.”  
  
“Yeah, it’s really nice.”  
  
When the other was not aware, Chanyeol took his chance to sneakily snap a picture of him. He was being extra careful so that the other wouldn’t notice. Smiling to himself when he got nice results, he approached Baekhyun who was leaning against the wooden fence.  
  
“Do you visit this place often?”  
  
Keeping his gaze fixated on the faraway mountains that seemed smaller than his palm, he replied, “I used to.”  
  
“But not many people come up here. I wonder how you even managed to find this place.” Chanyeol pointed out while busying himself to capture the view before him. He had never been a fan of nature, to be honest, but indulging himself in its primitive luxuries by continuously shuttering his camera button to take multiple pictures was not that bad of an idea.  
  
“I love to explore places too, you know, just like you. I know this town like it’s the back of my hand.”  
  
“Did you grow up here?” Chanyeol asked out of curiousity.  
  
“Yeah. I’ve spent my entire life here since I was born until now.”  
  
“You’ve never been to any other cities before?”  
  
“I’ve been to Gyeongju and Busan but it was a long time ago. I’ve never been to Seoul, though.”  
  
“You’re lying.” Chanyeol suddenly felt more interested to listen to whatever the other male had to say, so he let his camera hang before his chest and scooted closer to Baekhyun.  
  
“For real,” the gaze he shot toward the taller was genuine, and Chanyeol had no reason not to believe him, “I’ve always wanted to go there, but- I don’t know. I just haven’t got the chance yet.”  
  
“Wow. I’ve never met someone who hasn’t been to Seoul. You’re the first.”  
  
Baekhyun only chuckled softly. “What is it like in Seoul, though? How do you live there? Tell me so I can imagine.”  
  
“Well, Seoul is… many things. I can’t describe it with just one word. The city never sleeps. I’m sure you must know it already. People seem to always have errands at day and night. It’s much more alive compared to this town.”  
  
“It’s pretty boring here, isn’t it?” Baekhyun asked confidently.  
  
“No, no, I like it here too. It’s really calm, and the air is fresh, far from being polluted,” he said and took a deep breath as if to prove he wasn’t lying before looking back at him with fondness in his smile, “The air is even fresher here.”  
  
“You think so?” And Chanyeol nodded.  
  
“How about the people there? Are they nice? Are they friendly?”  
  
“I can’t generalize, but we tend to be individualistic. In subway or other public places, people are paying more attention to their phones than the people around them. They don’t particularly stick their nose into other people’s problems too. We just help each other when we need each other.”  
  
“I see. I find no harm in being an individualist. Don’t we all enjoy the solitude? Some people find comfort in it. Do you identify yourself as one of them?”  
  
Chanyeol let out a small chuckle before he replied, “I don’t think so. You see, I’m a street photographer here. I’m aware of what is happening around me."  
  
“You’re right.”  
  
“But I don’t stick my nose into someone’s problems. That much is true.”  
  
Nodding in acknowledgement, Baekhyun distanced himself from Chanyeol and shuffled to the other side of the fence. Each of his footsteps against the wood surface created a strident sound echoing in the air. He tapped his fingers on the fence, staring into the picturesque landscape before him as he hummed a melodious tone of a song Chanyeol didn’t recognize.  
  
“Chanyeol, can you take a picture of me?”  
  
“Of course. Wait.” Chanyeol then walked up to him, but not exactly approaching. They were a few meters away, and when Baekhyun was occupied on deciding what kind of pose he should do, Chanyeol was preparing his camera before it was all set. He was aiming to snap a picture of his side figure.  
  
“Ready?” Chanyeol asked. “Pretend I’m not here and act as natural as you can.”  
  
Baekhyun complied as he tried posing candidly. He had his head tilted up slightly and his unfazed gaze was casted to a numerous clouds heaped in chaotic ways scattering and moving constantly in the sky. Behind him stood a giant maple tree, its sturdy branches dangling on each side. Before Chanyeol had a chance to press the shutter button, Baekhyun had already moved from his previous position, shaking his head relentlessly, “I can’t do it. I can’t act as if you weren’t there. I’m not a model. Just take a picture of me standing next to the tree while smiling at the camera, alright?”  
  
“Okay.” Chanyeol blinked his eyes as he averted his focus to the shorter male, “If that’s what you want.”  
  
Without hesitation, Baekhyun jogged closer to the tree and set himself to stand next to it. He had his lips curved up a little, letting his arms fall down on each side of his body the first time Chanyeol snapped him. His lips tugged up even wider, showing his row of teeth the second time he was photographed as he leaned his head to the right to where the tree was standing still. Rather than looking ethereal like he had always been a couple of times Chanyeol had seen him through his camera lens, Baekhyun looked adorable when he smiled at him this time. He looked so young and carefree like there weren’t any burden weighing on his shoulders.  
  
Baekhyun approached him when it was safe to assume that Chanyeol was done with shooting him.  
  
“Can I see the results?” he asked. Chanyeol then let him come a few inches closer, allowing him to take a look at the results. They reviewed the photographs for a couple of moments, and Chanyeol could hear Baekhyun complain about his look that he thought was too enthusiastic if his delighted face was any of indication. When a snapshot of smiling Baekhyun appeared looking up at him, Chanyeol said, “You look like an excited pup. It’s cute.”  
  
Baekhyun shouldn’t have lit up a smile when he said that. _Cute?_ He couldn’t help but take it as a compliment. “Really?”  
  
“Yeah. I’m serious.” Chanyeol had to look away from him to avoid eye contact. He hoped the compliment didn’t come across like a flirt because he was being sincere.  
  
“I’m not used to people calling me cute but, um, thanks.”  
  
When Chanyeol was gazing back to his camera screen to delete some of the pictures that turned out blurry, Baekhyun beamed, “Hey, do you want me to take a picture of you?”  
  
“No, thanks. I don’t like getting pictures taken of myself. It feels weird.”  
  
“Loosen up a little, would you? You have loads of picture of other people you don’t even know. It’s only fair if you keep some of you in the pictures.”  
  
“But-“  
  
“No buts! Go there and let me handle this.” he took hold of the strap in his hand, gesturing Chanyeol to bend a little forward so that Baekhyun could completely remove the camera from where it had been hanging.  
  
Baekhyun jogged back as he commanded Chanyeol to quickly decide on a pose he should be making. He raised the camera to his eye level and aimed the lens at the taller figure before him. As he located his index on a button poking out from the top, he adjusted the zoom ring to capture more of Chanyeol in the picture, making the background a bit blurry. He had enough knowledge to operate the object in his hand even though it was satisfyingly heavy in his hand. He clicked the button continuously without letting the other know when to pose.  
  
“Are you done?” Chanyeol’s deep voice boomed in the air as he spoke.  
  
“Here. I’m sorry if it turned out bad.” Baekhyun said as he handed over his camera.  
  
Skimming through a couple of pictures of himself with almost the same pose in each, he voiced out his thought, “I look like a squid.”  
  
Baekhyun then started giggling with his poker straight mouth twitched upwards. He covered his mouth with his palm as if to prevent himself from laughing further.  
  
“Why? You look great.”  
  
“I know you’re lying. I look so lanky in this picture with my long arms almost touching the ground.” Chanyeol said with a huff before making a thin line with his lips.  
  
“You’re exaggerating.” A wave of laughter came freely from Baekhyun’s mouth. His chest made a great shaking motion as he laughed and his face muscles grew tight.  
  
They got carried away in their conversation for the next couple of minutes. Before they went back home, they posed together for a selfie with the view of blue sky and faraway mountains behind them. Baekhyun was slightly pursing his lips as he leaned on Chanyeol’s shoulder but not exactly resting his head on it. Chanyeol had his arms draped over his shoulders – raising his fingers to make a V-sign while his other hand was holding a smartphone in the air. He could feel other flinch at the sudden contact. Before he grazed his thumb on the screen, he looked down to his left and asked, “Does it make you feel uncomfortable? Sorry.”  
  
“No, no, it’s fine. I was just… taken aback. Yeah. Taken aback, I guess.” The brunet replied and smiled awkwardly.  
  
“Okay. I’ll press the button in 3, 2, cheese!”  
  
And so Baekhyun smiled after the cue, and a number of their photographs with almost the same pose were made as a reminder that they have been there.  


***

  
  
Baekhyun went back home contented and his heart rapidly beating. He was _happy_. It had been quite some time since he had his heart pounding as if it was about to rip his chest open. He could feel butterflies dancing and twirling around in circles in his stomach. And really, he _shouldn’t_ have felt that way. Not when he had somebody waiting for him at home. But he couldn’t help it. The thought of having befriended someone after a long time made his stomach queasy, and when he recalled the moment Chanyeol put his hands on his nape, he had a sudden urge to do somersaults right at that moment.  
  
Baekhyun had been walking for too long and lost in his thought that he didn’t realize he had already reached his doorstep. He pushed the thoughts of Chanyeol to the back of his mind because the reality was about to knock his sense back into him. Hesitant, he cracked the door open only to be faced by a familiar figure clad in pajamas.  
  
“You came? Where have you been that you couldn’t even answer my phone calls?” A voice echoed in the room, stern and hoarse. The owner of the voice trudged past him and plopped himself on the sofa. He turned on the television and changed the channels as he waited for Baekhyun to reply.  
  
Baekhyun shrugged off his coat, hanging it somewhere on the coat stand and placed his notebook on top of a drawer next to it, “Went out to meet my friend.”  
  
“Is that so? Go get changed and rest. You must be tired.” Sehun’s voice was laced with nothing but seriousness.  
  
Feeling dejected and utterly exhausted, Baekhyun paced toward where his husband was sitting. Before he could set himself on the couch next to him, the taller had stood up – intent on leaving him alone sitting in the living room.  
  
“Aren’t you going to ask how my day was?” He was staring up into the taller’s eyes, but his eyes were empty. It seemed like he was being avoided. He wondered how they became distant with each other. Baekhyun felt as if Sehun was out of reach. He pretended to be happy and all bubbly in front of his husband, but the fact was that he _wasn’t_. He was unhappy because Sehun was never there when he needed him. He felt as though Sehun was in a different world. Like they were separated by a huge wall, far away from where he was actually standing before him. He barely came home, and when he came, it was as if Baekhyun didn’t exist at all to him.  
  
“Are you tired?” Baekhyun questioned and he stood up before him.  
  
“Yeah. Sorry. My head is a bit dizzy after a flight.”  
  
“It’s okay,” Baekhyun caressed his lithe fingers against Sehun’s temple, his other hand wrapped around his waist, “Have you eaten yet?”  
  
“No, but I’m not hungry. I’m gonna get changed and get some rest.” With a light push, Sehun freed himself out of the smaller’s embrace.  
  
“Just rest well for tonight. You didn’t have to wait for me, though. We can talk and catch up tomorrow morning, okay? I’ll follow you in a bit,” Baekhyun unwillingly let him go and placed a peck on his temple.  
  
Sehun nodded and lit up a smile on his face. Baekhyun squeezed the taller’s arm before letting him make his way towards the stairs. After a moment, Baekhyun could hear the sound of the bedroom door being quietly slammed shut.  
  
The air was probably chilly outside, and for Baekhyun, it wasn’t any different inside. That night, he had dinner alone; just like any other nights he had spent. He was home, but rather than feeling warm, his body was engulfed in the coldness of Sehun’s action.  


***

  
  
“Morning. You’re up early.” Baekhyun exclaimed as he heard Sehun’s footsteps echoing in the room. Smiling brightly, he walked over to his husband and planted a quick peck on his cheek. Sehun purred under his touch, humming something the other couldn’t even catch.  
  
“What are you doing so early in the morning?” Sehun finally asked in a more proper articulation, heading towards the dining table.  
  
“I’m making breakfast for you.” Baekhyun replied just after he turned on the stove. He wasn’t much of a cook, but he knew how to prepare a simple but healthy breakfast. He checked the one of the shelves, but there wasn’t any food materials left except a stack of instant noodles there.  
  
“But the last time I checked, we don’t have anything.” Sehun announced as he turned to look at Baekhyun, “Tell me, Baek, have you been eating instant noodles all this time?”  
  
“Guess I haven’t had much time to buy groceries. Besides, there’s nothing much to buy since I’m only living by myself.” There was a tone of sarcasm in Baekhyun’s reply. He took a jug of water and poured some into a glass, trying to avoid Sehun’s gaze.  
  
Sehun could feel a pang of guilt in his chest due to hearing Baekhyun’s reply. He knew he was the one to blame for having so little time for his husband, but hearing such words coming from his mouth made him feel worse than he already did.  
  
“Baekhyun, I’m sorry.” Sehun hugged the petite guy from behind as he pleaded for an apology. He took Baekhyun’s hand in his and squeezed it gently.  
  
It was when he turned five years old when his mother took him overseas. He was just a lost boy without a dream, but when he got on an airplane for the first time, he told himself that he wanted to grow up to be a pilot and take passengers flying above the sky. He simply thought it was cool to fly a huge aircraft in between clouds.  
  
Little did he know there was more to the role than just flying the plane.  
  
When Sehun grew up to be a fine handsome teenager, he didn’t get into the best high school in town, but he managed to establish a good life throughout his years in high school. He made friends with a lot of people. He hung out with them, and he joined school competition in sports. Though he was into studying 24/7 to pursue his dream, sport was like a remedy to him. His favorite sport was swimming. He loved how the water could give him so much of comfort, and it made him feel safe for some reason. He wasn’t really much of a social butterfly who needed only little effort to blend with people. He got around well with people, and it was like his specialty.  
  
It was also in high school when he met Baekhyun. It was the second year, as he could recall, when Baekhyun accidentally dropped a book onto his leg when he was taking a nap in the library. A loud thud startled him, but instead of getting angry at the one who disturbed his nap, he was welcomed by warm orbs staring down at him in between a pile of books. The guy kept apologizing but Sehun couldn’t bring himself to stay focused, so when the guy was about to turn back, he asked for his name, but instead of telling him his name, the man bowed and ran away.  
  
It turned out that the shy boy was a transfer student and he happened to be in the same class as Sehun. Since then, Sehun had always been the one seeking for Baekhyun’s attention. He asked him to eat lunch together, finish the homework together, and was always bold about his inner feelings. Until one day, Sehun had guts to ask Baekhyun out on a date.  
  
“You know I can’t quit my job.” Sehun pointed out abruptly.  
  
“I know, Sehun. I’m not asking you to quit your job, though. But I just –”  
  
“You know I’ve always wanted to be a pilot,” Sehun enveloped Baekhyun in his hug even tighter, “We agreed on this from the beginning. You’re not disappointed with me, are you?”  
  
Baekhyun closed his eyes and tried to absorb the warmth from Sehun’s body. For some reason, his embrace was not as warm as it used to. It couldn’t provide him with comfort; it felt as if the warmth had faded within the air.  
  
“No,” _He lied._ Baekhyun sighed into his chest as he mumbled, “I’m not.” _Another lie._  
  
Truth to be told, Baekhyun was always supportive of Sehun’s dream of flying. Ever since they started dating, his husband had continuously convinced him that he wouldn’t put him in a difficult situation. And they also talked over the consequences they might have to face if they ever got married and became husbands.  
  
Three years into their marriage, and Sehun had spent over 21.000 hours in the sky, which equates to nearly two years and a half. He missed two Christmases. He couldn’t make it to come home for Baekhyun’s birthday in two consecutive years. It was only natural for him to lie whenever Sehun asked whether he was doing just fine. He wouldn’t want to make the other feel guilty for prioritizing his career over his marriage.  
  
At first, the longing was bearable, and whenever his husband didn’t come for a few days, Baekhyun would try to forget how painful it actually was for him to carry on and make himself busy by going to the park and write. Baekhyun thought it was unfair that his husband was living his dream, yet he was the one feeling lonely and deserted.  
  
Baekhyun didn’t know how he actually felt towards the latter anymore. Sehun was kind – the kindest human being on earth he could ever possibly ask for. At least, that was what he thought. He showered him with so much love and warmth, but Baekhyun was greedy. He was the one to blame because he wanted Sehun all to himself. He was greedy of his love and attention. Yet he couldn’t give it all to Baekhyun. Not anymore.  
  
“Sehun, when is your next flight?” Baekhyun enquired.  
  
“Tomorrow.”  
  
“Oh. Do you think we could go out today and watch some movies? Or we could go to an amusement park and eat cotton candy throughout the rides. That’ll be fun.” Baekhyun proposed, trying to sound as gleeful as possible.  
  
Sehun stayed still for a few moment, thinking, “Movie sounds good.”  
  
“Okay! Then it’s decided. We’re going to go on a date like normal couple out there and watch a movie.” Sehun nodded and forced a smile at the latter. Baekhyun didn’t deserve that. He deserved a sincere smile. A sincere smile from someone who would be by his side every single day and give him endless love and affection, but Sehun started to doubt if he would ever become that person for him.  


***

  
  
They were in the middle of a crowd lining up to buy a ticket for the movie they were going to watch. Some of them were couples, some of them were a group of excited teenagers. There weren’t many choices of movies to watch, but before they arrived, Sehun and Baekhyun had agreed to watch something light so they decided on a romance movie. Sehun purchased tickets for two and took the change. They bought a bucket of popcorn and two colas. That was enough to keep them stuffed during the movie.  
  
Most of the time Sehun took Baekhyun’s hands in his and intertwined their fingers. Baekhyun didn’t refuse. He couldn’t quite remember the last time Sehun took him on a date because he’d always been busy and caught up in his work.  
  
The trail to the theatre was rather dark that they couldn’t see anything in front of them, but Sehun led the way nonetheless. The dim light on the both sides of the walls was the only source of light that illuminated the spacious theatre, so it made them a little bit easier to find their seat number.  
  
They were both thankful because the movie hadn’t started yet when they were seated. When the movie was about to start, Sehun’s cellphone rang, indicating that there was an incoming call. Sehun excused himself to take the call, and Baekhyun nodded.  
  
Sehun placed his phone to his ear. Baekhyun watched as his husband’s face turned sour due to the talk, telling the person on the oher line that he was outside with his husband.  
  
“What happened? Baekhyun asked when Sehun had sat down on his seat again.  
  
“There’s an emergency. A co-pillot who was supposed to be in charge today got into a car accident just now, and they called me for substitution.” The look of worry was plastered on his husband’s face.  
  
Baekhyun sighed. He shifted his gaze towards a huge screen on the wall in front of them. When Sehun was about to say something, Baekhyun interrupted, “Do you have to go?”  
  
“I think so.” Sehun took Baekhyun’s hand and squeeze it gently, “Baekhyun, I’m sorry. Will you be okay?” _I’m not okay._ “I’m okay.” Baekhyun lied. His lips trembled.  
  
“I’ll be going.” _Please don’t go_.  
  
“Yeah, you should go.” Baekhyun didn’t dare to look at his husband, eyes focusing on the screen. “I had come all the way home just to meet you but in the end, I had to leave you in the middle of our date. I’m such an irresponsible husband. I’ll make it up to you. I swear.”  
  
Sehun had never been like that. Baekhyun always came first before he became a pilot. He would always put Baekhyun before anything, and Baekhyun liked to be treated that way. He knew he was childish and he should just grow up already and have more conscience before everything fell apart, but he was selfish and he wanted his husband’s attention all to himself.  
  
“I’m going,” Sehun gave Baekhyun a small peck on the lips before he exited the theatre.  
  
The movie hadn’t yet ended, but he wanted to get out of there as soon as possible. He didn’t want to know whether the main character died or had a happy ending. If somebody were to ask him about the movie, he would make up a story that was probably far from the actual story.  
  
Baekhyun took a deep breath as he exited the theater building. He dragged his feet forward. He had no idea where to go or what to do. The sky was blue above him, and it was covered in wispy clouds. He kept his hands hidden inside of his pockets as the autumn breeze hit his skin. It was then he realized he was walking in a direction to the park where he mostly spent his time at. Come to think of it, Baekhyun realized he had spent more of his time much longer in this park than with his husband ever since they got married. He didn’t remember the last time he spent a quality time with his husband.  


***

  
  
As days turned into weeks, it had become a habit for the photographer to visit the park day after day. They had come to an agreement that Baekhyun would take him to different places in town every day except weekends. So he went to many places with Baekhyun guiding him through streets with his genuine smile. Baekhyun didn’t ask for anything in return, but Chanyeol wanted to give him something. And the only thing he could offer to him was his pure kindness and attention in a form of lunch or dinner treat.  
  
It was safe for him to assume that they had become friends since the day Baekhyun showed him around. Even though it might have started awkward, Chanyeol had learned how to handle the anxiety that crept under his skin when Baekhyun was around and act as natural as he could be around him. Their conversation was not as awkward as it used to be during their first few encounters, and they had overcome the obvious “getting to know you” kind of chat. It just kind of happened that their conversation began to flow like it did between friends.  
  
Baekhyun was sure attractive – physically and emotionally. He had a physical appearance that Chanyeol thought was too stunning for someone who lived in the countryside. He had milky white skin and a slim figure that made him look tinier than a lot of men he knew in his life. His facial features were also too soft for a man, and his fingers were too dainty to be used only for writing or typing words. With all them combined, he was sure the petite guy could maintain a much more promising life in Seoul as a model or some sort.  
  
Chanyeol liked being around the other because they shared a couple of same interests. He also found out that the other had an emotional attachment toward puppies just like he did. Chanyeol learned that Baekhyun liked the color of the sky, a bright shade of blue. He liked the smell of soil when it rained. He preferred his coffee without cream. And he liked brown. Chanyeol, too, liked brown because that was the color of Baekhyun’s eyes.  
  
Chanyeol also found himself falling a little more in love with him whenever he heard him giggling through his nose, snorting adorably over his lame jokes. The sound of his giggle, Chanyeol thought was like a brook flowing merrily through a well-lit wood. His laugh was like a waterfall. And Chanyeol was intent on keeping him close to him, so that he could hear him laughing every day.  
  
Even though Baekhyun talked a lot, he had never really opened up about himself no matter how much Chanyeol had tried to dig into his life. The other could always find a way to untangle himself from the train of questions the younger had asked him. He was secretive about his personal life and relationship. But Chanyel managed to find out that the other was actually older than him by five years. He couldn’t believe he had been deceived all this time. One day, when Baekhyun asked him to call him _hyung_ , Chanyeol had to refuse politely because it was foreign for him to suddenly regard him as someone older than him. Ever since he discovered the truth about his age, Baekhyun liked to tease him a lot and treated him a bit too exaggeratingly.  
  
As for relationship, he supposed the other was not romantically involved with anyone at the moment. If he were – hypothetically speaking, in a relationship, he wouldn’t probably waste his time going out with someone younger than him. He wasn’t sure what the other might have felt toward him, but Chanyeol would like to believe that Baekhyun, too, was enjoying his company – as a friend or something more than that.  
  
On the other hand, Chanyeol also let Baekhyun learn that he had been living by himself in Seoul since he was in college. He came from a middle class family, and his parents lived in somewhere in Busan. They rarely visited Chanyeol because he didn’t let them do that. He didn’t want to put such a burden on them, so it was him who always visited his parents once in a few months, only to make sure that they were living a healthy life even without him. He told his parents that he could manage his life in the city and he proved it right. Two years working as a freelance photographer paid off. He could afford to rent an apartment, and he could spare half of his earning for his parents every month. His apartment was not spacious, but it was comfortable enough – at least that was what Chanyeol thought. There was only one bedroom with a king-sized bed, too spacious for a lonely person, but Chanyeol tended to move around a lot when he slept, so he preferred it to a single bed one. In the middle of the apartment, there was a small living room with a red medium sofa and a TV. There was also a kitchen with dining table and a kitchenette attached to the wall. Baekhyun beamed as Chanyeol told him all sorts of things about his life in Seoul. He told him with fondness in his eyes that he wanted to visit him in Seoul _someday_.  


***

  
  
Baekhyun plopped himself on the messy pile of sheets on the bed, sighing as he rested his head on the pillow. Staring at the ceiling, he inhaled and gathered the air into his cheeks, puffing. He released it, followed by a long frustrated sigh. He turned onto his stomach and glanced at the clock on the bedside table. It was already 11.30 pm, and there was still no sign of his husband coming. Sehun had promised to come home today. Baekhyun was thrilled when he heard the news because it had been a couple of days since his husband went home and left him all alone. It wasn’t like he felt hurt by his absence. Well, maybe he did. A little. But it seemed like he wasn’t feeling as lonely as before ever since he met Chanyeol and spent the time with him. His heart had managed to stay intact – beating rhythmically unlike a couple of weeks ago where it had almost shattered into pieces due to Sehun’s constant absence in his life.  
  
Baekhyun reached for his handphone lying silently on the bedside table. When his fingers were about to swipe open the screen, it flashed with _My Husband_ , followed by a ringtone.  
  
_“Hello? Baekhyun-ah?”_ a voice boomed from the other line.  
  
“Yes, Sehun. It’s me. How are you? How was work? Are you coming home today?”  
  
_“It was okay. I’m okay. But I’ve got another flight outside of my usual schedule. I don’t think I can make it today. I’ll probably be back home in two days.”_  
  
Baekhyun let out an exasperated sigh. Why didn’t Sehun just marry his work if he was going to spend most of his life flying an airplane?  
  
“It’s okay. Be safe on your work,” he replied, his voice sounded soft and hoarse. The line got cut before Sehun could utter another reply.  
  
The tears started to run slowly down his cheeks as he remembered his quality time with his husband. The memories stayed in his chamber of hearts because they were precious to him. But whenever Baekhyun played every piece of their memories in his mind projector, it was as if they were mocking him; it felt like the memories had been there to grab his heart and squeeze it hard until it became hard for him to breathe.  
  
He walked out of his room, shuffling about the spacious space that was the living room of his house toward the kitchen counter. He opened the shelf above the counter and took out a bottle of vodka. Pouring it into the glass, he gulped down his first sip – letting the familiar taste of liquid burning down in his throat. The feeling lingered before slowly fading away as he took the next sip. He was so used to drinking alone that the liquid had somewhat turned sour whenever he tasted it.  
  
He hated the reality. _His_ reality to be precise. He hated the fact that he was married to a fine man like Oh Sehun but was never happy. He hated the fact that he had everything – a house, a job, a husband, but he had never truly felt loved. His house had never felt like home. It had always been lack of affection and compassion due to his husband’s absence.  
  
He wanted to forget the state he was in and simply get himself drown in his own misery. He stared at his cellphone screen for a minute and decided to text someone. He went through his contact and stopped when the screen displayed names that began with C. Pondering hard whether or not it was appropriate to contact the man he had in mind at the moment, he hesitantly clicked on Chanyeol’s contact and texted him.  
  
_Are you free tomorrow? Do you wanna go somewhere? My treat._  
  
Taking a handful of hair in his palm, he sighed and let his arm slump and leaned his head against the table. He should have never texted him. He shouldn’t have heard what his heart wanted and let his logic decide what he should do and what he shouldn’t do. He knew he had to stay away from Chanyeol before things got too complicated, but instead of walking away from him, Baekhyun had found himself trapped in a predicament that would be impossible for him to escape.  


***

  
  
“Hey, Baek, tell me again why we need to visit this amusement park. I thought you agreed when I asked you to cook something and we could eat it at your house.” the photographer asked the man walking next to him as he scanned the area. He was thankful for the place was not crowded like it would probably be during weekends.  
  
“I don’t want you come to my house. It’s too messy.”  
  
“Okay. But why the amusement park? We could just walk around the park or go to a coffee shop.”  
  
“Well, we need something more challenging. Don’t you think? And besides, this is the place where I used to spend my time with my parents. It’s been a while since the last time I came here.”  
  
Tilting his head to the side, Chanyeol raised an eyebrow in a quizzical look as if asking the other just what _happened_ to them.  
  
“They’re no longer here now.” Baekhyun explained, his voice low and soft but still audible to hear.  
  
“Oh,” Chanyeol nodded his head, unable to think of any proper comment, “I’m sorry.”  
  
“You don’t need to. I didn’t bring that up on purpose. Actually, today is the seventh anniversary of their death.” The look on Baekhyun’s face was unreadable. There was fondness in the way he smiled, but Chanyeol could feel a hint of sadness hidden behind his eyes.  
  
“Do you miss them? Your parents?”  
  
“Not as much as I did in the first few years of their absence, but yes, I still miss them.”  
  
Chanyeol walked closer toward the brunet and in a matter of seconds, he enveloped him in a warm embrace. Drawing soothing circles on the brunet’s back, Chanyeol gave him a bit of reassurance talk, telling him that everything would be fine and that it was okay to miss his parents. Baekhyun felt safe and secure in his arms, but really, he shouldn’t have felt that way to begin with. He kept too many secrets from Chanyeol that he wasn’t sure he would be forgiven if Chanyeol ever found out about the truth.  
  
Chanyeol loosened his embrace and gripped Baekhyun by the shoulders, looking at him in the eyes, “You know what? We’re going to forget about everything and just have fun today!”  
  
Baekhyun nodded, his expression a mix of sheer excitement and enthusiasm.  
  
Resuming their pace toward the park, Chanyeol turned left into the main entrance. He halted and gasped in awe, “I didn't realize how big this place was!” he exclaimed.  
  
Baekhyun chuckled as he watched the taller running around in glee, hands stretched out wide in the air. Chanyeol paused at the ticket kiosk. "Don't we have to buy tickets?" He asked.  
  
Grabbing his hand, Baekhyun tagged Chanyeol along with him, "Nope. I paid for the tickets online." He waved two printed tickets in front of Chanyeol.  
  
Chanyeol grinned at him. "Look at you! You’ve been such a great company, and you’ve always come prepared. How should I repay your kindness, Byun Baekhyun?"  
  
The question hang in the air, unanswered as Baekhyun only smiled widely in response.  
  
It was a beautiful, sunny late fall morning, with just a hint of crispness to the air. There were a few fluffy white clouds floating in the bright blue sky; it almost looked like a postcard. After passing through the turnstiles, they walked under the rail line and past the main street. "Wow! This place is really huge,” Chanyeol commented.  
  
There was actually a stylized version of an old-time small-town main street, with colorful buildings housing gift shops, and gorgeous flowers everywhere. Large cartoon characters walked down the street, pausing to have their picture taken with a small hoard of children.  
  
Baekhyun couldn't help but grin at him. He knew he hadn't been all that excited to be visiting the amusement park, but now that he was here he hoped he would have fun. The weather was cooperating, and he'd looked on the internet, checking everything he could think of; trying to ensure a smooth visit. After all, he brought company with him, and he wouldn’t disappoint him in any way possible.  
  
"Okay, where to go first?" Chanyeol asked as he circled his arm around the older’s waist. He figured Baekhyun was sure to have a plan; he always did.  
  
"I figure we'll go counterclockwise. First stop, let’s try the Carousel! And, after that, we can prepare ourselves to ride on scary rides. We’ll start with a bang on Space Mountain. I’m so excited!" Baekhyun glanced at Chanyeol out of the corner of his eye, just to confirm his suspicion that his tongue would be poking out of the corner of his mouth – thinking of the said ride he’d just mentioned before.  
  
And it was. He was _so so_ cute with his brilliant hazel eyes and boyish smile as he sported a confused look.  
  
"Okay... What is Space Mountain, and why are we going to get a bang out of it?" He asked, knowing he would have all the answers, and would be longing to share them.  
  
"It's a steel roller coaster, _Yeol_.”  
  
_Wait, Yeol? How did that nickname even come out?_ Baekhyun wanted to palm his face in embarrassment. Peeking through his eyelashes, he noticed the taller only knitted his brows together – confused as to why he suddenly stopped in between his explanation. Maybe Chanyeol wasn’t even aware of the nickname that slipped through his mouth.  
  
Clearing his throat, he continued, “It was just rebuilt a few years ago. It's three thousand thirty five feet long, with a top speed of thirty miles an hour. The biggest drop is fifteen feet. But the best part is, since it's all indoors, and it's supposed to be in space. It’s in the dark. Cool, huh?"  
  
Chanyeol felt his palms start to sweat and rubbed them against his jeans. "Yeah, cool."  
  
“By the way, I like it. When you called me Yeol. That sounded cute coming from you.”  
  
Luckily, the line was moving pretty quick and he didn't have very much time to worry about it. Before he could talk himself out of the whole thing he was sitting, strapped into a car with Chanyeol, being catapulted into space.  
  
They flew through the darkness, dodging asteroids and swooping past planets. Chanyeol screamed, first in joy and then in terror as he clutched Baekhyun's arm hard enough to leave five distinct fingerprint-sized bruises.  
  
When it was over, he didn't know whether to laugh, cry, beat up Baekhyun for taking him on the damn thing, or puke.  
  
Baekhyun let out a boisterous laugh as soon as he exited the ride, “I can’t believe you’re such a baby.”  
  
Walking unsteadily out into the sunlight, Chanyeol headed for a bench and collapsed. Baekhyun stood in front of him, face flushed, eyes gleaming. He had a huge grin plastered on his face. He took his camera phone out of his small pocket and captured the moment.  
  
"That was great! Can we go again?" he wondered aloud before he noticed the slightly pasty tinge to his skin. "Hey, are you alright?" the older asked as he sat beside him and traced a gentle circle with his fingers on his back.  
  
"Um, yeah. I'm fine. Just a little… unsettled," Chanyeol said, taking huge gulps of air into his lungs, trying to calm his queasy stomach. "I just need to sit still for five minutes, I guess. That was pretty intense. Yeah, intense."  
  
"You need to get away from the fumes from these go carts. Why don't you go sit up there by the submarine and I'll get you a Seven Up to settle your stomach?" Baekhyun watched him nod in agreement and guided him towards the Finding Nemo ride, peeling off when they passed a snack bar.  
  
He hoped Chanyeol would be alright. He should've had more sense than to take him on one or the big rides first.  
  
"Hi, can I get a small Seven Up, please? Oh, and a package of saltines. My friend's a little unsteady after going on Space Mountain." Baekhyun smiled at the teenager behind the counter, hoping he wouldn't have to buy a cup of soup to get the crackers.  
  
"Sure thing, sir. Space Mountain has that effect on a lot of people," the teen replied as she tossed a package of crackers onto the counter next to the soda. "Hope your friend feels better."  
  
Baekhyun nodded his thanks as he gathered his home remedy for nausea and made his way back to Chanyeol. His face had gotten some of its color back, so maybe the day wouldn't be a bust after all.  
  
"Here you go. Do you feel any better?" Baekhyun sat on the bench and patted Chanyeol's thigh.  
  
"Umm..yeah." He took a sip of soda and ripped open the packet of crackers, nibbling on one. "I'm not too bad. I just think that last cup of coffee I had with breakfast was ill advised."  
  
Baekhyun leaned back against the bench and stretched his legs out in front of him, tilting his face to the sun and absorbing its comforting warmth.  
  
"We'll go on this submarine ride next. It'll probably seem pretty silly now, but when I was a kid I used to love that ride." Baekhyun frowned in concentration, "I can't for the life of me remember what it used to be called."  
  
"Baekhyun-ah," Chanyeol said, his countenance was nothing but serious. "How come you decided to come back here after a long time?" He shifted on the bench, turning to face him.  
  
Baekhyun sat silent for several minutes. It had taken him years to realize that he wasn't unwilling to answer serious questions about his inner-most feelings; it just took some time for him to formulate the answers he wanted to give.  
  
There were too many lies he had uttered. Too many secrets he had kept. And he truly didn’t know how to be honest anymore.  
  
He missed his parents, but he missed the person who used to bring him here often after his parents died. His presence had been absent in his life for the past few years, leaving him to fall deeper into the void that was his marriage.  
  
Baekhyun reached up and lightly caressed the back of his neck. He couldn't for the life of his figure out why he found this relaxing instead of annoying. He'd stopped wondering about it years ago.  
  
"Well, I guess I just had too many special memories of coming here with, you know, my family," He finally answered, gazing at the families walking by. "After my dad died, my mother never brought me back. On my birthday, we started going to museums instead. And when I was old enough to come here with my friends, or alone, it just seemed wrong somehow. I wanted to come back here with someone special."  
  
_His husband._ He used to come here every year when they were still young and carefree on the day his parents died reminiscing the memory he had of them. But it had been three years or more since the last time his husband took him there. It had been three years since Baekhyun felt like loneliness would eat him up any moment.  
  
Turning to face Baekhyun, he smiled at him crookedly and leaned forward to kiss him lightly on the lips. The kiss was anything but awkward. It was slow and languid, and Baekhyun could feel the sweetness in Chanyeol’s lips as he deepened the kiss. He was startled at first, but after a moment, he forgot about his husband. He forgot about his status and everything that came with the fact that he was actually a married man. He forgot about who he was as Chanyeol held his neck, pulling him deeper to kiss him more passionately.  
  
After the kiss happened, Baekhyun found it hard to act normal around the other. He _couldn’t_ act normal when he had been caught off guard. He kept stumbling with his words, awkwardly stuttering when answering every question Chanyeol asked him during their walk home. When they ran out of topics to talk about, his stare darted to the ground as he continued his pace, and instead of showing his sweetest smile that he usually did whenever Chanyeol threw him a glance, he stretched his lips into a thin line. Chanyeol must have noticed how his behavior had changed. He tried not to make it obvious that he felt uncomfortable around him, but how could he act like nothing happened? Chanyeol _kissed_ him, and he kissed him back. They should have talked about what happened, but neither of them seemed to want to bring that up – or rather, neither of them was ready to talk about it.  
  
They were walking in unavoidable silence until Baekhyun announced that they had to part ways. Chanyeol insisted on walking him home, but Baekhyun had politely refused his offer because he still didn’t want him to know where he lived. The taller tilted his head to the side and looked at him for a brief moment. As he locked eyes with him, Baekhyun looked away instantly and cleared his throat before he said, “It’s late. I should go.”  
  
“Are you sure you don’t want me to walk you home?”  
  
“It’s fine. My home is not that far from here.”  
  
“Fine. Just be careful, okay?”  
  
Giving him a very slight nod in response, he scrunched up his nose and bid his farewell. Before he could turn on his heels, Chanyeol had managed to grab his wrist. Walking a few inches closer toward him, he stared at him like he was the only one that mattered in the world. Baekhyun could feel his heart beating hard and loud in his chest that he could almost hear it as he anticipated what was going to happen when Chanyeol leaned forward. He should turn his head by now to avoid any kind of gesture Chanyeol was about to do him, but there was something about his stare that hindered him from looking away.  
  
His breath caught in his throat as he felt he felt a pair of soft lips touch his cheek. As the soft skin of his mouth left the side of his face, the exact spot where it had come into contact turned into a brighter shade of pink. Before Baekhyun could do anything about the pleasant warmth that was spreading through his limbs, he had gone completely soft as he heard Chanyeol speak, barely a whisper as he drew back and smiled, “Thank you for today.”  
  
Blinking his eyes in response, he brought his fingers to caress his cheek. It was uncalled for. Even though it was just a simple peck, it could convey as much meaning as a full-on kiss on the lips. Baekhyun tried to avoid locking eyes with Chanyeol, so he shifted his gaze to focus on his worn-out sneakers. The only thing he wanted to do was to prevent himself from getting redder, so he really bid his farewell this time without looking much into his eyes and blended himself with the dark street, leaving Chanyeol behind with his unsaid thoughts.  
  
The street was empty, and the sky was dark above his head. His pace was slow as he walked under the streetlight, and so many thoughts were running in his head. He hated it. He hated how the voices in his head seemed to fuse together and mock him because of what he had done – telling him he was such an idiot because practically he had cheated on his husband, _right_?  
  
It was true that he was lonely, and Chanyeol managed to fill the void that had been present in his heart momentarily. But no matter how much he looked at it, it was still wrong. The connection that he felt between him and Chanyeol was something he should avoid at all costs. It shouldn’t have been there in the first place.  
  
He felt scared to the point that he couldn’t think straight at the moment. It wasn’t the kind of feeling that could make his adrenaline flow in his veins, _no_. It was the kind of feeling of being afraid and guilty, perhaps, of having done something that shouldn’t have been done that made his heart twist and and sunk with nerves.  
  
Of course, he was nervous. He had been since Chanyeol kissed him, and he had decided to return it mindlessly. It was an impulsive response – one that he didn’t think through beforehand.  
  
He knew what a kiss meant – be it gentle or passionate. It meant something more than just a friendly act. It was an act that symbolized lust, love, and growing affection. It was the talk of the soul, and honestly, Baekhyun had been trying to find out what his soul was trying to convey when he responded to the kiss. Did he feel lust toward him? Was it love? Was it an expression of his growing affection? He couldn’t find a definite answer to it, but he knew more than anything he wouldn’t have kissed him back _if_ he didn’t feel anything.  
  
He had never intended for the kiss to happen. It must have been a mistake. He shouldn’t have kissed anyone other than his husband. He shouldn’t have let anyone _kiss_ him to begin with. His heart had never beat for anyone else other than Sehun, but then, as he recalled the moment Chanyeol’s lips intertwined with his, it began to beat erratically in his chest; the sound was loud and almost clear in his eardrums.  
  
If there was anything Baekhyun hated in a fragment of relationship, it would be betrayal. He despised people who lied to their partners and even cheated on them. Becoming like them was the last thing he would want to, and he would resent himself if ever he found himself falling for someone when he was still legally married. Sehun _trusted_ him. And Baekhyun was determined to keep his trust until the end. He had declared his vows on the altar in front of hundreds of people that he would stand by his husband’s side until death do them apart. He knew so well that it could be disastrous for both of them if he kept anything that might violate a committed relationship’s contract of mutual trust.  
  
But he still did it anyway. He violated his relationship with Sehun by keeping Chanyeol close to him.  
  
It was _too_ dangerous. _Chanyeol_ was too dangerous.  
  
Each day that had passed without Sehun by his side had been suffocating him; he felt lonely, and the only companion that was ever loyal to him was his solitude. A friend was _perhaps_ what Baekhyun had been longing to have ever since his husband got too swamped with his work. After his encounter with the photographer, Baekhyun felt like he had found one. _A friend_. They shared so much in common so it was easy for him to befriend him.  
  
But was he _a friend_?  
  
Was Chanyeol only _just_ a friend?  
  
Baekhyun had never been honest with him, though. From the start, if he only wanted to be friends with him, he wouldn’t have lied about his marriage. He would tell him all sorts of things about it because it wasn’t hard to introduce himself as someone that was already married unless he had his own reasons not to reveal his identity.  
  
He’d met plenty of people from his line of work, and he had never felt the need to keep his identity hidden before. With Chanyeol, it was different. The more he spent time with him, the more he wanted to bury the fact that he belonged to someone else.  
  
Did he want something _more_?  
  
It was a bitter truth, but he admitted to himself that, _perhaps_ , he wanted him to be more than just a friend. It was partly his mistake that everything must have come to this point. He realized that the sole purpose he offered himself to accompany him was because he liked to be around him. Baekhyun enjoyed his constant presence in his life, and even though it had only been a few months, Chanyeol had made him a lot happier than Sehun ever did during their years of marriage.  
  
Maybe that was why he lied. He did it because he didn’t want to make the situation become awkward between them. Besides, he felt as if he had found what he had been looking for – someone to show him what it meant to be happy.  
  
He couldn’t define what it was he felt toward him. He knew it was more than just admiration, but it was too soon to call it love either. How could he love another person when he already had someone in his heart? Wasn’t his heart supposed to be for only one person?  
  
But if it was not love, then, how would he explain the pleasant buzz in his stomach that always came whenever Chanyeol was around? Not to mention the fact that it was easy for him to get flattered at simple remarks Chanyeol had always told him of his beauty. Chanyeol was honest with all of his opinions, and he believed Chanyeol wasn’t even trying to flirt at him when he told him how pretty he looked through his lens even though they were still practically strangers to each other.  
  
As for the kiss, _well_ , he didn’t quite understand why he didn’t try to push him when Chanyeol kissed him even though he knew there was a chance. Deep down in his heart, maybe he couldn’t deny if he actually liked the feeling of Chanyeol’s lips on his.  
  
But it was wrong. All of it was wrong. He shouldn’t have _kissed_ him back because by doing so, he had betrayed someone’s trust.  
  
He didn’t realize that he had led him on until Chanyeol thought that he had a chance with him when he actually didn’t. He had never intended to give him _that_ chance, but he did. He gave it to him anyway, and now, Chanyeol was going to think that it was okay for him to make a move because he didn’t even try to stop him.  
  
Was it still considered cheating if he didn’t see it coming? He wouldn’t know. He was so tired of answering his own thoughts. He pushed the thought of Chanyeol to the back of his head, hoping that he could forget the guilt that was trying to seep to the foreground of his mind.  


***

  
  
Chanyeol threw himself on the bed, and the bed dipped in an abrupt motion due to the sudden plop of his weight. He stared at the empty ceiling for a few moments and shut his eyes, feeling the comfort of the mattress supporting his body in all the right places. A smile lit up his face as the image of Baekhyun kissing him flashed in his head. The memory was still fresh that it was inevitable for him not to unconsciously think of it. Baekhyun’s lips were soft and pliant against his. He remembered the taste of his lips – sweet and intoxicating, and Chanyeol wanted more than merely a few seconds to savor them.  
  
He never expected the other to return the kiss because he didn’t intend for it to happen in the first place. It was spontaneous, and he did it without even thinking of the consequences. He was guilty that it happened, but Chanyeol wouldn’t mind kissing him again if he were given a chance to.  
  
He touched the upper part of his lips, stroking it gently with his thumb as he felt the taste of Baekhyun still lingering on his lips. It was _sweet_ , and it made his head dizzy and his heart bounce in a dizzying pendular motion. It was probably too early to admit that he had feelings – admiration or some sort _,_ perhaps, for the petite guy, but he wasn’t going to deny the fact that he deeply felt something for him, something that was more than just mere admiration. The feeling was still unbeknownst even to himself, and he still couldn’t identify it just yet.  
  
It might be admiration for his physical appearance because it was difficult for Chanyeol to keep himself from not getting attracted to Baekhyun when his beauty was stunning. Or it might be because of his demeanor or his carefree personality. Or was it because of his smile that was too blinding? Whatever it was, he believed it wasn’t simply because he was too bedazzling. There was more to it.  
  
Before he had met with Baekhyun, life was going okay without his constant presence. He was like a petal drifting in the sky, drawing Chanyeol to him with a great force. He didn’t know when it had started to change, but he longed to be close to him – to spend more time with him and do all sorts of things that they had never done before.  
  
As long as it was with Baekhyun, Chanyeol wouldn’t complain.  
  
He jolted up from the bed and reached for his camera bag lying on the floor. Unzipping the zip, he walked towards a small leather couch across the bed. He huffed a sigh and rubbed his temple, hoping that the exhaustion pooling in his body would somehow go away before plopping himself on the couch. Even though he had spent more of his time in the town with the older, he didn’t forget the sole purpose of his stay in Jinhae.  
  
Scrolling through the gallery, he noticed how Baekhyun’s face seemed to occupy the space in his camera storage. He really wasn’t joking when he said he found his light in the form of Byun Baekhyun. His constant presence in every picture that he had taken was never a failure. His smile never faltered, and the glint in his eyes was never dull. To Chanyeol, Baekhyun was like the brightest star in the night sky. He was the dim light of a candle in the darkness. Incandescent and alluring.  
  
When he had first come to this town, the first thing that had come to his mind was to find ways to get away as soon as possible and finish his project. But he had slowly come to realize that he didn’t want to leave the town soon.  
  
He didn’t want to leave Baekhyun.  
  
  


***

  
  
  
  
Baekhyun stayed at his home for the next few days. He didn’t go to the park like he usually did, and he didn’t let Chanyeol know how he was doing. When he texted him, asking him what happened, and why he didn’t reply to any of his messages, Baekhyun only read through them without replying. He knew he was being cruel to him, but he decided it would be a good decision for both of them. He would do anything as long as his marriage wouldn’t be harmed – even if it meant that he should cut loose with Chanyeol.  
  
Being confined in his house, there wasn’t much he could do. He could either watch television in the living room or sit in front of his laptop to continue working on his writing or read some articles to just simply enhance his knowledge.  
  
He walked out of his room and went downstairs. He shuffled about the spacious room, noticing how big yet how empty the house felt at the moment. It wasn’t that big luxurious house decorated with expensive ceramics that rich people had. It was just simply the kind of house you would want to live in with the one you love with only two bedrooms, a kitchen and a living room with wooden properties placed in every corner of the house. The blue paint that covered the wall was a smooth unbroken layer and the window frames were a brilliant white on top of new wood.  
  
It had been Baekhyun’s dream back then when he was still dating Sehun to own a house in the countryside, and after a year living with his parents, Sehun had saved enough money to buy a house that Baekhyun wanted.  
  
He waited for Sehun on the couch after he had texted him a short message asking him to come home sooner if possible. He read some magazines that he had taken beforehand from the bookshelf to kill time. He fell asleep while waiting for Sehun, and when he heard the sound of the bell resonated in the room, he got up immediately and rushed to the front door.  
  
Once Sehun was inside, he wrapped his hands around the taller, inhaling the familiar scent that had been long forgotten. It had been weeks since the last time Sehun made an attempt to touch him that it made Baekhyun wonder if the other had actually lost interest in him or his body. He had always convinced himself that it wasn’t the case. It wasn’t because he wasn’t capable to satisfy his husband’s sexual needs. _No_. Sehun had admitted himself that he was good in bed. Baekhyun could make him feel good in each thrust he’d enforced on him and as for Baekhyun, he felt a wave of indescribable pleasure whenever Sehun touched every one of his sensitive spots. He remembered the first time he had his orgasm; he thought that he had seen stars above his head when he blinked his eyes after completion. He believed nobody could ever make him feel complete like what Sehun had always made him feel.  
  
“Baekhyun-ah, I’m tired.” Sehun said, his voice a little stern but husky.  
  
Burying his head into the warm surface that was Sehun’s chest, Baekhyun murmured faintly as he tilted his head up to look at his husband, “Please, Sehun. I miss you.”  
  
He had never begged for his husband to touch him, but at that moment, he wanted to feel loved again. He wanted to feel like he belonged to someone. Like he belonged to his husband, so he would feel really guilty if he ever dared to taint his relationship with him by having an affair with someone else.  
  
He was afraid. Afraid that if Sehun kept ignoring him physically and emotionally, he would withdraw himself from the marriage that he’d been trying so hard to save.  
  
Sehun didn’t exactly give him a response, but Baekhyun took his silent demeanor as an indication of a _yes._ Without wasting time, he leaned up and kissed his husband on the lips. The other didn’t return the kiss, but Baekhyun was eager. Forcing his lips against the other’s unmoving lips, he grabbed Sehun by his collar and pulled him in. Sehun was quick to turn the situation as he reached Baekhyun’s nape and wrapped his hand around his neck.  
  
For some reason he couldn’t quite comprehend, Baekhyun imagined those were Chanyeol’s large hands holding him straight by the waist, keeping him close. His consciousness surfaced as he felt a pair of lips returning the favor. He shut his eyes as he felt the other’s lips pressed against his. He remembered how it used to taste so sweet when Sehun first kissed him on their first date, but his lips tasted different this time – like it had grown bitter. As he felt the other slipping his tongue into his, he shut his eyes close, recalling the moment when Chanyeol had kissed him a few days ago so his mind could make out the taste of his lips. And it did. He remembered how Chanyeol’s lips were pliant and sweet against his, and he remembered liking every bit of it.  
  
Every part of consciousness was aching to feel his husband’s touch, but the person that was conquering his mind at the moment was not him. His mind was filled with _Chanyeol, Chanyeol, Chanyeol_. He imagined how comfortable it might be to be enveloped in _his_ hug and to be caressed by his large hands. Sehun’s hands were perhaps equally large as they slowly trailed the side of Baekhyun’s face, but they had ceased to send warmth into his skin like they used to.  
  
Baekhyun didn’t know why it felt that way. He didn’t know when it started to go wrong. His mind was occupied with the thought of Chanyeol when Sehun was touching him, and Baekhyun was afraid. He was afraid because he shouldn’t have thought of another man when he was with his husband. He pushed the thought of Chanyeol to the back of his mind and carefully began working on the buttons of Sehun’s shirt as his lips were still being devoured by the taller. Parting his lips, he gushed a breath of air against Sehun’s bare chest and gracefully trailed his fingers down until he reached his navel. He could feel Sehun shuddering under his touch, and in a spur of moment, the taller was suddenly awakened. He pinned his petite body to the wall and kissed him senseless, yanking off every piece of clothing that was trying to hinder him from touching baekhyun. The brunette had to stifle an urge to moan when Sehun brushed his finger against his sensitive nipple – circling around it as he whispered in his ear, “Moan for me, Baek. It’s been a while since the last time I heard you moan.”  
  
And Baekhyun let out a guttural moan. Sehun liked it when Baekhyun moaned loudly under him – satisfied of every action that he performed during their intercourse. Baekhyun could feel a single tear running down his cheek as Sehun sucked all of his sensitive spot, leaving a mark on each of them.  
  
Sehun dropped to his knees, taking Baekhyun’s cock into his palm before he slowly wrapped his mouth around it – coating every corner of his throbbing with his saliva. Baekhyun’s toes curled and his cock throbbed even more painfully in Sehun’s mouth due to the sudden warmth that he procured. Taking a few locks of Sehun’s hair into his hands, he thrusted himself deeper into the taller’s throat, and Sehun welcomed each of his thrust with a gag. Keeping him still by the waist, he deep-throated Baekhyun with rapid pace, and he felt Baekhyun’s body quivering as hot white liquid squirted in his throat.  
  
  


***

  
  
  
  
Chanyeol was busy editing a picture of a certain guy bending over to tie up his shoelaces on a stoned pavement when nobody was around. He remembered clearly how and when it was taken. It was from one of those days where they were just strolling around the town aimlessly – passing by different streets, different stores, and different countenances while exchanging stories once in awhile. Baekhyun had asked him to wait for a moment for him to tie his shoelaces on the side of the pavement, and Chanyeol had agreed. While Baekhyun was unaware of his surroundings, Chanyeol had taken the chance to snap a picture of him, and it had turned out really great.  
  
He took a sip of the wine that he had bought earlier at the store a few blocks away from his staying place as he adjusted the brightness, contrast and saturation of the photo that seemed to fit best with the image. He was not much of a drinker, and when he drank, there was always a reason behind it.  
  
One reason he got himself into the situation he was in was because Baekhyun had been ignoring him for days; almost a week. He didn’t reply to any of his texts even if it was only a simple message asking him how he was doing.  
  
He felt like the other was trying to avoid him at all costs.  
  
Even though Chanyeol only knew him for a couple of weeks, Baekhyun had never missed any of his calls or ignored his texts unless he had an intention to do so. What made him more devastated was that the other had seemingly stopped going to the park.  
  
He wondered whether it was because of the kiss they shared at the amusement park that Baekhyun started to avoid him. He would regret for having kissed him if that was the case. Chanyeol’s head throbbed harder when he tried to recall the moment. He shouldn’t have done it in the first place if it would make the other feel burdened. He should have restrained himself from kissing Baekhyun when he looked so kissable in front of him if the consequences would be like this.  
  
He felt guilty, and because of his uncalculated behavior, he didn’t know how to reach him. It wasn’t his place to worry about Baekhyun when he was just someone he barely knew. He didn’t even know where he lived. Chanyeol had only learned that Baekhyun lived not too far away from the park he often visited, but he never knew where it actually was. He had asked him the address for a few times but had stopped asking since he wouldn’t tell him. But still, he only wanted to know whether he was doing good. Was it too much to ask?  
  
Chanyeol was snapped out of his reverie when his phone rang somewhere in the room. He couldn’t locate where it was, but he guessed the sound came from the bed. Heaving a sigh, he got up from his position and shuffled toward the bed. Rummaging through the blanket, he finally took a hold of his phone and the sound become clearer in his hand. He glanced at the caller ID and threw himself on the bed, burying his head on the pillow. The ringtone kept ringing and it made his ear sick as he let it resonate in the room. He had no intention of answering the calls because he didn’t want to talk to Jongdae. He had been calling him for a few consecutive times – reminding him that he didn’t have much time left to finish his project. And Chanyeol was more than aware of it. He didn’t need to be reminded twice or a few times. He knew he was close to his deadline, and he knew he didn’t have much time left to explain his situation to Baekhyun.  
  
As if God had heard his prayer, he received a message from him a few moments after Jongdae had called. It wasn’t a reply to any of the texts he had sent him since a few days ago. It was a short message asking him to meet tomorrow morning in the park that they usually visited.  
  
It was only a simple sentence, but it was laced with seriousness.  
  
Chanyeol wasn’t prepared to hear what Baekhyun had to say to him, but he had decided to tell him that he was going back soon. He deserved to know even if Baekhyun had grown to resent him because of the kiss that had happened a few days earlier.  
  
  


***

  
  
  
  
The next day, Baekhyun came to the park half an hour earlier than he should. The air around him was still crisp and the birds were twittering to each other, producing a string of pleasant tune in his ears. He’d spent too much of his time hanging around the place that he knew for some reason, nobody would come to the park before eight. He liked it when the park was still quiet because it made him feel alive again. It was as if an invisible burden on his shoulders had been lifted up as he took long deep breaths and let the fresh air infiltrate his system and circulated in him. He also thought it would be better if he came before the other; that way he would get a higher chance to deliver what he was going to say before Chanyeol could say anything. He sat on his usual spot and quietly waited for the photographer to come.  
  
After a few days of thinking things through, he had come to a decision that he would tell Chanyeol the truth – that he was married. He was sure it wouldn’t be easy to accept, but he wasn’t going to lie anymore to him. He needed to know that he wasn’t trying to lead him on. Baekhyun believed – or he made himself believe – that the time he spent with Chanyeol was purely a friendly act, and they shouldn’t become more than friends or acquaintances.  
  
He really enjoyed Chanyeol’s company, and after a while, he finally felt like he had someone to share his happiness with again. He had someone who would listen to his stories or to just simply hang around him. He didn’t have any friends left in town as they had all moved to big cities like Seoul and Busan. He was left all alone there to wallow in his loneliness. He even let his husband leave his side to pursue his dream. He was alone and devastated, so when Chanyeol came to him, he found a glimmer of hope that perhaps, he had found a consolation in him.  
  
And Baekhyun was beyond happy to have found such great company. He didn’t feel as lonely as before, and for a while, he felt as if not having his husband around didn’t matter at all as long as Chanyeol was with him; talking to him. Maybe that was what he needed in the past few months. The reason why he felt lonely and all. Maybe he only needed someone. _A company_ or some sort. To make the day a little bit brighter and bearable.  
  
He was pulled out of his trance when he heard a faint sound of footsteps coming toward him. The crunch of the person’s sole against the stoned pathway was defined in his ears that he couldn’t help but to crane his neck to the source of the sound until a familiar figure walking toward him came into view.  
  
Silence hung in the air as Chanyeol was finally seated next to him on the bench. Baekhyun didn’t know where to begin. A part of him wanted to apologize for cutting all contact with the man, but another part of him was telling him to just tell him the truth already and walk as far away as possible before things got more complicated. He rubbed his palms that were starting to get damp, letting out a heavy sigh before he began, “How are you doing?”  
  
Unfazed, Chanyeol replied, “I should be the one asking you that. You didn’t even reply to my texts, Baek, where have you been?”  
  
“Just someplace I had to be.”  
  
“Really? Were you that busy that you wouldn’t even let me know how you were doing? And here I thought we’re getting closer.”  
  
“I needed some time to think.”  
  
“Is it because of the kiss?”  
  
_Yes, it’s because of the kiss._ “No.”  
  
“Was I being too forward? I’m sorry if you feel that way.”  
  
“No, no, it’s just- it wasn’t because of the kiss. Well, it was partly because of it, but there’s another thing.”  
  
“What is it? Is there anything that I need to know? Tell me, Baek, so I know how I should behave around you. I feel like you shut me out because I don’t even know how to reach you. I feel like you’re avoiding me. You didn’t want to talk to me anymore and I keep wondering why.”  
  
“I did it on purpose. Shutting you out.” Baekhyun let the sentence hang in the air before he continued, “Because we can’t keep meeting like this, Yeol. We can’t carry on whatever happens between us. We just… can’t.”  
  
“But, why? Did I do something wrong? It’s because of the kiss, right? Is it so wrong for me to make a move on you? I’m sorry, Baek. I didn’t know it would make you feel uncomfortable. Heck, I didn’t even know if you swing that way but I still tried my luck because-”  
  
“It’s not your fault, Chanyeol. I’m married.”  
  
Baekhyun wanted to take those words back, but he couldn’t. The truth had slipped out of his mouth, and Chanyeol had heard it loud and clear. He had let him know that he belonged to someone else. He was sure from that point onward, Chanyeol wouldn’t look at him the same way ever again  
  
“I’m married.” he said faintly, “I have a husband. That’s why.”  
  
He looked away and stared into the empty ground to avoid Chanyeol’s gaze.  
  
He wasn’t ready to look at him because he was guilty. He was guilty for lying, and he was guilty for giving him a false hope.  
  
As expected, the truth didn’t sit well with Chanyeol. The truth was quite unbelievable, shocking really. His mind was sent reeling, unable to comprehend or process the situation that was happening at the moment. He stood up upon hearing it, running his fingers through his hair as he took a few steps back, frustrated, “A what? Married? I don’t- I don’t understand. You’re joking now, right? Why would you lie something like that? That’s not even funny, Baek.”  
  
“It’s true. Please listen to what I have to say.” He said pleadingly.  
  
Chanyeol looked away, then looked back at him without giving any response.  
  
“I was being too selfish, and I only thought of myself. I’m sorry, Chanyeol. I thought we could be friends, but it was hard for me. You were too thoughtful, and you treated me like I was the most precious thing in the world. I kept telling myself that it was okay since I was lonely myself – that I needed company. But when you kissed me, my heart thumped. It thumped so loud that I could almost hear it in my ears. It was frightening. It scared the heck out of me because I was slowly falling for you.”  
  
It was too much. The truth was too much for Chanyeol to handle that he looked like he could vomit anytime as he rubbed his temple continuously. Listening to what Baekhyun had to say made him want to pace about and run away as far away possible because he wasn’t prepared to hear any of it, “I don’t have a choice but to believe you, right?”  
  
“I’m really sorry.”  
  
“Why didn’t you tell me from the beginning?”  
  
“I don’t know. I just couldn’t do it. You have every reason to be mad at me.”  
  
“So why did you kiss me back? If you know that it would ruin your relationship, why did you kiss me back?”  
  
“It was a mistake.”  
  
Chanyeol’s expression became very serious, but he chuckled ironically. “Right. Of course it was a mistake.” Heaving a sigh, Chanyeol ruffled his hair in a frustrated manner, “So I guess this is the end?”  
  
Baekhyun didn’t say a word, but he nodded in response. That should be enough for an answer. If he gave in to his selfishness, he wanted so badly to keep Chanyeol by his side, to spend the next day and the following days together with him, but he would be a heartless spouse to Sehun. No matter how aloof he had felt all these years without his constant presence, their marriage was something sacred that he needed to keep afloat.  
  
“Even if I tried, I wouldn’t stand a chance, right?” Chanyeol asked, his voice sounded desperate this time.  
  
“It wasn’t supposed to turn out like this. We shouldn’t have kissed.”  
  
“Do you regret it?”  
  
“No- I don’t think I do. But I will regret for the rest of my life if I don’t tell you about my marriage because you’ll find out eventually no matter how hard I try to cover it. And I don’t want you to find out on your own. That’s why I’m here… telling you all of this. I’ve saved us from greater pain, Chanyeol.”  
  
Chanyeol tried to gain his composure that had seemed to leave him a few moments ago, taking long deep breaths as he proceeded to sit himself next to the brunette again before he said, “So what do you want me to do now?”  
  
“I know it’s going to be hard, but will you forget me? It’s for the best. One thing that you should know is that everything I’ve done for you was sincere. I like you. I like having you around. I wanted to spend more time with you, but I forgot who I am. I’ve crossed the line that’s already been set for me.”  
  
“You know what, Baek? I feel like a fool. I thought this could be something. When I first met you, I was really sure that we could make this work. But here you are telling me that you already have someone else.”  
  
“I’m sorry.”  
  
“Stop saying sorry. It was partly my fault too.”  
  
“I don’t know what to say, but I knew you’re going to get upset with me. You should forget me. I’m just someone you’ve met in the street.”  
  
“Easy for you to say.”  
  
“Leave this town as soon as possible before I change my mind.”  
  
“You don’t have to worry. I’ll be leaving soon anyway.”  
  
“That’s good to know.” Baekhyun felt a pang in his chest as he said that.  
  
“Actually I was gonna ask you to come with me to Seoul in a few days, but I guess I can’t do that now, huh?”  
  
Chanyeol didn’t get any response. How could Baekhyun respond to anything he said if he felt like he could break into a sob whenever he opened his mouth? No matter how much he had tried to push the growing feelings he had for the other, he couldn’t lie to himself that he didn’t want the photographer to disappear from his life forever.  
  
“You should go.” Baekhyun managed to say before he turned his head to look at the man beside him. “Forget me. Forget you’ve ever met me. I’ll do the same because that’s the only thing I could do right now.”  
  
“You’re so cruel.” Chanyeol stood up, feeling dejected and stung, unable to say anything else. Baekhyun could tell that he was upset from the way he kept swinging his arms when he talked.  
  
“Okay, if that’s what you want. Even if you say you like me, I still can’t do anything. But I won’t forget you. I won’t ever forget that I met you here. If only I had met you before him, this wouldn’t have happened to us.”  
  
“You should go now, for real.”  
  
“Can I hug you?” Silence was all Chanyeol received. Slowly, he walked to him who had stood up from his previous position. Pulling him closer, he wrapped his hands around him.  
  
“Chanyeol?” Baekhyun murmured without making an attempt to look up.  
  
Chanyeol hummed in response.  
  
“Thank you for coming here.”  
  
Despite the heaviness in his stomach, Baekhyun let the other embrace him in his arms. It wasn’t long, but it was enough to make him sink into his warmth. There was something so warm, something that felt right, smelt right when the hug lasted. Baekhyun let his muscles loose as he buried his head on the taller’s chest. The world seemed to melt away as he squeezed him back, not wanting the moment to end.  
  
  


***

  
  
  
  
Baekhyun thought he had done the right thing by giving him a chance to walk out from his life. It was a decision that he was ought to take to keep his marriage intact. But why did his heart ache in his chest like it was getting more and more difficult to a face a reality where Chanyeol wasn’t there anymore?  
  
He didn’t expect for the other to let him know his departure, but deep down in his heart, he wished so dearly Chanyeol would contact him one more time simply to let him know that he was leaving.  
  
Weeks had gone by so painfully long for Baekhyun ever since he confessed about his marriage to Chanyeol. The seasons had changed, but he had never heard of him again. Whether he was doing good or having a hard time because of him, he wouldn’t know. The only thing he was sure of was that Chanyeol must have left the town and went back to Seoul. He had probably moved on with his life and forgot that Baekhyun even existed. He would just be nothing more than another subject Chanyeol had encountered along his journey.  
  
The air was frozen lace on his skin, delicate and cold as it gushed harshly in his direction. Above him, the sky was decorated with grey clouds, reflecting his gloomy mood perfectly. The leaves had fallen off completely from the trees, making it bare in the harsh cold of winter. Winter had never been his favorite season. He practically despised winter and everything that came along with it. Everything would be frozen, hidden, and forced to stop dancing. People would spend most of their time confined in their homes by the fireplace and the streets would be empty and lifeless.  
  
Anyone in their right mind would rather stay comfortably in their house with a high-functioning heater than wander around aimlessly like what Baekhyun was doing at the moment. He watched his boots over the frozen pathway, perfect concrete slabs as he walked forward. The memory flashed before his eyes as he glanced toward the unoccupied bench under the tree that was covered with frost. He saw himself sitting on it with Chanyeol in the coldest day of Autumn where the leaves were still glowing with vibrant colors above them, laughing along with him as they looked through the pictures in his camera. He remembered how Chanyeol would offer him his hand when he felt cold, and he would take it without a second thought.  
  
He slowly walked toward the bench and promptly sat on it after removing the frost with his hand. It’s been weeks. Six weeks to be precise. He went to the park again and thought him. He thought of the time when he sat together with him on their usual spot in the park. He remembered every detail from the sound of the birds chirping around them to the sound of his laugh.  
  
_Why do you keep appearing in my thoughts?  
  
Why do I keep feeling this way toward you?_  
  
He felt his heart tighten in his chest. It’s unhealthy. He had a husband and Chanyeol has a life to lead on. But he kept thinking of him. Even when he had let him go, he couldn’t shake his feelings away.  
  
Letting out a long frustrated sigh, he leaned himself deeper against the cold wooden surface of the bench. It seemed like he had grown numb from the cold because no matter how harsh the air was blowing, he didn’t shiver. He’d rather be here in the park where he felt like he was at home no matter what the season was.  
  
That day, Sehun was coming home, and for once, Baekhyun found himself not looking forward to it. He had been out of his reach for a couple of days that Baekhyun was starting to get tired of worrying him. Knowing too well that being a pilot would take so much of his husband’s time for him, he wondered why he agreed on marrying him in the first place. He believed it was because of his undying love for the other. Love brought them together to the altar, but it was also love that destroyed them emotionally.  
  
It broke his heart how his husband always had an excuse not to come home. He barely came home once in a week ever since his flight schedule got intensified. At least that was what he told him. Baekhyun was sick of being put aside. For once, he wanted Sehun to put him before his job just like how Baekhyun put their marriage before his selfish desire.  
  
  


***

  
  
  
  
Baekhyun had been sitting on the sofa watching a television show when suddenly the doorbell rang. He walked over to unlock the door, expecting no one. Sehun’s exhausted face was the first thing he noticed when the door cracked open, revealing his presence. His husband gave him a peck on the lips and gestured to him to carry his luggage inside and followed his husband who was walking toward their shared bedroom. Baekhyun complied without dispute. He was not only a loyal husband, but he was also obedient to the ordinances of his role.  
  
When he was inside of their room, Sehun had already sprawled over the mattress. Both of his legs were dangling off the side, and his feet were almost touching the carpeted floor. The bed dipped as Baekhyun sat on the space next to his husband. He reached closer to examine Sehun’s features closely, his breath gushing against his face. He could tell the other was fully awake behind his closed eyelids, but he did nothing knowing that Baekhyun was an inch away from him. Slowly trailing his dainty fingers along his defined jaw, he whispered, “Are you tired? Do you want me to take your clothes off for you?”  
  
Sehun grabbed his wrist, preventing him from going further as he replied, “Thanks, Baek, but I can do it myself.”  
  
Shattered was his heart when he heard those words coming out of him. He felt unwanted. No matter how hard he was trying to make things work between them, Sehun didn’t even appreciate his effort to get close to him. He was beginning to think that it was useless. All of his efforts to prevent their marriage from falling apart was futile. He felt the other had grown too distant that it was impossible for him to reach him anymore. Did he find someone better than him? It was a dreadful thought. One that shouldn’t even have crossed his mind. Sehun would never cheat on him because he loved him, right?  
  
When Baekhyun was preoccupied by a lot of things running in his mind, Sehun had finished unbuttoning his shirt by himself and gone to the bathroom. While he was in the bathroom, Baekhyun noticed how Sehun’s phone kept ringing. The sound was muffled, though, and he realized it was coming from under the pillow. Sehun would hear it ring if he were to take the pillow away from above the phone, so he let it ring until it stopped. Once it had completely stopped, the phone vibrated harshly in between the bed and the pillow, indicating that there was an incoming message. Baekhyun pondered in his head whether it was alright for him to check the caller. He wanted to know who would call his husband in this late hour. Gathering all of his courage, he took the phone into his palm and stared at it for a moment before pressing the button on top to make the screen light up. He blinked his eyes as he fixated his gaze on the notification center.  
  
_Missed call from That Flight Attendant Luhan_  
  
Above it was another notification of a few incoming texts from the same contact name.  
  
_Hi babe, did you arrive safely?_  
  
_It’s been only a few hours since I last saw you, but I miss you already. Rest well~_  
  
Baekhyun shook his head as he read through the messages one more time. _This can’t be happening._ He mused. Did he see it right? He didn’t just see a text from a guy telling his husband that he missed him, did he?  
  
“Sehun wouldn’t cheat on me.” He said lowly as he let the phone in his grip fall onto the mattress and dropped to his knees.  
  
It was a possibility that had never once crossed his mind. They had been distant – there was no way he could deny it, but he thought it was because the other was so preoccupied with his work that he couldn’t spare a glance at him. It took some time to see what was going on, to understand that it wasn’t because of his job that Sehun had distanced himself from him. At the moment, he felt like he didn’t know who his husband was anymore. He didn’t know whom he had promised his entire life to anymore.  
  
As Sehun exited the bathroom, he noticed his phone was slipping from Baekhyun’s hand and his pupil dilated in horror like he had just seen a ghost appearing before his eyes. With a damp towel around his waist, Sehun shuffled toward him and screamed at the man sitting on the bed, “What have you done?”  
  
Grabbing his cellphone dearly in his hand, Sehun swiped the screen and noticed a few messages popping up on the notification bar. He realized Baekhyun must have seen it from the way his face was staring blankly into nothingness.  
  
“Did you look through my phone without my permission? Have you not learned about privacy?” Sehun’s tone of voice was raised. He practically shouted at him. It was the kind of tone of someone in total anger – the kind of tone Baekhyun dreaded the most because his husband only raised his voice when he felt really upset about something. And right then, he knew more than anyone that Sehun _was_ upset.  
  
He wanted to cower down before him and beg for his forgiveness, but as a man with dignity, he also deserved an explanation. So instead of bowing his head to apologize, he walked up to him and tilted his face up slightly to meet Sehun’s daggering stare.  
  
“Should I be the one asking you? Who is Luhan? And why is he calling you this late? Doesn’t he know you have a husband? Does he think it’s okay for him to call you–“  
  
_Slap._  
  
The sound was as loud as a clap – skin against skin, and it resonated in the room. He touched his cheek with his palm, grazing the red welted skin just below the eye where the ring of his husband had caught him with his fingers. Baekyhun’s vision became blurred and hazy as he felt the aftermath of the previous action stung on his face. It had been an open-handed smack, unexpected. Something that he had never thought his husband was capable of doing. He staggered backwards, clutching his face as his eyes were slowly watering  
  
“You’re unbelievable.”  
  
“That’s right. I cheated on you, Baek. It was difficult for me to keep my hands to myself. I’m the filthy one here.” Sehun said as he took a small step toward his husband.  
  
“Stay away from me.”  
  
In a haste of moment, Sehun took hold of Baekhyun’s arm. His firm grip was enough to make him stop from moving further. Baekhyun’s eyes were clouded with a mix of anger and disappointment as he looked at his husband with a rather sickening stare, struggling from his grip.  
  
“But you love your filthy husband, don’t you? You will forgive me if I say so, am I right?” Sehun cupped Baekhyun’s face with his large hands as he forced a kiss on him. It was nowhere near gentle, and for the first time in his life, Baekhyun felt nauseated by his touch. Sealing his lips closed, the brunette kept struggling to get himself off Sehun’s grip, but it seemed like his sum of effort was futile. Sehun was too strong and when he was determined to do something, nothing shouldn’t get in his way.  
  
“Open your lips for me, Baek. Don’t make me put even more force on you.”  
  
Shaking his head, the brunette muttered as he pushed away his husband with a great force to no avail, “You’re insane.”  
  
Sehun forced himself back on him and pinned him against the wall and this time, their mouths unwillingly collided painfully with bruising kisses because it was too painful for the brunet to keep resisting. He tried to push him off, though, but Sehun grabbed both of his arms and flung them above his head, holding them immobile and continued grinding his body against him. His fingers dig into the brunette’s skin, leaving bruises on his arms in each of his attempt to break free. Baekhyun’s breath came out as ragged gasps as Sehun sucked the air out of him almost completely. While Baekhyun was struggling, Sehun positioned his leg in between his clothed thighs. He grinded his crotch against the other’s, eliciting a broken moan as he whispered in his ears, “You’ve been yearning for me, have you? You want me to touch you so bad that you get worked up over a message from a co-worker. Tell me, Baekhyun!”  
  
Before the brunette had a chance to reply, he had resumed to hold Baekhyun’s wrists with one of his hands and held them so tight and with so much weight on them as he abused his lips with another forceful kiss. Their lips were still roughly connected as another hand of the taller slid down his sides and landed on his waist, just above the hem of his pants. In a haste of moment, Sehun slipped a hand and kneaded his globes with his palm. The brunet bit his lip as to prevent a moan escaping from his mouth as he felt an index being promptly inserted into his entrance.  
  
He slumped his head against Sehun’s shoulder, powerless and almost completely paralyzed. Sehun had taken things too far with his action. They could have solved the problem by talking things out had Sehun been in his right state of mind. It was unnecessary of him to coerce his way on Baekhyun, but he felt angered and upset. Right then, he lost all his senses to humanity.  
  
He seemed to have lost his senses of hearing and speaking too because even though Baekhyun had begged him continuously to let him go, he didn’t grant him his wish. Instead, he pulled the man closer to his chest, his eyes a bizarre mix of lust and fury.  
  
When his other hand began unbuttoning his shirt, Baekhyun thought this could be a chance to escape. But he thought wrong. His hands immediately wandered to roam aimlessly all over his abdomen as his skin was exposed to the air, making him unable to move. Baekhyun slightly shivered as his husband breathed on his neck, leaving him aghast and unable to utter a single word.  
  
Baekhyun was resisting, but it was becoming too much for him to handle. So he groaned due to the simple ministration the other was giving him.  
  
Taking one of Baekhyun’s buds in between his thumb and index finger, he pinched on it harshly, letting an agonizing groan elicited from his husband’s parted lips. Baekhyun closed his eyelids as he felt a single tear slowly trickling down his cheek. He had never felt so violated before. And his husband – the man that he thought he loved so dearly – was the one who made him feel that way. He wanted to scream and ask for help, but it would be useless. Nobody was going to hear him anyway. So the only thing he could do at the moment was to hope to any God out there that Sehun would stop whatever stunt he was trying to pull on him.  
  
His towel had long dropped to the floor so the only fabric that was keeping his member physically brushed against the other’s was Baekhyun’s pajama pants. In a swift movement, he pulled down his pants and took Baekhyun’s member in his hand, making him yelp in surprise. Baekhyun was helpless because the more he did something to break free from his grip, the more Sehun put force on him.  
  
“Sehun, don’t-“  
  
With a grunt, Sehun pinned Baekhyun to the bed and threw his body on it before promptly setting himself in between his legs.  
  
“What are you doing?”  
  
“I’m going to fuck you hard until you pass out and beg for my mercy, Baekhyun. Do you understand? You need to get a lesson once in a while.”  
  
“What did I do so wrong, Sehun-ah? I just-“  
  
“Aaah-“  
  
After Sehun raised Baekhyun’s hips into the air, he entered him in one swift movement without any further preparation. Actually, he slicked his cock with his spit beforehand because as much as he wanted to teach his husband a lesson, he knew it would be painful for the other to take him raw. But still Baekhyun cried out. The only thing he wanted to do was push Sehun away but he was too weak. No matter how hard he had tried to push his chest, Sehun still dominated as his body hovered over him. The pace quickened and the only feeling Baekhyun felt was pain. More tears trickled out of his eyes, and it only dampened his cheeks.  
  
“Ssshh. Why are you crying, babe? I’ll make you feel good.”  
  
Baekhyun panted as he adjusted his lower part to the unfamiliar friction as his husband thrusted in and out of his entrance – his motions driving him higher to that pinnacle of desire that he wanted to avoid so badly. He should come back to his senses. He shouldn’t give in because his husband was practically raping him.  
  
Baekhyun whimpered and kept asking for the other to stop, but instead of putting a halt into his raging act, Sehun pulled out almost all the way before thrusting all the way in. When a cry broke from the brunet’s throat, Sehun began to quicken the pace, hitting his husband’s spot over and over again.  
  
Baekhyun was writhing under him, helplessly asking for his mercy, but his plea was never heard.  
  
“P-please..”  
  
_Thrust._  
  
“S-stop..”  
  
_Thrust._  
  
Sehun was heavily panting as he thrusted into Baekhyun continuously, and even though Baekhyun begged him to stop, his voice was not heard as Sehun’s mind was clouded with lust that almost drove him into oblivion. Sehun cupped the brunet’s chin and kissed him vigorously yet again. Baekhyun didn’t know why, but he felt his mouth involuntarily parting to let Sehun’s tongue lap over his teeth. A moan came out from his throat as the taller sucked the air out of him almost completely with each forceful kiss he was giving him, and at the same moment his seed filled Baekhyun. The brunet’s cavern closed tightly around him, drawing out his orgasm while Baekhyun suffered from involuntary ejaculation. His body was quivering from the burning sensation that he did not want to feel. He was confused and he was ashamed of himself because his body reacted in total opposite of what his heart wanted. His mind was hazy, and he felt sick to the point that he could pass out any minute. He didn’t think it was normal to react to each of the physical stimulation that Sehun was giving him when the sex was nonconsensual in the first place.  
  
When there was only the sound of uneven breaths coming from the other man in the room, Baekhyun got off the bed and rushed to the bathroom. His facial expression was a bizarre mix of shame and confusion. In all the years they had spent together, he had never seen his husband get so worked up, let alone getting mad at him. It was as if Sehun had changed into a completely different person, and Baekhyun didn’t know who he was anymore.  
  
He had been lonely, and he had been longing to feel every touch of his husband, but this wasn’t what he wanted. This wasn’t what he expected. Sex had always been good and amazing with him, but he would never think the same ever again knowing that Sehun can get too abusive. He let the warm water pour above him and trickle down his filthy body. He wanted to forget what had just happened to him. He felt violated. He felt used and assaulted at the moment. And that was not a good thing. His body was in so much pain – physically and emotionally because even though Sehun was his husband, he didn’t have a right to his body, to touch him mindlessly if he didn’t give him any consent in the first place. But what could he do when Sehun was a man with authority in their shared relationship?  
  
He was mad at himself for having put so much trust in Sehun but end up getting hurt and betrayal in return. They should’ve talked about how Sehun could cheat on him when all this time he had been trying so hard to keep their marriage unharmed. But they didn’t. He didn’t know if he could ever forgive Sehun for what he had done, but as it had become crystal clear that his marriage was really falling apart now that he found out he had been cheated on, he knew for sure that it was time for him to let go of it.  
  
  


***

  
  
  
  
As he was greeted by cold chilly breeze outside, he walked away from where his house was standing without looking back with a backpack and a small bag in his hand. Having spent the night sleeping his weariness away on the couch, he successfully sneaked himself into the bedroom to collect his stuff. His sore back was a reminder of the previous exploit he wanted to forget. He didn’t have much time to pack all of his clothes, though, so he only packed those that he usually wore and the ones that were comfortable enough to keep him warm.  
  
Empty was the street Baekhyun was passing by aside from the lone middle-aged woman sweeping off a handful of fallen leaves that littered the ground. Baekhyun smiled at her as she craned her neck toward his direction, and the woman smiled back as she swished the scattering leaves to the left. Baekhyun had never actually acknowledged that there was actually someone who took care of the littering in the street. He had always thought that the street was always cleared off by rustling wind but he thought wrong.  
  
He walked past alleys and shops that were still closed in the early morning. The street was deserted, and it was almost eerily quiet. He didn’t know how long he was planning to walk or where he was going, but running as far away as possible from his marriage was probably the wisest decision he could think of at the moment.  
  
After a couple of minutes walking, he realized his steps had brought him near the town’s terminal as he noticed the tall gate a few meters away from him. It was half open, and he wasn’t sure whether it was alright for a mere citizen to pass through. Stepping closer to the gate, he spotted a man in his uniform carrying something that looked like a baseball stick, his back facing him. He was probably out on patrol from the way his figure was stiff while standing in the morning cold air. Baekhyun couldn’t help but pity him for a second because his job was tough. He approached him and cleared his throat before he asked him in a polite manner, “Excuse me.”  
  
The man in the uniform turned his head to him upon hearing his voice and scanned him from head to toe. “Yes. What can I help you?”  
  
“Is the terminal operating yet?” Baekhyun asked.  
  
“Yeah. It’s quiet down here, but we operate 24/7. Are you planning to buy a ticket?”  
  
“I think so. So it’s okay for me to go inside?”  
  
“Of course. There are employees working inside and you can purchase your ticket at the available kiosk. The earliest bus will leave in a couple of minutes.”  
  
“Okay, thanks.” Giving him a slight bow, Baekhyun turned on his heel and walked toward the building.  
  
As soon as he stepped inside the terminal, he purchased a one way ticket to Seoul with the earliest departure. He recalled he didn’t have anyone in the city that he could visit, but he remembered a particular someone told him that Seoul is a city for a lost soul. And right then, Baekhyun was a lost soul. He was alone and he didn’t know any place that he could regard as a home anymore. He didn’t know where he belonged. He believed that even though he still hasn’t had a clear picture of how he was going to survive the following days, walking away from Sehun was the first thing that he needed to do.  
  
  


***

  
  
  
  
The sun was slowly stretching its way up in the horizon when the bus trundled from the depot. It was fully packed with passengers, sitting down in different manners. Some of them sported a grim look as they were looking out from the window. From the look on their faces, it was safe to assume that some others were elated for leaving the town judging by the way their lips tugged up as the scenery outside was fleeting before their eyes. Ahead was still unknown, but he was sure it was brighter than the life he had left behind.  
  
Baekhyun was sitting by the window with his head pressed against the glass. His eyes were fixated upon the passing road. After ten minutes or so he wiped the condensation from the window with a mittened hand and pressed his button nose to the glass. His chest tightened as he remembered he had left his husband behind. He never thought his marriage would come to this point where he would be the one running away from it. Closing his eyes shut, he made sure to push all of the ill thoughts to the back of his head. He was guilty for turning his back on him, but he couldn’t do it anymore. He couldn’t act strong in front of him and act as if nothing happened.  
  
Sehun _had_ betrayed him. He had violated him, and Baekhyun couldn’t find it in him to forgive him so soon. He felt like all of his efforts in keeping his marriage work was futile. He wondered if it had always been like that from the beginning. That it was actually a mistake to agree on a marriage with him. But he loved him. Baekhyun made himself believe that it wasn’t a lie when Sehun showered him with his affection. He was sincere in each word he had ever said to him, and Baekhyun believed it wasn’t a lie either when his husband said he wanted to grow old together with him.  
  
When Sehun proposed to him, it was like a dream come true. He had always hoped that someday Sehun would kneel in front of him with a ring box in his hand, asking him to spend the rest of his life with him. And when that exact moment happened, Baekhyun said yes without a doubt to the most magical question _“Would you marry me?”_ Three times. Because once might not be enough to convince him that he had always wanted to become a part of his life.  
  
Baekhyun believed marriage was supposed to be filled with joy and happiness. He didn’t need to think twice before he said _yes_ because he knew Sehun would be able to make him happy. Sometimes quarrels were also inevitable in their relationship, but he still chose to marry him because marriage was something so beautiful. It was the union of two souls who were meant for each other.  
  
After what had happened between them, he didn’t know if marrying Sehun was the right thing to do. People changed. He wasn’t even sure that Sehun was meant for him.  
  
He loved him. It was a long time ago, _yes_ , but _perhaps_ he had stopped. He had been too preoccupied in keeping their relationship aloof that he didn’t realize he had stopped loving him along the way. Love wouldn’t make him feel tortured. It would let him feel even just a tiniest bit of happiness. But he hadn’t felt that in a long time with him.  
  
What he got was a mix of betrayal and endless sorrow, and instead of feeling complete, he felt empty. At first, it was the kind of pain that he could endure, one that he could sleep through. But as time went by, the emptiness was consuming. He couldn’t bear to pretend that everything was okay when it was actually wasn’t.  
  
A few hours into the journey, the bus was still moving forward to a place Baekhyun had never had a pleasure of visiting. The ragged road made him stir from his sleep when his head slumped to his left shoulder and immediately hit the glass window. Everyone was awake. Everyone was asleep. He took a short nap for the second time, and it lasted for another hour.  
  
When the bus finally pulled over in a rather big terminal, Baekhyun was still deep in his slumber. He promptly jolted up when the man sitting next to him nudged him on the shoulder – informing him that they had arrived in their destination. He thanked the man and retrieved his bag from the luggage compartment. As he stepped out of the bus, he glanced at his wristwatch and took note of the time. It was precisely 11 a.m.. He had practically spent five hours cramped in a small space. He could use a bed and lay down for a couple of hours, but he sighed as he remembered he wasn’t on a trip where usually a room had been booked beforehand. Walking toward the station building, he walked past a hoard of people who seemed to be in a rush carrying their luggage. The station was huge, and it looked more like a shopping mall as there were stores lining up on each side of the building. Baekhyun halted for a moment, deciding on the safest place to sit and figure out where he was going and what he was going to do next.  
  
He ended up perching on the hard seat near the ticketing kiosk and flicked through his phone. There were a couple of messages unread, all of them from Sehun, apologizing for what had happened last night and asking his whereabouts, sort of pleading him to come back home already. He seemed concerned, but Baekhyun was not going home until he felt settled enough. He needed a break. He needed time to think whether it was right all along to keep his marriage working. Taking a moment to scan the area, Baekhyun felt like he was shrinking in his position. He was alone, and he didn’t have anyone to depend on. He knew there was one person he could contact at the moment, but he figured it wouldn’t be too wise to contact him after what he had done to him– _lying_ to him.  
  
After sitting for too long, he decided to get on his feet again and resumed his walk to wherever his feet would lead him. Once he was outside of the station building, the sky was a bright shade of blue above his head. Despite the sunlight that was glaring at him, he blended himself in the mass of people walking on the street. He trudged past people whose faces were all unfamiliar and foreign. Shoulder to shoulder. The faces of the city were judging him from the way their brows knitted when he made eye contact with them. They were looking at him like they had known all along he didn’t belong there.  
  
Baekhyun decided to shift his gaze on to the pavement to avoid eye contact. After a few steps forward, he noticed a crumpled flyer on the ground. Somebody must have littered it carelessly, and being a good citizen he was, he picked it up and held it in his hand since no one even bothered to do so. He scanned the area and found no trash bin standing near to him. Curious, he unfolded the flyer and started reading the content carefully. At a quick glance, he noticed it was apparently a flyer of a gallery exhibition from the way the word exhibition was printed in a bigger font size. He widened his eyes when he noticed a familiar name written on it. _Park Chanyeol_ was written on it along with other names he didn’t have any knowledge of. His breathing almost hitched. He rubbed his eyes to make sure that they weren’t playing tricks on him. When he opened his eyes, his vision was blurred due to the rubbing, but it immediately went back to normal as he focused on the writing one again. He read through the flyer one more time, more thoroughly this time, and it was true that the name was printed on it, bold and clear.  
  
Months had passed since the last time he associated himself with Chanyeol, and Baekhyun had never heard of him anymore ever since he told the other to stay away from him. At first, Chanyeol still insisted to get a hold of him even though he knew about his situation. He texted him and made a few calls, desperate to know how he was doing. Never did Baekhyun reply to any of his messages or made an effort to call him back. He realized it was cruel and unfair to cut the strings between them, but it was _really_ for the best. Sometimes he felt weary whenever he thought about his relationship with Sehun, but he had never intended to jeopardize his marriage. That was why when he felt he was getting closer with Chanyeol, he took an action to prevent an even bigger mistake to happen.  
  
Instead of throwing the flyer to the trash bin, he kept it in his pocket and resumed his walk. He stopped in front of a small café with a vintage decoration. The front door was made out of tinted glass, and when he stepped inside, he noticed spring ornaments in every corner of the shop. There was a bulletin board hanging on the wall with some information about the products that the shop was selling. Baekhyun walked toward a counter and ordered a cup of vanilla latte without cream and a muffin. The cashier took his order with a radiant smile on her face and told him to wait for a couple of minutes until his order was ready to be served.  
  
Baekhyun sat on a seat next to the window. Shrugging off his backpack and his coat, he let out a long exasperated sigh as he leaned against the chair. He could feel his body aching, his head slightly throbbing. He felt restless, and a proper sleep was the only thing he needed at the moment. But he couldn’t afford that because he needed to figure out what he was going to do now that he was somehow stranded in Seoul.  
  
A few minutes later, a steward came to his table with his order. Placing his beverage and chocolate muffin gently on the wooden table in front of him, he flashed a smile and said, “Is there any other thing I can help you with?”  
  
Baekhyun glanced at him before he decided that he could take this as a chance to ask him a few things about the city. “Actually, I have a few questions. Are you busy?”  
  
The servant hesitated before he replied, “Not really. I’m sort of free.”  
  
“Please sit.”  
  
“Okay. So what do you want to ask?”  
  
“Wait a sec.”  
  
Baekhyun fished out the flyer he had kept before in his pocket and handed it over to the worker. When he took it from his hand, he observed the flyer carefully.  
  
“Do you know where is this?”  
  
“ _Apgujeong-gu_ , huh? It’s not too far from here. You just need to pass a few more blocks and cross the street. The building is located near an entertainment company. Just ask around, and they’ll tell you where it’s at.”  
  
“So it’s around here.” Baekhyun muttered to himself, but the worker heard it and made a quick response anyway, “Yeah. Clearly, it says it’s in _Gangnam_. You are in _Gangnam_ now. Are you perhaps not from this area?”  
  
“No, I’m from the countryside. It’s my first time here.”  
  
“Ah, I see. Do you want me to walk you there? I’ll be on a break in a couple of minutes.”  
  
“No, no. It’s okay. I’ll find the address myself, but thanks for the offer. I really appreciate it.”  
  
_“Minseok-aaa~ another order to be served.”_  
  
_“Yes. Coming right up.”_  
  
“I’m sorry, but I have to work again though I really want to accompany you. You seem like you needed someone to chat with.”  
  
“It’s okay. I can manage myself.”  
  
“My name’s Minseok, anyway. I hope you enjoy your visit. And please don’t get lost.” He flashed a smile at Baekhyun.  
  
“Thank you, Minseok- _ssi_.” Chuckling, he extended a hand in front of the servant, “I’m Baekhyun. Don’t worry, I’ll just have to remember this place so I can get back to you if ever I lose my way around.”  
  
A couple of minutes had passed since Baekhyun and the server engaged in a conversation. The coffee shop was not as empty as it had been a few moments prior. The chairs were now occupied with customers with at least a cup of coffee on the table. Taking the last sip of his vanilla latte, he tidied up his crumpled shirt in his position and stood up. Tightening the grip of the backpack slumped on his shoulders, he left the table and exited the café, waving to the guy that he recalled the name was Minseok.  
  
Once he was outside, he was greeted with a gust of fresh air, the warm sunlight sparkling and dancing on his bare arms. Baekhyun hummed a tune as he admired every tall, elegant building he passed by, his pupils dilating and his mouth turning into an ‘o’ shape every now and then. It was true what they said about _Gangnam_ being extravagant and all. It was almost like an area for Seoulites with high social status. There were clothing shops with fancy brands whose name Baekhyun couldn’t even spell lining up on both sides of the street. Behind the tinted glass, the latest products were displayed, and Baekhyun could only glance from the outside without any intention to ever step inside. He was never interested in fashion, and he probably could never afford a single product sold in there with his monthly paycheck.  
  
When he realized he had walked past three blocks, a cross road was already in front of him. If he were to cross the road and walked a few more miles, he could have reached the place that was on the flyer, but the question was, did he really want to go there? Was it okay for him to go there? What if the guy he wanted so much to avoid happened to be there and coincidentally bumped into him? He wasn’t prepared for the occurrence to happen.  
  
Honestly Baekhyun didn’t know what he wanted. His logic was telling him to keep away from Chanyeol. That was the reason why he never made an effort to contact him anymore. Now that he was probably only a few miles away from the said man, he couldn’t lie to himself that he didn’t want to see him even just for a second. He wanted to trail his fingers down his face and tell him how much he had missed him, how much he had missed his presence in his life and how much he had missed talking to him. Baekhyun didn’t know since when it had begun but Chanyeol had become a source of happiness when Sehun couldn’t properly fulfill his role. He brought happiness to his life, a smile to his face because Baekhyun smiled more often and laughed more heartily when Chanyeol was around.  
  
Lost in his thought, he was suddenly brought into focus when he realized he had reached the end of the crossroad. He asked one of the passerby about the building that he’d been looking for. He successfully obtained information on his first attempt, and without wasting time, he headed toward the destination. He didn’t have any pride left in him anyway as he remembered his hus band had squeezed it out of him completely.  
  
Once he located the building, he stopped in front of it. It was a minimalist building with a pop up banner placed before the front door, indicating that there was an event going on at the moment. The content of the banner was pretty much the same with what was written on the flyer, but with more additional information about the opening hours.  
  
After much dispute going on in his head, Baekhyun walked inside with confident strides. He thought it would be a good thing if he asked the receptionist first before going straight into the hall, so he approached the receptionist table and asked the person behind the counter, “How do I enter the exhibition?”  
  
“It’s for public. You can look around. If there’s a photograph that interests you, we will be glad to tell you the details.”  
  
“Okay. Thank you.” She insisted on accompanying him while looking around, but Baekhyun refused. He only let her show him the entrance door.  
  
He was led into where the exhibition took place, and when he was inside the spacious hall, he thanked her. “I’ll take a look around by myself.”  
  
There weren’t many patrons around as he scanned his surroundings. In every corner of the room, however, framed photographs were plastered on the wall in an organized manner. They were grouped and arranged alphabetically according to participating artists. The photographs were taken in different parts of South Korea, showing people in their everyday life. The moments that were depicted in the pictures were mostly candid, and it told a lot about them. At first glance, as Baekhyun observed the photographs carefully, he noticed there were many differences in the lifestyle, yet there was still an element that was common everywhere. That was the feeling of loneliness and alienation people experience no matter where they were.  
  
As he reached the corner of the spacious hall, he knew he was looking at the photographs taken by someone he knew. It wasn’t because he’d seen his name carved on the corner of the frame, but it was because of what was in the frame.  
  
Baekhyun was bemused. Surprise was probably not sufficient to describe what he felt at the moment when he saw his face plastered all over the wall. Every countenance of his face was successfully captured by the hands of the expert that was Chanyeol’s from when he looked upset to he looked content. They were there. He didn’t have a single thought that Chanyeol would make his project all about him.  
  
He walked closer to the wall, bringing an index to trail down the glass framed photograph, staring at it carefully. It was a picture of him bending down to tie up his shoelaces. He had no idea why Chanyeol would ever turn such event into some kind of a concept. The only reason he could think of that Chanyeol must have had dropped his muse somewhere and replaced it with something that was not even close to being admirable.  
  
He could feel his heart thumping in his chest as he identified each of the photographs. It was as if he could look into Chanyeol’s soul. The pictures were telling him, metaphorically speaking, that the photographer cherished every moment he had with him. He felt affection, honesty, and sincerity from every picture Chanyeol had taken. He didn’t miss any details of Baekhyun’s features, and Baekhyun was overwhelmed.  
  
“It’s a nice photograph, isn’t it?”  
  
A deep voice that sounded too familiar was caught in his ear. His hunch had been proved right when he tilted his head to the owner of the voice. He was so immersed in his previous action that he didn’t notice someone had been standing beside him. Looking up, his breath hitched when he caught a pair of brown eyes staring at him.  
  
“Chanyeol…”  
  
Baekhyun froze in his position. It was to be expected that he might bump into the photographer one way or another considering that it was his exhibition after all. What he didn’t expect was to meet him so soon. So close that he had to remind himself that he wasn’t dreaming.  
  
“Didn’t expect to see you here.” Chanyeol said, a hint of firmness laced in his voice.  
  
Baekhyun was still stunned, unable to utter a single word as he fixated his gaze upon the taller standing beside him who pretended to observe the photograph rather than to face him.  
  
As he was standing there – still in his position, his mind wandered off to the moment when he had first met him. It was supposed to be just a brief encounter between two strangers entangled in an awkward situation. If only Chanyeol didn’t take a picture of him, he wouldn’t have confronted him, and Chanyeol wouldn’t have an excuse to want to meet him again. But they did. They met again, and they had gotten close. Too close that he had to take action and push him away.  
  
His vision blurred as he felt the world spinning before him. Before he could give Chanyeol a response he deserved, his skin turned ashen. It was as if his heart had suddenly stop beating and all the blood in his veins had run down to his feet. He didn’t know whether it was because of the fatigue or meeting Chanyeol, but he knew that he would collapse anytime soon. He swayed for a moment, and Chanyeol caught him in a haste of moment. The continuous chant of “are you okay?” that sounded clear had become distant in his ears, and the last thing he remembered was Chanyeol lowering him to the ground before his vision darkened and he fell unconscious.  
  
  


***

  
  
  
  
Chanyeol was carrying Baekhyun on his back from the parking lot to his apartment that was only fifteen minutes away from the gallery. The petite guy felt a little heavy but he didn’t care. When Baekhyun collapsed at the gallery, nobody he knew was around except the receptionist. He thought it would take too much time to call an emergency number for help, so he decided to lift him up and bring him to his car instead and take him to his apartment.  
  
When he was already in front of his apartment door, he unlocked the door with his right hand while his other hand was still supporting Baekhyun lying unconscious on his back. The door creaked open, and he successfully made his way in. The room was almost dark, but there was a faint light peeking through the crevices of the glass window, illuminating the room and allowing him to proceed toward the couch without stumbling. Placing the man gently on the sofa, he checked his temperature as he brought his palm to rest on his temple. To his surprise, it was slightly burning under his touch, his lips pale, but the tip of his feet was as cold as ice. He rushed to fetch the first aid kit box in the kitchen drawer and prepare some medicine for him. When he came back with a few strips of medicine in his hand and a basin of warm water with a folded small towel, Baekhyun was still unconscious. Shaking the brunet gently on the shoulder while chanting his name softly, he didn’t get any response.  
  
A week had passed since the exhibition of Seoul Street Photography was officially opened. Being one of the photographers participating in the event, he had been preoccupied with so many things– starting from meeting the attendants who were interested in buying his work and doing an interview for a magazine simply to just share his opinion and thoughts regarding the event. To put it simply, he had been physically and emotionally drained.  
  
He didn’t have time to think of anything aside of his work. After a couple of months of not hearing anything from Baekhyun, he had been trying to get over him and forget the kiss they shared. Now that he was trying to move on, he just had to come again into his life.  
  
He couldn’t almost believe his eyes when he took the sight of the view in front of him. He never expected a chance to meet him again, let alone having him unconscious in his apartment. There were so many questions that he wanted to ask to him. So many thoughts that he wanted to convey.  
  
Even after Baekhyun told him to forget him, he couldn’t do it completely. It wasn’t easy to forget something when your mind was already set to remember every bit of it. And when he looked at Baekhyun, he missed him even more. He yearned for him even more, and he loved him more than he already did. Baekhyun looked so angelic when he was unconscious like this, it made him want to trail a finger down the side of his face.  
  
But he couldn’t do it, could he? Not when he knew Baekhyun was not his to begin with.  
  
_His._ It pained him so much to accept the reality that he would never be _his_. He still remembered how he had made it clear that he already belonged to someone _– and_ that he wouldn’t want to have anything to do with him anymore.  
  
So Chanyeol only looked at him. He looked at him like a man would look at his lover – fond and full of sincerity. He looked at him like he would never be able to see him again. He made sure that he wouldn’t waste this chance because when Baekhyun woke up, it would be hard to look at him in the eyes without feeling guilty. He was guilty because he had fallen head over heels for him, guilty because he’d crossed the line that he should have never crossed. Guilty because all this time he had hoped for something that was beyond his reach.  
  
His thoughts were forgotten as he heard a low grunt from the man resting next to him a couple of minutes after he had been treated properly,. He jolted up immediately from his position and nudged him lightly on the shoulder before he asked, eyes filled with concern, “Hey, are you okay?”  
  
Baekhyun attempted to straighten his back but failed half the way and fell back again on the couch. Chanyeol stopped him from moving by pushing him back slightly on the shoulder as he tried to make another attempt. The exhaustion pooling in his body must have not gone away, but at least he looked much better than he was half an hour ago after getting some rest. His temperature was still a bit high as Chanyeol tried to check on him but his face was not as pale as before.  
  
“Um.. Chanyeol?” he questioned, looking up at him with droopy eyes.  
  
Scooting closer, Chanyeol answered, “Yes, I’m here.”  
  
“Did I faint? Where am I?”  
  
“Yes, Baek. You’re in my apartment now.”  
  
“Oh... thanks. You could’ve just taken me to the hospital.”  
  
“I know, right?” he chuckled nervously. “But it’s fine. I know a thing or two about treating someone, so yeah... Are you feeling better?”  
  
“I think I’m okay now. My head’s still throbbing a little, but I’m alright.” Baekhyun said lowly, his gaze shifted occasionally from Chanyeol to the not-so-unfamiliar scene surrounding him. He looked very much in a daze as he scanned his surroundings.  
  
“So this is how your apartment looks like. I always wondered.” He said absentmindedly, “It’s nice. Such a waste of expense and money that you live alone here.”  
  
“Yeah. Thanks. It’s nice, but it feels empty, though, since I’m only living by myself.”  
  
Somehow Baekhyun could relate to that. He knew how lonely it could get for the other to live alone since he had also been living by himself. The feeling of emptiness of being confined in a space – no matter how comfortable it was – where nobody was going to look after you when you were sick or prepare your meal when you were hungry. It was a bitter feeling, and knowing that Chanyeol was _used to_ that, it pained Baekhyun a little.  
  
Chanyeol was a nice guy. Even though Baekhyun had only known him for a few months, he could tell that Chanyeol was not the type who liked to fool around. He showed him his true self through his action and for that, he deserved someone who would take care of him and looked after him sincerely.  
  
“My house… It’s twice bigger than this. There were so many furnitures, various kinds of paintings, different types of wine stacked nicely on the kitchen counter, but it all seemed like a waste since I’m the only one who enjoyed the luxury.”  
  
Chanyeol glanced at Baekhyun through his lashes. The house he was referring to was probably the one he shared together with his husband. It was nauseating for Chanyeol to think what must have had happened between the married couple under the roof. He was the same Baekhyun he had gotten close with during his stay in Jinhae, but for some reasons his heart ached now that the reality seemed to became clearer and hit him in the face.  
  
“But you have your husband.” he said, taking a gulp of air into his air, swallowing the truth.  
  
“You’re right. A husband.” he chuckled bitterly.  
  
Chanyeol wondered what he was actually trying to tell him, but he couldn’t read the expression on his face. Baekhyun didn’t need to be reminded that he was someone else’s husband. He shouldn’t have made Chanyeol remind him that he already belonged to someone else.  
  
Patting the brunet on the shoulders, he stood up, “For now, I’ll let you rest. But we still need to talk.”  
  
Baekhyun was quick to prevent himself from leaving as he grabbed his wrist, “Chanyeol?”  
  
“Yes? Do you need anything else?”  
  
“Thank you, and… actually, I ran away from home.”  
  
Chanyeol lingered his gaze at Baekhyun for a couple of seconds, stupefied because how could Baekhyun say something so obtrusively like that. Why did he run away from home? And more importantly; why _did_ he run away from his husband?  
  
Chanyeol didn’t give him any response because he wasn’t capable of giving one at the moment. There were so many questions running in his mind; all of them were asking about why Baekhyun did this, why Baekhyun did that, and he couldn’t stop it. He couldn’t stop his mind from continuously asking himself what happened between him and his husband. But he was still standing there – a few metres away from Baekhyun as his eyes were searching for something in him – something that was akin to seriousness. Because he wasn’t sure Baekhyun was being serious. He wasn’t sure he heard it right.  
  
“I didn’t come to Seoul to look for you– no, and I wasn’t expecting to see you either. I just– I just wanted to escape the town. It’s too suffocating. I don’t think I’ll be able to continue living there. Not anymore.”  
  
“But you shouldn’t have run away. I don’t know what must have happened between you and your husband, but you have to work it through with him.” he said calmly, his heart shattering a little.  
  
With a little push, his other hand loosened the grip on his wrist. Chanyeol wanted more than anything to calm him, to tell him that everything would be okay. Could he do that? Could he at least be selfish for a moment and _hope_ that, perhaps, Baekhyun would look at him the way he looked at his husband? Would he ever consider his presence? He didn’t even know if things were actually okay between Baekhyun and his husband. Suppose if it weren’t okay between them, then … what? Where did that leave him? He was still just somebody that Baekhyun met in the street.  
  
Resuming his pace to shuffle away from him and escape the scene, he stopped in his tracks when Baekhyun continued to say something, eyes never leaving him, “I didn’t want to solve my problem that’s why I ran away from him.”  
  
Chanyeol didn’t know why he had to listen to this. He didn’t know why Baekhyun told him about this. About his marriage. It was Baekhyun who wanted him to be gone from his life, wasn’t he? It was him who warned him not to fall for him. It was him who wanted him to walk away from his life – to forget him and to never call him again. But why was Baekhyun here telling him about how his marriage seemed to have fallen apart? Why was he trying to make it difficult for Chanyeol to move on?  
  
What _would_ he want him to do?  
  
He thought he was over him since the moment he had tried to push him away from his life, but he _wasn’t_. He was a fool for Baekhyun and he had always been since the moment he laid his eyes on him.  
  
“It’s tiring, Chanyeol,” sighing, Baekhyun cupped his face with his hand, his shoulders shaking as if preventing a sob that was threatening to spill out. “I gave him my heart, but it seemed like– it seemed like I was not even there. He is too much. I don’t know what I should do anymore.”  
  
Chanyeol wanted to rush over him and let Baekhyun cry as much as he wanted on his shoulder, but he couldn’t do that. He couldn’t let him know that he still cared for him. He wouldn’t want him know that no matter what happened between him and his husband, Chanyeol would never be able to stop loving him.  
  
“Since when have you been here? In Seoul?”  
  
“This afternoon. I came here because I didn’t know where to go. But I remember once, you told me Seoul is for everyone. Even a lost soul like me could fit in it, so I tried my luck coming here.”  
  
“It’s true, but aren’t you afraid of getting lost? You should’ve contacted me.”  
  
“I’m a grown man, Yeol. I can take care of myself. Besides, I didn’t come here to look for you. How could I contact you when I was the jerk one who pushed you away?”  
  
“Then can you explain why you were at my gallery? You know you would bump into me, but you still came.”  
  
“I know, right? Maybe I still hoped along the way I would get to meet you even though I knew the chance was so little. And look at me now, sitting in your apartment like it’s the most natural thing to do. What kind of fate is God playing on us?”  
  
“I don’t know, Baek. You didn’t even reply to my messages. Do I need to remind you that you pushed me away? You did that to me. And now, now that you’re here... I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.” Chanyeol ran a hair through his hair, frustrated at the whole situation he was in. He turned on his heels and proceeded to sit on the empty space next to him.  
  
Chanyeol blamed himself, _really_. He blamed himself for accepting Baekhyun’s offer to help him with the project. He blamed himself for being comfortable when he wasn’t supposed to.  
  
He blamed himself for _falling_ for him.  
  
Baekhyun had that unreadable facial expression when Chanyeol glanced at him through his lashes. It was a mix of sorrow and Chanyeol sighed as he walked away from Baekhyun. He remembered it was the other who once walked away from him, but right then, when Baekhyun was alone and vulnerable, he was the one who pushed him away.  
  
“You need to go home. Tomorrow.”  
  
He left the room without looking back. A breathe of fresh air and a drag of cigarette was what he needed the most at the moment so he proceeded to the balcony and leaned against the railing as soon as he got there. He took one cigar from the pack that he had retrieved beforehand from his pocket and lit up the cigar with a lighter. He inhaled slowly, letting the nicotine linger in his mouth for a while before it travelled down to his lungs. He puffed on it steadily and ribbons of smoke continued to waft out of his nostrils. He was delighted when the familiar feeling of tobacco wrapped his lungs like a warm blanket, making him feel very much alive and at ease. Chanyeol was not the type who took cigarettes on a daily basis. He only let the nicotine consume his system whenever his mind was bothered with something, and right then, he wasn’t in his rightest state of mind because a certain man had been constantly running in his mind and making his life miserable.  
  
From where he was standing, he could see stars swirling and touching one another in the night sky above him like a pitch-black curtain draped over the sky with glitters scattered all over it. Chanyeol extended his arm to reach the sky with his hand as he closed one of his eyes. It looked as if he could scoop the twinkling stars with his hand, but the fact was that they were so far away in the sky. In his vision, they were close, but they were actually distant that he cannot feel their warmth even though they were made of burning. And Baekhyun was _like_ the glitter in the sky. In Chanyeol’s vision, he was close, but he had always been out of his reach from the moment he laid eyes on him. He had never thought such a bitter fact would be possible until the other revealed the truth about his marriage in his face. It had been painful for him to embrace the fact that Baekhyun had been lying to him all this time about his status. When he first heard it, he almost thought Baekhyun was pulling some kind of prank at him, but he knew he wasn’t because the moment he laughed at the outburst, Baekhyun was already shooting daggering stares at him.  
  
It was the worst feeling– knowing the person that you like won’t ever like you back because he already had someone important in his life was truly the feeling anyone should never have experienced. There was a dull ache in his heart that had been starting to grow and reside permanently in his chest ever since Baekhyun revealed the bitter truth.  
  
He couldn’t blame Baekhyun. How could he blame him when he never explicitly told him that he was single or that he was interested in him. Baekhyun was just being too _kind_ to him and he was such a fool for thinking that he might’ve had feelings for him too.  
  
Taking a quick glance at his wristwatch, he noticed that he had spent almost an hour standing on the balcony. When he realized he ran out of cigarettes in his pack, he left the area and went back to his room. Walking past the couch, he halted as he saw the brunet’s figure sprawled on the soft material. Baekhyun was already in deep slumber.  
  
He took a few steps closer, observing every detail of his features. When he looked at him like this, it hurt so much sometimes. He loved everything about him, but he couldn’t do anything because it would be wrong to make a move on him now that he already knew _everything_. He wouldn’t forgive himself if he dared to do something that he was sure he would regret later on even if he wanted to.  
  
He glanced at the small table standing next to the couch. Placed on top of it was the brunet’s cellphone along with his wristwatch. Carefully, Chanyeol took the phone and swiped it open. He was a little bit surprised when he found out that it didn’t have a passcode. There were a couple of missed calls coming from Baekhyun’s husband and a lot of messages asking his whereabouts. Right then, he realized that it wasn’t right for Baekhyun to be with him even if there was a problem between him and his husband. He should’ve solved it with him.  
  
He belonged to his husband, and it was perhaps Chanyeol’s duty to bring him back to his _home_.  
  
  


***

  
  
  
  
The next day, morning came too early as Chanyeol could feel a ray of light peeking through the crevices of his closed curtains. He jolted up in his bed and proceeded to the bathroom. After he got dressed, he went outside of the room to find Baekhyun.  
  
When he was in the living room, he was surprised to see that the couch was empty. He looked in every corner of the room, hoping that the other was still inside of his apartment. And to his relief, Baekhyun was still there. He was sitting on the floor near the kitchen counter with his back slumped against the wall. He had his had buried in his folded arms.  
  
“Baekhyun?”  
  
Chanyeol crouched down a little, trying to level his position with him. Baekhyun only looked up at him, not saying anything in return.  
  
“I’ve prepared a warm bath for you.” Chanyeol said.  
  
“Thanks. I’ll get ready soon.”  
  
“Okay.”  
  
“You know you don’t have to do this.”  
  
“Baekhyun, look at me, I don’t know what happened between you and him. It’s your problem to solve, but I won’t let you wander out here without a plan. Seoul is a big city, and even though I told you living here is convenient and all, it’s still dangerous. I’d rather take you home.”  
  
Nodding his head in agreement, Baekhyun let Chanyeol help him stand on his feet.  
  
It took him around half an hour to wash himself up and get ready to come back _home._ Baekhyun thought it wasn’t necessary for Chanyeol to tag along with him to Jinhae but he couldn’t refuse when Chanyeol insisted on doing so no matter what he said.  
  
As soon as they reached the train station, Chanyeol purchased two tickets to Jinhae and went toward the counter to redeem them before they could get on the carriage. Baekhyun trailed after him like a lost puppy who didn’t know how to read signs. He didn’t question anything during their walk to the carriage that seemed like a couple of torturing years.  
  
To be completely honest, he didn’t understand why he complied when Chanyeol wanted him to come back home. Wasn’t the only reason he was in Seoul because he couldn’t bear to be in his home again? Didn’t he run away because he didn’t want to even look at Sehun’s face again? At least not for the time being– not after what he had done to him.  
  
Baekhyun sat next to Chanyeol on the way back to Jinhae but they didn’t talk much. He checked on his phone for the last time before the train started to move. There were a couple of missed calls for someone he had been trying so hard to avoid. He let out a sigh before he turned his head to look at Chanyeol who was sitting next to him.  
  
  


***

  
  
  
  
It was still afternoon when they arrived in Jinhae. It had only been a few months since the photographer left the town, but it felt like he hadn’t been there for a long time. The town still looked the same no matter how much he looked at it. It was still eerily quiet, and it still made the hair on his nape stand when the air got a little bit too chilly.  
  
He was _used_ to it, though. Having spent a few months there made him learn how to adjust living in a place where the road wasn’t as big as the one in the city, the buildings weren’t as tall as the ones he’d seen every day, and the people weren’t as many as he’d seen in the subway. What he wasn’t used to was walking beside Baekhyun – knowing so well that he wasn’t the same Baekhyun he had known.  
  
They had walked a few miles from the station to the area where there were more patrons wandering on the street when Baekhyun suddenly stopped in his tracks and turned his head to the side, facing him, “You should go.”  
  
“No, I’ll take you home, Baek, what if you run away again? I can’t afford to even imagine you out there wandering around at some place you don’t even know. What if something bad happens to you? What if you get hurt?”  
  
Sighing, Baekhyun only hung his head low, avoiding any chances of eye contact with the latter. He felt his heart tightening in his chest, and it suddenly left him breathless. He wanted to get angry at him. He didn’t want Chanyeol to get worried over him. He hated when Chanyeol was being nice like this.  
  
“Just go.”  
  
“No. I’ve made up my mind. I’m not going to let you get away from my sight until I see you come back home.”  
  
“Fine. I’ll let you walk me home, but can you do me a favor?”  
  
Arching a brow, Chanyeol loosened up a little and asked, “Okay. What is it?”  
  
“Can we take a walk until the sun sets? We still have a couple of hours. I just– I don’t want to come back home yet when my mind is not really that settled. I’m not ready.”  
  
“But–”  
  
“Please, Chanyeol. Will you do that for me? This is the last thing I’ll ask of you.”  
  
_But you never asked something from me, though._  
  
“Okay, fine, if that’s what you want. I’ll be with you until you feel ready to come home. Is there some place you would like to go? Somewhere that could make you feel calm?”  
  
Chanyeol could only think of one place that could make Baekhyun feel a lot better than before. A place that could make him forget about all of the burden that was weighing on his shoulders. A place that could make him remember what it felt like to be happy.  
  
“I don’t know. If you’re thinking of taking me to the park, then I’ll have to politely refuse the offer.”  
  
“Should I be afraid that you kind of read people’s minds now?”  
  
Baekhyun laughed a little at his question. It was the kind of laugh that made Chanyeol’s heart flutter.  
  
“Why don’t you wanna go to the park? It’s your favorite place.”  
  
“I just don’t feel like going there.” Baekhyun replied, and he hummed a tune Chanyeol was not really familiar with.  
  
“Ah! Have you heard about _Gunhangje_? How about we go there?”  
  
“Isn’t it one of the biggest festivals in Korea?” he asked.  
  
“Yes, it usually starts this time around. I suppose we could walk along the stream and wait for the fireworks at night.”  
  
“Okay. That would be great.”  
  
  


***

  
  
  
  
It was three in the afternoon when they arrived at where _Gunhangje_ was held. It was considered as one of the biggest festivals in Korea since it could attract approximately two million visitors every year. One could say that it was a spectacular event for there were many cherry blossom trees lining up along the stream where you couldn’t find it anywhere but here, and you could get to see this view by paying a ticket to enter the festival. Under the sky that almost turned into a darker shade of yellow, they walked along the stream where cherry blossoms lined along both sides of it, forming a seemingly white tunnel. It was a beautiful sight that Baekhyun was used to seeing every year. It was always the same every year in Spring. The trees budded with leaves and flowers were all in bloom this time around. When he looked up to the sky, the birds seemed more active and the sky was much brighter.  
  
They walked along the trees tunnel in silence, enjoying the surroundings. Baekhyun could almost picture himself walking on the same path with a certain someone with intertwined hands. He always liked it when his husband brought him here just to wander around and get lost in long conversations as they walked along the stream. He _was_ happy because he was still Sehun’s number one priority back then when they were still dating. He remembered a lot of memories of him with his husband, but he didn’t want to relive them because he knew he wasn’t ever going to regain his love back again.  
  
He didn’t know if Sehun did really cheat on him but he doubted if he was still in love with him. If he did, he wouldn’t let another man come into his life just like Baekhyun didn’t let Chanyeol come into his life and stay for too long.  
  
Even before he found out about his affair, he should have noticed that he had grown cold in every action he had shown him. Baekhyun was the one who always invented the excuse of staying when Sehun had always given him every reason to leave.  
  
Because he thought it was worth the try. He thought his marriage deserved to be saved.  
  
Like a lovesick fool, he still ignored the fact that Sehun had stopped loving him. He had stopped telling him how much he was in love with him. He had been blind all this time to think that Sehun still had feelings left for him when he never even made any efforts to make feel him loved. When he was home, instead of making up for the time he had missed with him, he was always distracted. His phone was always in his hand, and Baekhyun should have known better than anyone that he had let Sehun crush him into million pieces.  
  
“We’ve been walking for quite a while. Aren’t you tired?” Chanyeol’s voice brought him back into focus.  
  
He kept his gaze fixated on the side of the taller’s features as he walked next to him in silence. He was _hurt_ , but he couldn’t comprehend why there were fuzzy feelings pooling in his stomach. The feeling was so strange, and it stretched throughout his whole body. It was overwhelming. Being with Chanyeol made him feel as though he was in peace. With Sehun, he was always anxious because he didn’t know when he would leave him again.  
  
He wasn’t the type who could easily fall in love, but he realized he had fallen too easily. Whenever he was with Chanyeol, it felt like he didn’t know who his husband was anymore. It hurt him, but it made feel good at the same time.  
  
Chanyeol had been so kind to him, and he had never intended to hurt him in the first place had he known lying to him would only give him pain.  
  
Baekhyun didn’t answer his question. Walking toward the side of the wooden railing, he stood by it and stared at river flowing underneath. It took him a lot of courage to finally able to look at him and ask him a question, “Chanyeol-ah, can I ask you something?  
  
“Yeah, ask away.”  
  
“Why did you put up a lot of pictures of me?”  
  
Chanyeol was taken aback. Taking a few seconds to think of an appropriate response to the question, he stood next to Baekhyun, his back leaning against the railing, before he replied, “You mean those pictures in the exhibition? Does that bother you?”  
  
“Yeah, and no, not really. I just wonder why. I knew you were doing a project, but I never thought it would be all about me.”  
  
“I’m sorry I never told you about it. I didn’t even ask your permission when I took them.”  
  
“It’s fine. I actually don’t really care about that. But why is it me?”  
  
“Just because.”  
  
“You should have a reason.”  
  
“Do you really want to know?”  
  
“I guess, _yes_.”  
  
“You know, it wasn’t actually supposed to be about you. It’s about the town, but whenever I looked back to the time when I was here, I could only think of you.”  
  
Baekhyun stopped in his track. Tilting his head to the side, he was flustered when he realized Chanyeol was already staring.  
  
“You were my muse, Baek. You still are. It might sound too cheesy, but the first time I saw you on the street, I believed that there was nothing more alluring than you, more captivating than you standing in the middle of the quiet street. I couldn’t stop thinking about you the moment I set my eyes on you.”  
  
“So when you met me in the park.. that wasn’t your first time seeing me?”  
  
“Yeah. I don’t know how it is possible for me to feel so much for a stranger, a passerby, but I wanted to get a closer look at you so I ran after you, but when I got out of the café, you were gone, and I couldn’t find you.”  
  
“I see.”  
  
“Is that the only response you could give me?”  
  
“Well, it turns out that I don’t know what to say because you just practically admitted I’m your muse.” Baekhyun said as he felt his cheeks turn redder.  
  
“Because you are.”  
  
  


***

  
  
  
  
Spring was not his favorite season, but Chanyeol liked the color of the petals that contrasted against the wood. He also liked the gentle breeze and a hint of warmth in the air that only Spring could bring. He liked how the weather was not so cold, but it was the kind that felt like a kiss of summer without the fiery heat of noon time in August. As he looked under the bridge, he noticed the remnants of snow had entirely vanished and the rivers swelled with the melt water.  
  
Seasons had changed, but he would be lying if he said his feelings for Baekhyun had also changed. Going back to this town brought back all the memories he had with him that had been buried somewhere in the back of his mind. It was just a right thing to do, to forget Baekhyun when he knew he didn’t even stand a chance to be with him. He had promised to himself after this ended – after he had brought Baekhyun back to where he belonged, he would leave him for good. Chanyeol had to leave Baekhyun for good because it was the right thing to do.  
  
Even if he loved Baekhyun, he couldn’t do anything about it. He couldn’t chase after him because it was simply absurd to chase after something that he already knew he wouldn’t get. It made him angry because he was the one who had to walk away. He was angry he had to be the one who sacrificed his love. But what could he do? Unrequited love had always been a tragedy. And it applied the same to him.  
  
It somehow infuriated him to the point he wanted to hate Baekhyun for lying to him since the beginning. He could have saved himself from a greater pain if only Baekhyun had been honest with him from the start. But he couldn’t hate Baekhyun even though he wanted to. His heart refused to hate him even though he tried to. Being away from him made him realize it was never the physical love which made it special, it was something different – a connection between two souls.  
  
Chanyeol noticed how Baekhyun was walking unusually slow like he had so much going on in his head. He wanted to ask what happened. He wanted to tell him everything would be okay no matter what happened, but he couldn’t. Baekhyun looked too vulnerable right now, and he knew it would be rude to meddle into his problems. Baekhyun didn’t seem to want to talk about it either, so Chanyeol better not bring it up.  
  
They had early dinner after they had been walking around. Baekhyun had offered to take him to the nearest restaurant, and Chanyeol could only comply because he wasn’t really picky when it came to food. Baekhyun was mostly quiet, but they still conversed a little conversation even though it was always Chanyeol who started asking him questions.  
  
By the time they got out of the restaurant, the light of day had already drained away, giving way to dusky colors to illuminate the darkening sky. The streetlights had been turned on, and he noticed how the cherry blossom trees had also turned into a yellowish tunnel as the Romance Bridge was decorated with lights and illuminations.  
  
Chanyeol was mesmerized at the sight, and he wished he had brought his camera with him so he could shoot the attractive view in front of him.  
  
“It’s pretty, isn’t it?”  
  
“I can’t believe I’ve never been here before. I thought my friend was exaggerating when he told me how magnificent it was when he came to this event. Now that I saw it myself, I’m really speechless. It’s pretty.”  
  
Baekhyun only let out a small chuckle at his rambling before he asked, “Don’t you wanna know what it’s called?”  
  
“What do you mean?”  
  
“That pretty thing that is decorating the cherry blossoms. It’s still part of the spring festival.”  
  
“I didn’t know about it. What is it called?”  
  
“We call it _Yeojwacheon_ Starlight Festival. It’s like still part of the big event where in the evening, laser lights and illuminations decorate _Yeojwacheon_ Stream and Romance Bridge, the bridge we’re standing on right now. The atmosphere is really different from daytime, don’t you think?”  
  
“Yeah, I thought we’re in a different place. It’s really amazing. Should we take a picture?”  
  
“Did you bring your camera?”  
  
“Sadly, I didn’t. I would’ve been too preoccupied with it if I brought it along with me.”  
  
“Yeah. You would’ve taken a lot of pictures already by now.”  
  
They took the picture when there weren’t too many patrons around them. Baekhyun was standing under the cherry blossom trees and he brought his hands into his jacket pocket as he smiled at the camera.  
  
“Now it’s your turn.”  
  
Chanyeol didn’t hesitate to walk over to claim his spot under the tree. And when Baekhyun counted backwards, Chanyeol stretched a smile on his face as he made a v-pose.  
  
Baekhyun stepped closer to him to show him the result. Chanyeol liked it even though it didn’t turn out _that_ good. It was still decent.  
  
As the night was getting late, the area was slowly getting much more crowded than before. People were chattering with their partners; whining about their work life that he could almost hear what they were talking about.  
  
He remembered Baekhyun told him that there was going to be a firework even so he asked the officer to make sure if it was true.  
  
Just before he could excuse himself to ask the officer about the firework schedule, a loud boom was heard echoing in the sky. When he looked up, the fiery sparks had already burst through dark night, decorating the pitch-black sky with its blooms among the stars. The fireworks exploded in different vivid colors, bursting continuously with impatience just like a working camera flash.  
  
Each of the firework drew different patterns into the sky, and Chanyeol could notice from his position how Baekhyun was awestruck by the sight. He fished out his phone to capture the beautiful sight before the vivacious colors extinguished to blackness.  
  
“I never knew you like fireworks that much.” Chanyeol pointed out.  
  
“Doesn’t everyone like fireworks? They’re just full of colors and sudden, moving sparks. What makes it more mesmerizing is that they can only last for a short period of time.”  
  
“And they’re in the sky! I think I like everything that’s in the sky.”  
  
Chanyeol only flashed a warm smile at him. He, too, liked the sky, and whenever he looked at it, it always reminded him of Baekhyun because he was just like the sky. No matter what he did, he would never reach him. He would only ever be able to admire him from afar.  
  
“Chanyeol? I think I have to say that I’m sorry.”  
  
Chanyeol was quick to raise his brow, “What are you sorry for?”  
  
“I’m sorry for lying to you... for pushing you away. I was so cruel, and I only thought of myself when I asked you to stay away from me. I didn’t really mean it.”  
  
“It’s okay. You did the right thing.“ he said, flashing a sincere smile at him.  
  
“Can I ask you something personal?”  
  
Raising a brow, he asked, “What is it?”  
  
“Have you ever been in a relationship before?”  
  
“Why would you ask that?”  
  
“I’m just curious. You’ve never really told me about it.”  
  
Chanyeol stretched his lips into a thin line, flicking his tongue, “Well, there’s nothing to tell. I’ve never had a real relationship.”  
  
Of course Chanyeol had been in a relationship. But he never really talked about his relationship to anyone. Baekhyun wasn’t just anyone, but he still thought it wasn’t important. He was just one of million guys who happened to have a bad luck in it. As he could recall, it was a year ago when his ex-boyfriend, Junmyeon, dumped him for no particular reason on their second anniversary. Chanyeol had a gut feeling that he was being cheated on, but he didn’t care anymore. It was all in the past, and he was already over him. He had never had any more serious relationship ever since.  
  
“What? I don’t believe you.” Baekhyun tilted his head to the side and crossed his arms as if to challenge the taller.  
  
“It’s true. I’m very hard to get.”  
  
“Not even once?”  
  
“It’s hard for me to be honest.”  
  
Baekhyun shifted his gaze to the blooming cherry blossoms, sighing, “It’s okay. I’ve never been really honest about myself to you, though.”  
  
“Baek... It’s not your fault. I might understand why you lied to me. I’m not mad, and I already accepted the fact that you’re married and that there is no way for me to even make a move on you anymore.”  
  
He sighed when Baekhyun only hung his head low, “Do you wanna talk about it?”  
  
“I... I wanna talk about it. But I just don’t know where I should start.”  
  
Chanyeol took hold of Baekhyun’s hand in his and gave him a light comforting squeeze. He didn’t miss the way Baekhyun flinch at his touch.  
  
“It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me.”  
  
Baekhyun forced a smile at the taller and said, “How about we call it a day?”  
  
“Yeah, of course. Do you feel better now?”  
  
“I do. I had fun today. Thank you, Chanyeol” this time, he gave him a smile that seemed so genuinely sweet that Chanyeol really believed if he felt all much better than a few hours earlier. The way his lips lifted upward and the way his teeth were prefectly aligned sent an unexpected warmth rushing through his system. His smile was a ray of sunshine, and Chanyeol was a sunburn.  
  
Knowing that the brunet was happy while being with him made him happy. He knew it wouldn’t last for a long time because after this – when he walked him back home, Baekhyun would go back to being someone else’s husband. He could only wish the time would go by slowly.  
  
Chanyeol let Baekhyun lead the way after the fireworks ended. Since there weren’t many things they could do aside of walking around, they agreed to call it a day. When they reached Baekhyun’s house, he waited for Baekhyun to call his husband to open the door for him because even though he had the keys with him, he wasn’t sure if it was alright for him to come back without telling him beforehand.  
  
He would worry about meeting him later, but for now, he only wanted Baekhyun to be safely at home so he could go back to Seoul without having to worry about him anymore.  
  
“Sehun’s not picking up. I think he’s not home.” Baekhyun blurted out after he tried calling his husband.  
  
“Are you sure?”  
  
“Yeah. He’s probably on a flight right now. Or he’s out with his friends. I have no idea.. I actually haven’t replied to any of his messages. He must’ve thought I won’t be coming back home anymore so he didn’t come back.”  
  
“He’ll be back. He’s been looking for you. Have you texted him?”  
  
“I did.. Should we just wait inside? I have the keys with me.”  
  
“You get inside then. I’ll go back.”  
  
“But it’s late. How are you planning to come back?”  
  
“I’ll take the train.”  
  
“Can’t you just wait until Sehun replies?”  
  
“I don’t know, Baek... I don’t think I should be here.. It’s late. I should just go back.”  
  
“But I want you to be with me just for a little bit longer.”  
  
Did he hear it right? Did he really need him right now?  
  
He shook his head at the bluntness, but he couldn’t refuse the offer because he, _too,_ wanted to spend a little bit more time with him.  
  
“Why?”  
  
“Just because.”  
  
Nothing was going to happen, right? Because he knew Baekhyun would come back to his husband no matter what they had gone through. He was being irrational for wanting him, and he wanted to get over these feelings as soon as he could. After this night, he would forget him. And he would never leave give him a chance to walk into his life anymore.  
  
“Okay.. but I won’t be long.”  
  
Once inside, Baekhyun led him to sit on a couch in the middle of the room. He propped himself on the soft material, letting out a sigh. Sitting next to him, Chanyeol shifted uncomfortably in his seat, glancing unceremoniously around to avoid catching the other’s glances passed at him.  
  
“Do you want something to drink?” the brunet asked.  
  
“No, thanks. Maybe later.”  
  
“Okay then..Wait here, I’ll take a bottle just in case.”  
  
Chanyeol watched him walk over to the counter to pick a bottle of wine and two glasses. When he came back, he placed them on the table in front of them without saying anything. Baekhyun checked his phone one more time, and his shoulders slumped when he realised the awaited replies didn’t come.  
  
“Do you wanna tell me what happened now?” Chanyeol asked, observing him discreetly when Baekhyun wasn’t looking his way.  
  
A heavy silence settled over them. It was thicker than the uneasy tension atmosphere. Chanyeol felt painfully out of place. He didn’t know what to do, didn’t know how to break the invisible wall of ice standing between them. He felt like he should apologize for bringing _that_ up. _Again._  
  
“Did you hate me when I told you I was married?”  
  
“Huh?”  
  
“After you kissed me.. were you upset that I pushed you away?”  
  
“I.. um, well, I was angry, but now that I think of it, you must have a reason for keeping it a secret from me.”  
  
“I do.” Baekhyun nodded his head as he poured a drink into his glass. “You know, it’s been around three years or so..” he blurted out before taking a sip of his drink. He let the liquor stay in his mouth before gulping it down, “If you’re wondering how long I have been with him.”  
  
“Oh.. That’s quite a long time.”  
  
“It is.”  
  
“Are you happy with him?” Chanyeol asked, his gaze shifting from the glass in his hand to his face  
  
“I don’t know.”  
  
“You should know. Aren’t married couple supposed to be happy?”  
  
“Do you think _all_ married couples are happy?”  
  
“Well, yeah.. most of them are.”  
  
“Then why is there such a thing as a divorce?”  
  
Chanyeol couldn’t answer his question. He’d always thought that marriage was something so beautiful that everybody wanted. It was something that bonded two people who loved each other and wanted to spend the rest of their life together. He didn’t understand why Baekhyun made it sound like marriage was not worth it.  
  
But he was right. Why was there a divorce if marriage is not designed to make people happy?  
  
“I was never happy, Chanyeol. Marriage is not supposed to make me feel happy and satisfied, but I still tried my best to make it work because people could change. I hope Sehun could change, too, so I pushed you away even though I know we could’ve been more than just friends.”  
  
_More than just friends._ Chanyeol gulped. His throat was dry, and he needed oxygen because he feel suffocated inside. Even if Baekhyun wanted them to be more than just friends, was he ready to give him that chance to be with him? But what would that make him? He would turn Baekhyun into a cheater, and he would be someone who ruined a relationship as sacred as marriage.  
  
“You should live your life the way you want to. If he doesn’t make you happy, you should leave him. I’m not suggesting you to file a divorce, _no_. I still want you to solve whatever problems you have with him but happiness is a personal choice. You have a right to choose what you think could make you happy.”  
  
“I was–no, I’m.. I’m happy when I’m with you,” Baekhyun caught him staring before he trailed off, “I don’t even know why I feel that way. It’s terrifying.”  
  
“Do you still love him?”  
  
“I don’t know. Maybe I do, but I’m not as happy as I used to. I resent my life. I resent him for leaving me for days, even weeks. I was lonely, Chanyeol. You don’t know how hard it could get to be alone when it’s dark outside, and you have no one to share your sorrow with.”  
  
“That sometimes happen in a relationship. You can’t demand him to be with you all the time.” Chanyeol placed his arm on his shoulder, giving him a reassuring squeeze, “Why didn’t you try to resolve things with him? Why are you running away?”  
  
“We had our arguments. It couldn’t be solved.” Baekhyun stopped before he continued, “I think.. I’ve fallen too deep, Chanyeol. It was dark again when you weren’t there. When you left me without a trace. I was scared.” He moved his head closer to him. Chanyeol sat frozen, his breath heavy for knowing where this would lead him to. When he realized Baekhyun had leaned in a little closer, their foreheads touching, he pulled away before their lips could brush, his head tilted to the side.  
  
“I don’t know, Baek. I care about you, but this is wrong. We can’t be like this,” he shook his head, “I’m sorry.”  
  
Chanyeol didn’t spare him another glance before he stood up from his position and proceeded to leave him behind. Baekhyun was quick to grab his wrist, stopping him from taking another step, “Chanyeol, wait! I’m sorry.”  
  
“Let go of me, Baek. I have to go.”  
  
“Where are you going?”  
  
“It’s not right for us to be like this. You’re just using me as a rebound. You have a husband. I shouldn’t have come with you. I shouldn’t have felt comfortable around you. You were wrong. It was my mistake too. I’m sorry..”  
  
“No, Chanyeol, please- listen to me,” Baekhyun tightened his grip on Chanyeol’s wrist, “It wasn’t a mistake. What we had was real. A few months back.. they were real.”  
  
“Baekhyun.. can’t you see that we couldn’t make it work? Every night since you walked out on me, I had to wonder why you did it. I know you have a reason but why? Why did you have to lie to me in the beginning?”  
  
“I was just- I was lonely. And I know you would’ve avoided me if you knew I was married. Darn it, Chanyeol! I hate myself too.”  
  
“We could’ve stayed as friends.”  
  
“We could. But perhaps, I wouldn’t have lied to you if I wanted you to be my friend. I don’t know why I’m being like this, but I think.. part of me wanted you to stay too.”  
  
“This is wrong, Baek.”  
  
“Please don’t say that.”  
  
“I have to go. I should’ve gone since this morning.” Chanyeol tried to push the other’s hand off him, and with a dejected heart, Baekhyun loosened his grip.  
  
“So you regret it, now? You _like_ me, Chanyeol. I know you do.”  
  
“Fine, I _like_ you. What do you suppose I should do then? Should I snatch you away from your husband whom you still love so dearly when you had a quarrel like this. And just because you couldn’t solve the problem with him, you think it’s right for me to help you forget him and become a household wrecker? Do you think that would make me happy?”  
  
As Chanyeol scanned Baekhyun’s face for a reaction, the silence hung in the air before the other finally made his declaration of truth of what actually happened.  
  
“He cheated on me.” he said, his voice shaky. The statement lingered in the air, thick and heavy like a blanket.  
  
“What?”  
  
“My husband cheated on me. Can’t you hear?” Baekhyun raised his voice this time so that Chanyeol could hear him clearly. His eyes were already brimming with tears, but he couldn’t break now. He had to tell him everything.  
  
“I ran away from home because he freaking cheated on me.”  
  
Chanyeol ran his hand through his hair three times in quick succession, a feeling that was akin to anger boiling up inside. “Why didn’t you tell me? I wouldn’t have brought you here had I known that was the case.”  
  
“I’m sorry... I should’ve told you. I couldn’t stand it. It was too much, Yeol. He never had time for me. I thought I was just being too paranoid for not having him around, but I don’t think.. I don’t think that was the case. I have to wait for days or even weeks to meet him. I feel really betrayed when I found out.” Baekhyun covered his face with both of his palms as if trying to hide from the world and started hiccupping. Chanyeol moved closer and held him in his arm. He guided him to sit on the couch, and when they were finally seated, Baekhyun sobbed into his chest unceasingly, hands clutching at his shirt. He just broke down, and Chanyeol could only let him cry onto his chest and pat his back. Chanyeol watched him in silence as the pearl-shaped tears rolled down his cheeks from his luminous eyes.  
  
“It’s okay. Everything will be okay.”  
  
Baekhyun blinked the last drop of his tears from his eyes, pushing himself off slightly from the comfort that was Chanyeol. He looked straight into the other’s eyes before he continued, “I pushed you away because I don’t want to hurt him. I know if I was giving in to my heart, I would’ve cheated on him too…with you. But in the end, I still chose him because I thought we could still work. Now, I don’t know anymore. I don’t know what I want. I don’t know if I wanted to come back to him again and fix everything. I don’t know if I still love him. Is it too bad if I want to end things with him?”  
  
“Why would you end things with him? Don’t you still love him?  
  
“I don’t know. Maybe I do, but I don’t wanna spend the rest of my life waiting for him anymore. He’s not going to come back to me.”  
  
“How are you so sure? What if he was just confused? What if he still loves you?”  
  
“He won’t cheat on me if he still does. There’s nothing worse than being betrayed. I know I’m not a saint myself, but at least I could still keep myself from going too far...with you.”  
  
“Did you have feelings for me?”  
  
Baekhyun blinked his eyes at the question. Did he? Did he have feelings for Chanyeol? It was scary to admit, but whenever he was with him, he was _happy_. Being near him gave him a serenity he could never know without him being close. It was calming. And it was the feeling he had never felt before. He didn’t need to worry when he would leave or when he would come back again because in the time they had spent together, Chanyeol never left. It was him who pushed him away. It was him who gave him a reason to leave.  
  
“I do. I like you, Chanyeol. I wouldn’t have pushed you away if I didn’t have any feelings for you. I was scared because I knew we couldn’t be together. That’s why I told you to stay away.”  
  
Baekhyun shifted and moved a little closer than he already was to him. He knew he was going to regret this later, but for now, he wanted to forget everything. He wanted to forget the fact that he was still Sehun’s. For a moment, he wanted to pretend that he was not married. For once, he wanted to feel loved because he was tired of being the one who loved – the one who gave but never receiving.  
  
His body was tired of waiting for someone that wasn’t going to come home to him every night even when he was supposed to do so.  
  
His heart was tired of aching. The pain was unbearable that he couldn’t stand it anymore. If there was someone who could heal him, it would be Chanyeol. If there was someone who could get him out of the darkest pit of sorrow that was his marriage, it would be Chanyeol.  
  
Maybe he had fallen for him from a long time ago, and maybe he just didn’t realize it. His marriage was the only reason that kept his feelings for Chanyeol unannounced – buried deep within himself. If only he wasn’t married, he probably would have dated him.  
  
“Stay.” He whispered in the air, loud enough for the other to hear.  
  
As Baekhyun scanned Chanyeol’s eyes for a reaction, the silence hung in the air like the suspended moment before he leaned his face closer. Chanyeol could almost hear the sound of Baekhyun’s breath in front of him. It was harsh but not too stertorous. He stared at the man in front of him, and he noticed Baekhyun had been quietly staring at his lips in such a close proximity. He brought his hand to tilt Baekhyun’s face up so he could look at him and observe his flawless features clearly. Baekhyun sure looked too beautiful for a guy, and he couldn’t help but to trail his thumb to caress his cheek and the side of his face down to his jaw. His orbs as black as starless sky, and it revealed more than his words could express.  
  
He felt the older tense under his touch. He parted his lips, causing their breath to mingle. As Baekhyun was about to close the proximity between them, Chanyeol leaned closer first and claimed the older’s lips. They shut their eyes close when their lips finally pressed against each other. The kiss was nothing but delicate, sweet and gentle. Chanyeol deepened the kiss as he brought his hand to the back of Baekhyun’s neck, and Baekhyun gave access for him to devour his lips. When Baekhyun was about to open his mouth to give Chanyeol more access to explore every corner of his mouth, the taller parted and said in between his heavy breath,  
  
“Are you sure with this?”Chanyeol questioned, eyes never leaving the man before him. Baekhyun gave a slight nod in response. Before he could say another word, Chanyeol had leaned forward and closed the gap between them again.  


***

  
  
Chanyeol didn’t know how he managed to get Baekhyun whimpering in need against his mouth. He also didn’t _want_ to remember the fact that while Baekhyun was desperately throwing himself at him, he still belonged to someone else. The more he thought about it, the more he wanted to hate himself for doing _this_ to him – for taking advantage of the situation.  
  
He knew more than anything that his lips weren’t his to begin with, but Chanyeol had claimed them. The feeling of his lips against his was familiar, and he wasn’t sure whether he would be forgiven when Baekhyun’s husband found out that he’s been lied to.  
  
Chanyeol decided that he would think about it later.  
  
He wanted _this_. More than anything he wanted to make Baekhyun realise how much he was being loved. He wanted him to forget about the pain. At that moment, he knew he was probably just a rebound for him, but he didn’t care anymore. He believed this was what Baekhyun wanted too.  
  
This time, the kiss was no longer slow and languid. It started to get much more intense, and it involved tongues. Licking every corner of the older lips, Chanyeol explored his mouth like it was some kind of a wondrous. Baekhyun shut his eyes as he felt the other showering him with sloppy kisses. He whimpered as Chanyeol tried to gently touch his tongue with his. He responded by softly caressing his tongue against the taller’s. He stroke his arm as the taller shoved his tongue into his mouth–slowly but sure. He gladly welcomed it. He could feel his tongue wandering and exploring every corner of his mouth. He shut his eyes and pulled the taller closer by the neck.  
  
When they parted from their long make-out session, Baekhyun could only stare, eyes never leaving the man before him. His breathing was heavy; it was as if Chanyeol had sucked the air out of him completely.  
  
Baekhyun had to stifle the urge to moan when Chanyeol’s fingers danced gracefully over his clothed chest, brushing over his seemingly sensitive nipples. Nimble fingers slipped the remaining buttons loose on his shirt. Now hanging completely open, he felt the material slide free of one shoulder. He shivered due to the sudden cold in the air.  
  
Chanyel leaned forward and showered his milky skin with light kisses. Flicking a glance at the brunet, he could tell the the other was reaching the limit of his patience by the way his head lolled to the back. And from the arousal straining against the fabric of his pants, he knew he had him right where he wanted him.  
  
Slipping his arms free of the shirt, Baekhyun felt it slide to the floor behind him. His own arousal was rubbing painfully against his pants and he barely held back his own moans. At this rate, he knew he wouldn’t be lasting much longer.  
  
“Are we gonna do this here?” he asked in between his heavy breathing.  
  
Staring at him in silence, Chanyeol answered, “Show me where the bed is.”  
  
Chanyeol’s voice was too deep that it could make his toes curl. Baekhyun had to wonder himself if he was dreaming. Without wasting much time, they made their way to his bedroom while still being locked in a passionate kiss.  
  
They landed on Baekhyun’s bed in a mess of limbs. Pressing himself against the brunet, Chanyeol rocked his hips back and forth in an uncoordinated manner. He captured his lips then parted for a while, escalating the sound of sensual groans from the brunet’s lips. Nipping gently at the skin he laved over the bites with his tongue as he looked into those brown eyes, all he could see were the lust and love that bubbled beneath the surface.  
  
“You’re beautiful, Baekhyun.” Chanyeol muttered as he caressed his cheek with his index finger. His eyes were staring fondly at him that he thought he could almost get lost in the beauty of his eyes. He was still not sure whether Baekhyun felt the same, but this was his _chance_. A chance to show him just how much he loved him.  
  
Naked and sprawled beneath him, Chanyeol trailed his calloused finger up to fix the strands of Baekhyun’s hair that were trying to cover his eyes from looking at him.  
  
Chanyeol had never wanted anyone this much. Baekhyun was the first that made his mind paralyzed. It was as if he couldn’t think rationally whenever he was with him. Thoughts of him plagued his mind, and he didn’t know _how_ to move on even though he was already informed of the bitter truth.  
  
If it was possible, he wanted to kiss Baekhyun a thousand times. He wanted to map every part of his body just to remember every mole and every scar he had on it. He wanted to.. he just wanted to love Baekhyun the way his husband couldn’t.  
  
“I really.. like you, Baekhyun.” he kissed his temple.  
  
Moving down to peck his nose, “I want this.”  
  
“I hope you won’t regret this.”  
  
Chanyeol didn’t let the other say anything in return as he was quick to claim his lips in another kiss before slowly moving down to his sensitive spot under his earlobe. He suckled and nipped gently on it, hearing the sweet pants that were just for him. It was magical. To be able to hear every sinful sounds and whimpering coming out of his mouth that were meant for him was something that he hoped would become his privilege one day.  
  
Moving downwards, he glimpsed the two stiffened nubs that were demanding more of his attention. Sucking one into his mouth, he ran his tongue over the sensitized tissue, the muscle mapping out the skin that lay between his teeth. He noted how Baekhyun was always so responsive to his nipples being sucked or caressed. He switched to its twin then, laving it with the same attention.  
  
Chanyeol felt Baekhyun shivering underneath him as his mouth attached itself to his nipple, the rough texture of his tongue mapping a path across the sensitive peak.  
  
“Ah…” Baekhyun couldn’t help the moan and pants that bubbled out of his throat as Chanyeol’s tongue finished with one nipple only to flick over the other one. The taller leaned forward and wrapped his thumb and finger around one of the nubs, tugging and pulling on it until Baekhyun’s back was arched off the bed, “Chanyeol...ah..”  
  
“I’m sorry.. did it hurt?” Chanyeol whispered as he nipped the brunet’s ear, his tongue reaching out to lave gently over the abused area.  
  
Baekhyun tilted his head slightly to face him, cupping his face as he whispered, “It’s okay.. You can continue.”  
  
Chanyeol only blinked his eyes as the brunet spreaded open, his legs placed over his shoulders, “Prepare me. You can do anything you want.” the brunet breathed, his forehead covered in sweat. Without waiting any further, Chanyeol prompted the brunet to lift his hips so that he could remove the confines of his briefs. He threw them across the room, not minding where it might have landed.  
  
Chanyeol’s eyes trailed down to the brunet’s erect member and his flawless thighs. Baekhyun watched as Chanyeol began to wrap his calloused hand around it, pumping it up and down slowly.  
  
He let go of his hardened member and leaned down between the brunet’s legs. He spread his cheeks apart in order to get a clear view of his puckered hole. He circled his index finger around the entrance, pushing one digit half way into it. Baekhyun moaned due to the simple ministration he was giving him. He could feel the brunet had already started to brace himself and get more comfortable on the bed  
  
Leaning closer into the small space between Baekhyun’s thighs, his tongue peeked out to poke at the hole. The brunet’s body shivered and Chanyeol started to lave around the rim before thrusting his tongue in and out of Baekhyun’s entrance. He felt the walls inside him tighten around his tongue. Spreading the brunet’s butt cheeks, he continued fucking him with his tongue, occasionally adding two of his fingers in to widen the tight entrance.  
  
Baekhyun moaned at the intrusion, the wet heat and slick fingers turning him on more than he thought they would. He’d never had that before in his three years of his marriage. With Sehun, it had always been vanilla, and now that Chanyeol showed him what it felt like to have a tongue up his ass, he feel wanted. Baekhyun lolled his head to the back, his hair sticking out in a disarray manner as the giant’s tongue plunged deep into him, opening him even wider than before. His stomach tightened and he could feel himself getting close when he felt Chanyel working his hand on his neglected member. He grasped a handful of his hair in hope that the giant would let him rest even for just a brief second. As much as he liked being fucked with his tongue, Chanyeol had been dragging it on for too long.  
  
“Just fuck me already, would you?” the brunet breathed out as he made an attempt to slowly push the giant’s head away.  
  
He looked up at him through his lashes and grinned. Reaching down to his entrance, he pushed two of his digits inside in one swift movement, moving in scissor-like motion as he trailed kisses up his naval to his chest, his neck until his lips brushed over the other’s lips. Slightly parting his lips open for the taller, Chanyeol savoured his lips for the umpteenth time, leaving him breathless.  
  
He continued moving his fingers in and out as he watched the brunet’s expression under him. Baekhyun was stunning. That was a fact anyone shouldn’t have denied, but Chanyeol didn’t think that the man could be any more beautiful than he was now – the look of pleasure and ecstasy marring his beautiful face as he was painting heavily. His eyes were fluttered shut and his mouth was slightly agape.  
  
It gave him a little ache in his chest to remember that there was somebody out there who was already used to seeing such a magnificent sight. There was somebody out there who had fucked and even made love to this man that he loved.  
  
A groan could be heard throughout the room when Chanyeol parted his lips only to lean forward, placing his lips next to Baekhyun’s ear, “Are you sure with this?”  
  
“I’m freaking sure, Chanyeol! Just take me already.”  
  
“Okay.. I love you, okay? I’ll be gentle and I’ll make you feel good.” Baekhyun gave a whimper and a nod.  
  
For Chanyeol, Baekhyun was like the trap he’d been wanting to fall into. He knew it was dangerous, but he still dragged himself into it. After this night, he knew it would be harder than it already was to forget him. He might even turn into a selfish bastard for wanting Baekhyun more than he should be.  
  
But he wouldn’t think of the consequences that were awaiting him. It drove him crazy knowing that he couldn’t have Baekhyun while he was not happy being with the man he was with. It infuriated him to the point that he just wanted to take Baekhyun away from him and run away. He _was_ angry.  
  
Chanyeol seemed to give in to his desires as he raised Baekhyun’s hips into the air, placing them both on top of his shoulders. Now that there was a chance for him to prove that Baekhyun deserved better, he would show him what it meant to feel loved and wanted.  
  
Positioning himself in between the brunet, he pumped his erected cock with his hand for a few more times as he stared at the beauty under him. Guiding his erection at the brunet’s entrance, he teased the rim before slowly moving his hips forward to enter him. Chanyeol cursed as he watched half of his cock had disappeared into Baekhyun’s slick, tight heat.  
  
Baekhyun moaned at the intrusion. The sensation of being filled half the way as the taller’s cock pressed into his entrance stung, but he knew it would feel good _soon_. He panted as he waited for his body to adjust and then he felt the friction as the giant thrusted in and out at as a slow pace, his motions driving him higher to that pinnacle of desire.  
  
Leaning forward, Chanyeol placed his arms on either side of the brunet’s head and grinded his hips forward, the position allowing him to push his cock deeper inside Baekhyun. He locked his lips with the brunet, feeling their bodies getting hotter in each thrust. The feeling of Baekhyun’s walls tightened around his throbbing cock was driving him to the brink of insanity.  
  
“H-harder.” Baekhyun panted out as he wrapped his hands around the giant’s waist, making an effort to push his hips into him even harder than before.  
  
In one swift movement, Chanyeol pulled out almost all the way before thrusting all the way in. A few moments of this and Baekhyun wasn’t groaning in pain anymore but pleasure. The brunet began to move his hips to meet the giant’s, and Chanyeol was quick to grab onto them and began to direct Baekhyun’s movements. When a cry broke from the brunet’s throat, Chanyeol quickened the pace, hitting Baekhyun’s sweet spot over and over again.  
  
“Chanyeol.. I can’t. I’m going to…ah” Baekhyun screamed when his prostrate was hit repeatedly.  
  
The giant couldn’t hold back any longer when he saw the look of ecstasy and release on Baekhyun’s face. Feeling himself almost reaching his climax, Chanyeol thrusted harder as he cupped Baekhyun’s chin and kissed him passionately at the same moment his seed filled Baekhyun. The brunet’s cavern closed tightly around him, drawing out his orgasm while Baekhyun had his own.  
  
When his breath was no longer clogged in his lungs, Chanyeol lifted himself off the brunet and switched their positions so Baekhyun could lay on his chest. He smiled at him for a few seconds, staring at each other’s eyes instantly before he kissed the top of his head, “You were amazing.”  
  
Baekhyun shook his head, drawing soothing circles on the taller’s chest, “You too. I wish I’ve met you long before I met him.”  
  
Chanyeol couldn’t even imagine living without him in his life at the moment. He pulled the brunet up to rest next to him. Facing him, Chanyeol cupped his cheek with his large hand, looking into his eyes, “Let’s worry about other things tomorrow.” He said as he reached his hand out to brush Baekhyun’s bangs back from his forehead before he leaned down to kiss him on his temple.  
  
Now that he had slept with him, Chanyeol believed sinful was his middle name. He knew it was going to put both of them in a difficult situation, but he only listened to the devil in his head. He knew what he was getting himself into, but he let himself come this far.  
  
Baekhyun had a husband. He knew what the consequences were of having an affair with someone that already belonged to someone else. He sure as hell _knew_. But he wanted to be selfish for just a little while.  
  
When tomorrow came, he would forget that this night ever happened between.  
  
When tomorrow came, he would walk away from him and leave him for good.  


***

  
  
The next morning, Chanyeol woke up to find an arm over his chest. Tilting his face to the side, he realized there was a lithe figure sleeping safe and sound under his arms. He didn’t know what was going to happen now that they had slept together. He didn’t know what he meant to Baekhyun, and he didn’t know whether Baekhyun was actually aware of the fact that they can’t be together as long as he was still with Sehun. He released a long sigh and got off the bed to collect his clothes that had been thrown all over the floor since last night. He tried not to make any noise as not to wake up Baekhyun. When he was done putting on his clothes, he gathered his stuff and stared at the peaceful man who was still in his deep slumber before he walked out of the door.  
  
What happened between him and Baekhyun last night was just an accident. It might have not meant anything because Chanyeol was sure he was only a distraction to him. It made his heart swell in pain knowing that he couldn’t do anything even if he wanted to help him get out of his situation.  
  
He was only someone Baekhyun kept close because he was confused with his feelings. He was nobody to him and he intended to keep it that way.  
  
Chanyeol took a deep breath as he exited the house. He dragged his feet forward, his shoulders slumped. He had no idea where to go or what to do. The sky was blue above him, and it was covered in wispy clouds. He kept his hands hidden inside of his pocket as the morning breeze hit his skin. It was then he realized he was walking in a direction to the park where he mostly spent his time with Baekhyun. Come to think of it, he realized he had spent a lot of his time here during his stay in the town back then to notice that nothing had changed much.  
  
He made short little steps, his brain struggling to tell each foot to take the next step as he approached the bench that he used to sit often with Baekhyun. He sat on the bench with his shoulders hunched to the back and his eyes cast down in a mournful gaze.  
  
“Chanyeol?”  
  
Startled, Chanyeol was back into focus and he stood up immediately before turning his head to the source of the voice. Baekhyun was there. He was standing not too far away from him dressed in his casual outfit. He must’ve picked whatever he could find in his closet and rushed all the way here when he realized Chanyeol wasn’t there in his bed.  
  
“You shouldn’t be here. You said Sehun would be coming. Don’t you wanna ask him about what happened first and work things out with him?”  
  
Baekhyun lingered his stare at the taller, eyes brimming with tears. He made a few small steps towards the taller until they were finally facing each other. “I can’t be with him. I already told you I don’t want to be with him.”  
  
“Look at me, Chanyeol. Look me in the eyes.” Baekhyun placed his hands on both of his shoulders firmly, searching for his eyes, “I don’t know since when it had started, but I like you.” A single tear rolled down his cheeks as he let the words come out of his mouth. Chanyeol felt his heart tightening as Baekhyun uttered those exact words.  
  
“When I told you to leave that day, there were so many things I wanted to say to you. So many things that I had kept inside my heart, locked away from you for all this time I’ve known you. I wanted to tell you, to tell you the feelings I had for you inside.”  
  
Chanyeol turned his head to the side as to avoid looking into the brunet’s eyes. He didn’t want to be selfish, but now that Baekhyun had confessed his feelings to him, he had become that way and yearned for something he shouldn’t have yearned since the moment they met. He shook his head before he replied, “It’s just too fast. I’ve been trying to move on from you but now.. everything seems to move so quickly. And I’m not ready for what comes next.”  
  
“I know. I know, Chanyeol. That’s why I came here to tell you this. We might not be together now, but please don’t go. Don’t stay away from my sight.”  
  
Chanyeol looked down at him intently, taking one of Baekhyun’s hand in his and squeezed it gently, “I’m sorry that I can’t stop loving you. No matter what I do, I always find my way back to you. You know what we did last night wasn’t just a mistake, but I know where I should stand. I know myself that.. that I can’t have you.. as long as you’re still with him.”  
  
“It wasn’t a mistake, _yes_. You shouldn’t blame yourself too much because I want to be with you. I feel like I am complete when I’m with you. I will do whatever it takes to make you come to me again. You are so much more than just a friend. You are everything in my life that I need and want in my life. No one else can or will replace you, not even my husband.”  
  
And then Chanyeol looked at him again, his eyes burning into him, into his soul. He remained silent because he knew Baekhyun had a lot to say.  
  
“I’m not sure if this is going to work out. But I’m willing to risk my marriage to be with you.”  
  
Chanyeol leaned closer and wrapped him in his embrace. His chest felt tight, and the words seemed to stuck in his throat. He reached out to wrap his hand firmly around the brunet’s waist while the other tangled itself in his locks, and he was suddenly full of warmth. Heat rushed through his veins as he pressed him against his chest.  
  
“What if you’re not over him yet?”  
  
“I'm completely in love with you. I don’t think I still have feelings for him. I love you, Chanyeol. I know it might sound crazy but I have loved you all along.”  
  
“Do you really want to take this chance with me?”  
  
“I do. Please don’t ever leave me again.”  
  
At the moment, Baekhyun could feel his heart stampede against his chest. His eyes drifted close and the tears fell again. It had been so long. So long since he had someone who really cared for him. He pulled away just enough to look into his eyes. Chanyeol stared at him, and his stare caused his tears to pour out again. He wiped them away with his thumb, hoping that it could make the smaller feel better.  
  
Baekhyun clutched him tighter, wrapping his arms around his back. And then Chanyeol leaned forward, locking their lips together after a few hours of being apart. The sudden bolt of electricity startled him as it shot up his spine. Baekhyun felt his head spin as his heart threatened to fall out of his chest. Chanyeol came into his life like a wave crashing onto the seaside, sudden and unexpected. He couldn’t quite recall the first time Chanyeol made his heart beat a few times faster. It was perhaps during their long walk to the hill or it could be during their visit to the amusement park. Even he couldn’t recall the first time he felt comfortable by just being around him.  
  
But it was obvious that they needed each other. Without each other, their lives would be meaningless. Without each other, it would be hard for them to even breathe.  
  
Chanyeol pulled him close by the waist as he whispered, “I won’t leave you again. Even if you push me away, I will always come back to you, and you will always come back to me.”  
  
_Cause with you, I’ll withstand all of hell to hold your hand…_  


The End

  


 

  


~Epilogue~

  
  
A house was not a home when you don’t have somebody waiting for you. It was an empty vessel that only came alive when someone was living in it. When Sehun stepped into a house he had always called _home,_ it was almost impossible for him to feel like he was finally home. The house he had bought a few years back as the result of his hard labour was no longer the home he shared with the one he loved. Without Baekhyun’s presence in it, it was simply just a building without inhabitant. Instead of getting a cheerful greeting of _welcome home_ that he usually received when he got home, he was welcomed by a defeaning silence hanging in the air that gnawed at his insides because there wasn’t somebody waiting for him anymore. There wasn’t somebody who would come to him and wrap his arms around his neck and ask him about his _week_ at work.  
  
Sehun had only realised that he missed Baekhyun when he could no longer feel his presence anymore. He had just realised that all this time they had been together, he had been the bad guy in their relationship, and he _regretted_ it. The regret washed over him like the long slow waves on a shallow beach. It would keep coming back at him and haunt him all over again until he was tired of being consumed by it.  
  
It had been two weeks since he didn’t get any calls back from his husband. When he woke up the following morning after Baekhyun had found out about his affair with the flight attendant he had met six months prior at his work, Baekhyun was already gone. He wasn’t there where he would usually find him stirring beside him in the morning when they woke up together as the faint rays of sunlight peeked through the curtains of the room. He had searched all of the rooms, but he couldn’t find a sight of him anywhere. He realised Baekhyun had ran away from home when he went to check on his drawer, and some of his clothes were missing.  
  
He never meant to hurt Baekhyun, and he never wanted him to go just like that. He had been clouded by anger when he found out about his affair that he turned into someone whom he couldn’t even recognize – cold and so atrocious that he himself could understand if Baekhyun hated him for that. He would be surprised if he was fine with the whole situation and came back to him like nothing had happened.  
  
Sehun married Baekhyun because he believed he was the one.  
  
Over the years they had been together, Sehun had only inflicted pain on him.  
  
He never intended to cheat on him in the first place, but it just _happened._ It wasn’t like he didn’t love Baekhyun at all. _No_. He loved him. He cared about him, but somewhere along the way, the feelings had worn off that he didn’t know what to do.  
  
Maybe it was because of their lack of time together. He realised that being a pilot that he was, it was impossible for him to be around Baekhyun every second of everyday.  
  
Maybe they were just not meant to be together.  
  
He wanted to apologize and try to resolve things with him, but he didn’t think there would even be a chance for him to do so. If he was in Baekhyun’s place, he would’ve done the same. He would run away because what was worse than knowing you were being betrayed? What was worse than being forced to have an intimate relationship when you didn’t want it?  
  
Baekhyun had made a decision. And it was best for Sehun to respect him because he was not the victim here. His husband was hurt because of him, and he should’ve realised it earlier that Baekhyun had been hurting alone all this time.  
  
Now that he had known Baekhyun no longer wanted to be with him, there was no way to make it right. They couldn’t have gone back to where they were before. There was just no way back. It was just impossible for them to fix the broken strings and live together again. Baekhyun had been hurting too much, and knowing that he was the reason of it all, he didn’t have guts to show his face in front of him, let alone to keep living with him.  
  
Maybe it was for the better. Maybe him finally asking for a divorce was the only way fot them to get themselves out of this mess. Releasing a long exasperated sigh, Sehun took the ballpoint that had been lying on the table and held it in his hand. Scanning through the pages for one last time, he signed on it willingly.  
  
Baekhyun deserved better. He deserved someone who could keep him and happy, someone who would hold him in arms and tell him just how much he mattered in this world. He deserved to live with someone who would love him with all his heart. And that _someone_ was not Sehun. Sehun might be his husband, but he couldnt give Baekhyun happiness. He couldn’t love him enough, and he couldn’t be loyal to him.  
  
And as much as he wanted Baekhyun to be _his_ again, things couldn’t have gone back to the way it was because he, _too_ , had changed. He was always honest with him, but he wasn’t anymore. He loved him, but _maybe_ , he didn’t want to be with him anymore because he couldn’t stand being so far apart for him.  
  
He _hurt_ him, and he had become someone who could only inflict pain on him.  
  
Had he known Baekhyun was also affected by his lack of time for him, he wouldn’t have let him suffer. He would’ve had let go if it was the only way he could do for him to make him at least happy.  
  
He would rather leave him earlier before he’d grown numb of him.  
  
Maybe it had never been _him_ who were destined to be with Baekhyun. Maybe it had never been _him_ who could give the happiness he deserved.  
  
Baekhyun loved him, but he had chosen to let go.  
  
He had _chosen_ a different path.  
  
Because their love wasn’t meant for forever.


End file.
